


Justice Reversed

by Ruoste



Series: Reversed [1]
Category: Persona 5
Genre: Akechi Goro Redemption, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Character Development, Character Study, Cognitive Dissonance, Depression, Dissociative Disorder - OSDD, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Eventual Happy Ending, Fluff and Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Domestic Violence, M/M, Persona 5: The Royal, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-13
Updated: 2020-09-30
Packaged: 2021-03-07 01:49:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 19
Words: 44,904
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26448814
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ruoste/pseuds/Ruoste
Summary: What if Akira managed to save Akechi in the engine room? A new social link emerges between the two of them. This time the Justice card is reversed, a path of redemption for long since forgotten just and purity now open.’’Gorō reached his hand towards the glittering light. It faded, but in its place he felt something. He turned the card towards him. There read the number zero, a picture and a title of ’’The fool’’. Gorō laughed as if the card was taunting him and crushed it in his hand. With the card, the world shattered like glass.’’
Relationships: Akechi Goro/Amamiya Ren, Akechi Goro/Kurusu Akira, Akechi Goro/Persona 5 Protagonist
Series: Reversed [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2000587
Comments: 88
Kudos: 220





	1. Divergent

**Author's Note:**

> Title comes from the tarot readings. If a tarot card is reversed it signifies literally the reversed of the meaning. In this case justice it is unbalanced, self-centered, lacking objectivity or unfair.  
> It’s only fitting as that’s how original Akechi was, and in this fic he’s going through the development to become aware of this.
> 
> Using the name Akira instead of Ren for the protagonist as I find it nice how it matches with Akechi’s.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to my great friend and beta Luunappi for the first two chapters! Show them love at https://archiveofourown.org/users/Luunappi/profile

Despite his friend's advice to take it easy, Akira did the exact opposite.

When they had found the key words to Shidō’s palace he was looking to secure the way to the treasure the very next day. His bruises had just begun to heal, and his face still felt sore, yet he couldn’t stay still. It wasn’t as much recklessness as anxiousness on Akira’s part.

He just knew, that even with the complicated trick they played on Akechi, it would be only a matter of time before he figured it out. With all the time Akira had spent with said boy, he could see very clearly how the other always held back. Whether they were throwing darts, or challenging him to a fight. His mind worked at a different wavelength and it wasn’t bound to rules or morals they took for granted, just as the detective had demonstrated at the casino.

Yet even when he tried to kill him, Akira thought that Akechi just couldn’t be pure evil.

He didn’t have any solid proof, only a gut feeling that was proven true when the corrupted detective came to confront them in the Palace. Spilling his heart out in rage, but ultimately defeated, only to be threatened by his own cognitive version.

When Akechi activated the emergency signal with a well aimed shot, Akira got alarmed.

In those few moments he made a split second decision to slide next to Akechi.

Then the wall behind him rose and it trapped them both in.

\---

Akechi stumbled, his mouth open between rage and disbelief.

’’You-! Why would you-!? Can’t you see I tried to spare your life, you piece of shit?!’’

’’I’m not leaving you to die,’’ was his simple answer.

’’Argh! You are insufferable-’’

The laughter of the other Akechi made them stop their bickering. Now that Akira was closer, he could see the strings glittering softly above cognitive Akechi. 

Just a marionette indeed.

’’Even your pointless move couldn't hinder Shidō. A worthless attempt for a puppet. You should take the last opportunity to end his life. Be sure to take your own afterwards. Or would you rather I do it _for_ you?’’ The puppet Akechi shifted his aim to Akira, pointing his gun ready. Akechi made a frustrated grunt.

Akira in turn spied a corner in his line of sight just above the cognitive Akechi.

_If I were to cut his strings_ , Akira determined and carefully readied the device behind his back.

The slight movement was not missed by cognitive Akechi who shot a warning shot near his legs, just barely missing.

’’Which is it, Shidō's puppet? Do I shoot you? Our quest is getting impatient,’’ the puppet taunted.

Akira and Akechi linked eyes and Akira found another gun pointed at him.

It was just a bluff, Joker knew.

’’Do it,’’ the puppet spoke, voice vacant of any emotion.

Akechi nodded to Akira, who in turn swung his hook-shot up. The puppet shot at him, but Akechi threw himself between them. Akira gritted his teeth as he was swung up towards the high ceiling, he carried the weight of Akechi’s body with his other arm.

His knife sled through the puppets' strings with ease and Joker could hear cognitive Akechi’s body slam against the ground helplessly.

\---

’’Joker! Are you alright? Cognitive Akechi’s signal became neutral while Akechi’s signal is getting weaker by the minute! What happened?!’’ Oracle called to him.

’’No time, we have to get out here. Give me a path,’’ Joker spoke quickly, trying to steady his hold on the other.

Akechi was leaning against him heavily and was taking in breaths with shaky pauses. Joker thought bitterly, that Akechi would never willingly lean on him if the situation wasn’t so bad.

’’Give me a moment- Yes! You're near the rear of the ship. If you head forward then there should be an air duct. We will make our way there!’’ the hacker explained.

’’I don’t think Crow is in the shape to squish through an air duct.’’

’’Searching for another route… Found it! If you break a window you can hook-shoot yourself and Akechi onto the deck!’’

’’Thanks, will do,’’ Joker stated and tightened his hold on Akechi.

’’I’m not letting you die…’’ He repeated his promise. He couldn't tell whether Crow was mumbling swears or just sputtering nonsense as he went limp in his arms.

\---

Morgana had cast a healing spell on Akechi. All physical injuries were gone, but he hadn’t awoken up. He was very clearly still alive judging by his breathing and heartbeat, but he remained unconscious.

Akira had mixed feelings about all that had happened.

Why had Akechi tried to protect them?

Was it just as the cognitive version of him had put it? That he just wanted to feel accepted and loved?

Akira didn’t know – wouldn’t know if the other didn't wake up.

’’Could it have something to do with how he transformed into that new form? Or maybe it's a side effect of making those shadows go berserk?’’ Fox pondered.

’’It could be the shot by cognitive Akechi, or the cognitive version could be affecting him in unknown ways,’’ Queen guessed.

It made sense, since the cognitive one was created as a countermeasure against the real Akechi.

’’Hard to tell. We could muse over this forever, but we shouldn’t stay here! Those shadows are still going berserk and they're getting closer,’’ Oracle pointed out.

’’But what are we going to do with him? Where should we bri— _could_ even bring him?’’ Panther asked, pointing at the unconscious Crow still leaning against Akira.

’’He can stay at Leblanc for the time being. If he's not awake by then, I’ll call Takemi for a check up,’’ Joker suggested.

’’Are ya sure that… Boss will be fine with bringing Futaba’s mom’s killer there?’’ Skull asked.

’’And mine,’’ Joker remarked. 

Although it had been just the cognitive version, the fact still remained.

’’Yeah, and yours,’’ Skull cringed at the thought.

’’Oracle? Noir?’’ Joker called out to get their attention.

Despite his own personal feelings towards Akechi, he wouldn’t put them before his team.

Oracle stayed silent and it was Noir who spoke up.

’’I want to hear what happened by his own words. If he was seriously trying to save us by sacrificing his own life.. And… what happened with father.’’

’’Futaba?’’ Joker called to his younger sister in spirit.

’’I… I think it's the best choice. If Shidō’s men were to catch him, they would for sure know our plan to change his heart! We can’t let that happen,’’ Oracle stumbled.

’’It’s decided then.’’

\---

When Akira came home carrying Akechi on his back, Boss was as understanding as ever.

Despite their awkward first impressions, Sōjirō was like a saint in Akira’s eyes.

He didn’t pry too much, but still liked to know who the Phantom thieves’s leader spent his time with. He taught him how to make coffee and curry, and when he learned that Akira and his friends were the Phantom thieves, he was accepting. Honestly, Akira would rather have Sōjirō as his parent than his real ones.

’’He's staying here for now then? Do his parents know about this?’’ Boss asked.

’’…His mother is dead and his father is Shidō, who made his own child a murderer,’’ Akira said bitterly.

’’Dear gods…’’ Sōjirō pressed his fingers to his forehead, taking it in. ’’I can’t believe that Shidō would go on to rob someone so young of his future. No— I guess he robbed yours too. Damn…’’’

’’Does he have any other guardians you're aware of?’’ Sōjirō asked and Akira shook his head.

’’He said he was in multiple foster homes. He lives alone now, he didn’t specify where.’’

Sōjirō grumbled to himself weakly.

’’You seem to know about him well enough. Take care of him and he can stay until this is all over. Whatever you are doing, I mean.’’

\---

Takemi came over to check over Akechi. She didn’t question it and just uttered that she hadn’t known Akira was friends with a celebrity. 

The doctor noted he was a little dehydrated and had anemia — on top of that he was exhausted and would most likely wake up soon. She put him on an IV and went on her way to carry out a few other home calls with a promise to return later.

In the meanwhile, Akira kept pondering how things had ended up like this.

’’If we had met a few years earlier, would we be friends?’’ Akira echoed Akechi’s words, while Morgana moved to sit on his lap.

\---

\---

’’I am thou…’’

’'No, I am thy true self…’’

Gorō was falling somewhere deep.

Dark.

Suffocating.

Nothing was notably different from the usual. But in that depth he could hear voices. His two personas were arguing.

One was the naive child who believed that justice could exist in this world. Not corrupted, nor a word used by selfish adults to justify their wrongs.

Robin hood.

Another, distinctly chaotic and self centered, who would transform to whichever form he'd see fit. He could be a cold-hearted killer, an ace detective, whatever he needed to reach his goal.

Loki.

Sometimes Gorō would wonder, how is it that Kurusu could keep so many Personas inside of him without breaking apart. Just bearing two was exhausting and he couldn’t use them at the same time, unlike Joker, who's capable of switching between them with ease.

**’’How can he be more special than me?’’**

**’’Why is it so easy for him?’’**

**’’What does he have that I don’t?’’**

He already knew the answers to these questions, yet he kept denying them. 

Maybe that’s why he was suffering so much?

Letting Loki twist not just himself, but the truth before him. The truth that went against his own sense of justice.

That’s why it hurt, and made his ears ring. In Gorō's mind, the two were separated from each other as much as possible. His outfits would switch with them, transforming into opposites. Black and white. No harmony between them.

How was Joker able to wear just one outfit, one mask?

How could he keep himself together?

How could Gorō live with all the pain that made him want to tear everything to shreds, and not fall apart?

Kurusu was just better than him no matter what he did, because he had given up. 

That’s why. 

He let Loki take him over, so he didn't have to think of the consequences. Only the goal.

And when he had to suppress Loki to bring out Robin hood, he would be significantly weaker. It worked for his favor when he had to blend in to the Phantom thieves. Yet he would feel more energetic than with Loki, who was overbearing and relentless. His attacks rarely missed his target, Robin Hood’s bow was precise.

Maybe he had grown too comfortable using him, which is why he attacked Joker with it. It was his mistake. Yet fighting against the Phantom thieves with it only brought him pain. So much so that he had to release Loki.

Was fighting against them not justice?

Ah, how they, the great Phantom thieves, had pleaded for him to join their cause.

But he couldn’t.

He couldn’t!

It was too late.

He was already tainted.

An unwanted son.

A son of a prostitute.

A killer.

The last one was the only definite proof he needed. Which is why he'd said that. 

’’If we had met earlier.’’

Yet, in the end, he'd tried to redeem himself. Protect them with his life. And when Joker joined his confrontation with his puppet, Gorō tried to protect him.

And back then, his Persona had been at peace. Even when he'd been defending his weak sense of justice with Loki.

He could control it. Just like with Robin hood.

He knew why, and yet it was of no use now.

Because he was dead and it was too late for regrets.

\---

There was something new within him.

No. It didn’t belong to him, or to his Personas.

A small butterfly glittered into Gorō's view.

’’Please remember… Remember why you are here.’’

Why was he here?

He was dead, right? There was no need to remember.

’’Remember your bonds. Bonds that have given you strength.’’

Bonds? He didn’t have those.

Not after his mother died. Not with any of his foster homes. Not with his schoolmates who knew nothing of the real him. Not with the shallow fans that liked only his looks, ready to turn on him if he showed signs of weakness.

There were no ’’bonds’’ that tied his life to this world.

’’Your one true bond. The one who is waiting’’

Gorō saw flashes of Kurusu Akira. Joker.

Ridiculous.

He was someone who had many friends.

**He** was the one who held true bonds with other people.

Why would he be waiting for him of all things?

He had betrayed him, he had killed him— or at least tried to.

So why…?

Gorō reached his hand towards the glittering light.

It faded, but in its place he felt something.

He turned the card towards him.

There read the number zero, a picture and a title of ’’The fool’’.

Gorō laughed as if the card was taunting him and crushed it in his hand.

With the card, the world shattered like glass.

\---

Gorō woke up with a startle. He rose up breathing rapidly. It was suddenly too bright, too hot and there was a sharp pain in his wrist.

’’A bad timing to wake up. I just pulled out your IV. Try to stay still. Hey, guinea pig, press this against his wrist,’’ the voice of an unknown woman spoke.

He had a hard time interpreting the situation, until Kurusu came to his field of view.

’’You-’’ Gorō’s voice cracked and his mouth felt dry.

What drugs was he on?

Were they going to interrogate him?

It was only fair wasn’t it? The state the cops had left Kurusu was noticeably worse than the one he was in.

Gorō’s eyes followed Kurusu as he pressed a small gauze on his wound. Blood tainted the cloth red, and a goth woman with a doctor's coat gave another piece of gauze to the Phantom thieves' leader.

’’You have to press harder to stop the bleeding, or he’ll bleed dry. …Just kidding,’’ she spoke darkly and Gorō would have cackled, if he wasn’t busy with searching Kurusu’s reaction.

Kurusu remained quiet and did as was told. There was no apparent emotion on his poker face. It was something that annoyed Gorō greatly, because he always had a hard time predicting what he would do, or even hint at what he was thinking.

They were at Leblanc, Gorō noted.

He was seated in his ex-leader’s bed by the window to his dismay. The attic smelled like damp wood and coffee beans. The place put Gorō subconsciously at ease. The place was just quiet enough not to pull him out of his thoughts, but still felt lively. There were small sounds like the boiling water, the old TV above the counter, and inquiries of whether he would like a refill.

He would rather stay here than his own home. His home was just as empty as he was.

The detective’s wrist was bound with a small bandage and the doctor(?) gathered her things. There didn’t seem to be any suspicious substances used on him.

’’Now, don’t study too hard kids. Wouldn’t want you to collapse again and leave you to my mercy,’’ she teased.

Studying? Surely Kurusu should have been able to come up with a better excuse.

’’I’ll keep it in mind. Thank you Doctor,’’ Gorō spoke in his well practiced act.

’’Call me Takemi. Well, I will be going. I hope your friend won’t be a repeating patient,’’ she spoke to Kurusu's way, who in turn tilted his head.

’’But wouldn’t that mean more money for you?’’

’’It would. But these home visits are going to be hard on your wallet. If you can’t afford them, then you’ll have to become a test subject for my new medicine again. Better keep that in mind,’’ she turned to the stairs.

’’You both should rest and take it easy for a few days. Doctor's orders. Now goodnight.’’

’’Thanks for coming,’’ Kurusu gave a brief bow and Takemi descended downstairs.

’’What are you planning to do with me?’’ Gorō dropped his facade immediately; eyes dark, ready to act, back straightened and guarded.

’’What are you expecting me to do?’’ Kurusu in turn smirked.

’’I don’t have time for your games. You have no use for me. It would have been easier to let me die, or if your moral code didn't allow it, then left me to the Diet building after exiting the Palace.’’

’’Do I need a reason?’’

Gorō felt getting more frustrated by the minute and decided to drop it.

’’Then, can I ask why am I in your bed?’’

’’You were unconscious.’’

’’And there is a couch.’’

’’Yeah, I’m going to sleep there.’’

’’So you can keep a better eye on me? No need to bother, I have no intention of escaping. I would be killed by them anyway.’’

Kurusu paused for a moment looking more serious.

’’Are there others?’’

’’Others that can go to Metaverse? No. Others who are ready to kill for Shidō? Yes. You were in that Palace yourself, you saw those yakuza.’’

Remembering something, Gorō tried to feel his jacket for his phone.

’’Sorry. Futaba confiscated it,’’ the other stated, not sounding sorry at all.

’’Good. I was about to get rid of it. If they notice I’m here for longer than usual, they will get suspicious.’’

’’Do we have to worry about you contacting them?’’

’’Me, no. Like I said, I don’t plan to leave. Them? Depends. I can go for weeks without contacting them if I’m carrying out a hit, which is exactly what Shidō asked me to do before going to Metaverse.’’

’’On who?’’

’’All of your friends,’’ Gorō smiled gently and Kurusu’s frown deepened.

’’But I have no intention of doing that. You are the first, and the last small time criminal whose life I would actually take,’’ he continued.

’’Why, thank you.’’

Gorō swung his legs over the edge of the bed. His sight was spinning and blending to black for just for a moment.

’’You shouldn’t over exhaust yourself,’’ Kurusu warned.

’’I’m guessing I’m staying here for the time being.’’

’’Yes.’’

’’As I said, I’m taking the couch.’’ He felt bothered enough as it was.

’’We can always share,’’ Kurusu offered with a hint of amusement.

Gorō didn’t answer, as he felt he would get a headache at this rate.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you are wondering all the ō's instead of regular o's then I'll tell you my child how I despise that translation chose. And they aren't even constant with it! Somehow Mishima Yūki is Yuuki instead of Yuki? My blood boils.  
> ō and ū just mean it's pronounced as long, so oo or ou and uu are also correct.


	2. 23 days

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Now begins the actual social link. The first was just a prologue. Decided to split Akira’s and Akechi’s POV 50/50 so you could get a sense of what is going on both sides as it worked great in the first chapter.

It felt unusual how little Akechi would talk. When the morning came, he would only give his thanks to Boss with that artificial smile of his. Seeing him so docile at breakfast, after so much sass yesterday felt jarring to Akira.

’’Others will be here after school,’’ he informed.

The detective didn’t answer, he just stared at nothing in particular.

’’What’s on your mind? You've been quiet since yesterday,’’ Akira asked, testing the waters.

’’I’m baffled by how you still keep acting like this towards me?’’

’’Oh, do I have the great detective on his toes?’’

’’I’m serious. I tried to kill you, twice. Why would you still continue to keep up this charade of friendship?’’

Fair point, but treating him any different felt unnatural. Maybe he wanted to cherish what little trust they had was still left.

He wanted to believe that not everything Akechi had said was a lie.

No, he definitely hadn’t lied about Shidō and about his mother.

So Akira had to dig deeper to build on those nuggets of truths a new foundation for their shared trust.

’’And you tried to save me twice. I say we are even,’’ he settled on saying.

’’Even?’’ Akechi laughed. Not the manic kind, just one that lacked any energy.

Joker briefly wondered if he had even slept last night.

’’I’m only speaking for myself. Futaba and Haru are a whole different thing. Don’t expect them to forgive you so easily.’’

’’Forgive me? …You are so naive.’’

’’Then what about you?’’ Akira questioned.

’’…What?’’

’’You were going to save us, and sacrifice yourself.’’

Akechi fell silent for a moment.

’’And?’’

’’So, you are in no position to pass judgement when you tried to redeem yourself with the oldest trick in the book, Mr. I-wanted-to-be-a-superhero-once.’’

’’Shut up.’’

\---

Everyone had gathered together, and you could feel the tension in the air. The heavy dread. Morgana was kind enough to bring everyone up to speed on Akechi’s condition. Which was very much too good for comfort.

Going to the Palace or Mementos, and leaving Akechi unsupervised could mean trouble.

’’So… what’re we gonna do with Akechi?’’ Ryūji asked.

Said detective hadn’t talked the whole time the conversation took place. It was probably a good thing, since the others would not have received anything he might have said well.

’’We can’t leave him alone when we're going to Metaverse. He could report everything to Shidō. Splitting the party may be the wisest thing to do, so the back-up could keep an eye on him. It would be unthinkable to send a calling card in this situation. We need the whole party for that,’’ Makota noted.

’’I hacked Akechi’s phone, disabled the location and have been keeping track of the messages. No new calls or messages yet,’’ Futaba pointed out.

’’So we haven’t been discovered? Are they going to be suspicious if Akechi-kun won’t show up to school?’’ Ann worried.

The leader glanced at Akechi who looked like he wasn’t even listening, never mind answering.

’’Akechi was ordered to kill every member of the Phantom thieves. He said it would normally keep him busy for a while,’’ Akira spoke for him.

’’Damn it! They think they can kill us all just like that?! How screwed up can this get? Those bastards need a lesson,’’ Ryūji kicked the air in vain.

’’On the bright side, there is still plenty of time before the election. 23 days to be exact **.** We shouldn’t panic and do anything reckless,’’ Yūsuke noted.

’’…Should we be worried about the other people coming for our lives? What if Akechi-kun isn’t the only one?’’ Haru brought up a very reasonable concern.

This time Akira didn’t know the answer.

Despite how Akechi wasn't facing them, eyes only fixated on the wall, he spoke up:

’’Shidō is too careful about leaving traces. He wouldn’t send anyone other than me after you.’’

’’And that’s something you take pride in?’’ Haru challenged, but Akechi remained unfazed.

’’Good, we don’t gotta worry about that, at least.’’ Ryūji scratched his neck.

’’Is there any additional crucial details that we should be worried about?’’ Makoto questioned.

Akechi shook his head. 

Shidō was more dangerous than anything they'd gone up against yet. There's no way they'd think that it was going to be entirely safe. What they did was never without its own risks.

’’Let's disband for now. We can talk more via text messages, so we don’t have to worry about Akechi listening to us,’’ Akira offered, and everyone nodded in agreement.

When the others had left, Akira turned towards Akechi.

’’Looks like we're going to take turns babysitting you.’’

The detective didn’t take the bait.

\---

Their conversation was much more rapid through messages. Everyone was worried about Akira’s safety, and Ryūji even offered to spend the night for some extra man power. Akira, of course, was touched, but declined and pointed out that Morgana’s claws were not to be underestimated.

’’Morgana, would you like to sleep on top of Akechi? To keep him under your paws, so he won’t escape?’’ The leader of the group joked and Morgana’s tail swung from side to side at a fierce tempo.

’’No way! I can keep an eye on him like this just fine.’’

_’Morgana will take responsibility if Akechi escapes.’_ Akira typed.

’’Hey!’’ Morgana hissed.

_’Well, that's reassuring. I’m sure he'll do a great job.’_ Yūsuke replied earnestly.

’’See? At least one of you knows who to trust,’’ Morgana puffed out his chest.

_’I’m still nervous. Please stay safe, and don’t hesitate to call any of us over,’_ Ann worried.

’’Lady Ann…’’ Morgana whined heart-broken.

Akira chuckled.

_’Agreed. We don’t know how many lives Akechi has already taken. We should stay on our guard,’_ Makoto typed.

_’Akira-kun can decide when we're going to gather next time, and who's going to be left behind to keep an eye on Akechi,’_ Haru offered.

_’Will do,’_ Akira finished the conversation and turned to look at Akechi on the couch.

He preferred the detective screaming his heart out, with insults thrown in his way, just so he could know what was going on in his mind. The way the detective had withdrawn nearly immediately after waking up didn’t give Joker much of a chance to figure him out.

’’I haven’t heard you complain yet. It’s kind of uncanny.’’

Akechi didn’t seem to bother with him even in his thoughts, by the looks of it. The detective just kept his eyes on his hands resting on his lap.

Honestly, Akira was getting slightly unnerved. He supposed this is how he was when Akechi wasn't putting on the celebrity persona.

He'd seen glimpses of it, when he would come to drink coffee at Leblanc, and the detective ended up spacing out. But unlike then, he wasn’t apologizing, or laughing it off.

’’Shame you have a Persona. I would have been interested in what your Shadow might have to say,’’ Akira kept the conversation up, even if he was starting to feel like he was talking to himself more than anything.

’’So, you’re saying that I would have a Palace?’’ Akechi finally reacted.

’’Maybe, maybe not.’’

’’If I had, would you make me have a change of heart?’’

’’No. I think you need to go through it by yourself.’’

Akechi snorted.

Quietly, Akira called out to him.

’’What were you going to do after having Shidō fall from grace?’’

’’…What?’’ Akechi asked, seemingly only half-focused. At least he was meeting Joker’s eyes.

’’You said it yourself. How you would make him acknowledge you, and then, from what I gathered, make everyone else aware of the truth. But what about you? Were you going to turn yourself in?’’

’’…Yes. They would need someone to testify. I've been gathering evidence in secret. Hiding them. I made sure only Sae-san could find them.’’

So he had an ulterior motive to work with Sae Niijima in particular. Akira had wondered if Akechi was only faking his care for the prosecutor.

He really must have cared. Otherwise, why else would he be willing to leave his revenge in her hands.

’’After that?’’ Akira asked.

’’What about it?’’ the detective spat the words out, growing irritated.

’’After your revenge,’’ he specified.

Akechi didn’t answer.

And Akira could see it.

He has been living his life for revenge only. Everything he did was a build up for it.

He didn’t have any goals beyond that.

He didn’t **need** any goals beyond that.

’’…That’s why you could sacrifice yourself for us. You— You didn’t plan on living following your revenge to begin with.’’

Akira honestly didn’t know what to feel. Should he be terrified of such determination or sad. A small part of him felt admiration, even if it was clearly not well placed.

’’Well, do you feel like a genius now? You saved someone who's already as good as dead.’’

’’Akechi…’’

’’Don’t you fucking call me by my name!’’ Akechi shouted, rising to his feet.

The sudden loudness made Morgana jump in the air, fur standing up.

’’Everything would have gone perfectly, with or without you. I would be dead either way, with or without my revenge. Don’t you see? Revenge is the only thing keeping me alive in this shitty life.’’ Akechi let out a broken laugh.

Only an imitation of his break down at Shidō’s Palace.

Hysterical and desperate.

’’What do you want me to do now? Right my wrongs? Make amends to all the families who were left mourning?’’

More laughter. There wasn't any humor in it.

’’I have nothing. I never had _anything_ after—’’

He stopped.

Face twisting in despair as he finally faced Akira.

’’And you! You — oh, so perfect, kind, selfless, with caring friends, roof over your head — could never understand. I’m all alone. There would be no one left to mourn me. Only my _’’fans’’,_ burning their collected signatures and pictures of me. Shouting about how horrible I was to lie to everyone, only to be forgotten in a few days afterwards. There was never anything tying me to this world…’’ He was now on the verge of tears, his whole body shaking, but it seemed he couldn’t bring himself to do that.

He probably physically couldn’t anymore.

’’Nothing. I have absolutely nothing,’’ words like poison kept dripping from Akechi’s lips.

Self depreciating.

Akira wanted to say something, anything.

To say he was wrong, that **he** would have mourned. **He** would have kept holding onto that glove Akechi had given him, thinking of him. **He** would have lived in deep regret about how things could have been different.

But all that probably sounded too artificial to Akechi’s ears.

He hadn't— he _still_ didn’t believe that he could make amends. That he deserved it. Didn’t think that there would be people that'd still care about him.

’’It’s still not too late. We still have time until the deadline. And even after that. I won’t give up on you, Akechi,’’ he had probably said the wrong thing, because Akechi looked like he wanted to suffocate him on the spot.

To squish his neck until he couldn't breathe anymore.

But the distorted anger soon disappeared from Akechi’s eyes, leaving behind only a hollow shell.

But more than that, he looked tired. Just, so very tired.

And Akira couldn’t blame him.

The plan he had spent his whole life constructing — torn apart before him.

**Once unwavering Justice has become unsure of itself.**

**Its true form, shown as twisted.**

**But an uncertain path gives way for new possibilities.**

**It will become the wings that break thy chains.**

**Thou has acquired the power of Justice reversed, that will become the strength to help thou break free from already determined fate.**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Would you look at that angst. Love it. Seriously, I can’t see that Akechi would have had any other reason to live other than revenge. Maybe I’m projecting a little bit of me, as I basically live off the power of rage, and can say from experience, it works wonders.


	3. Insomnia

That night too, Gorō kept staring at the ceiling. An old attic with an separate heater at the center of the room. It was different from his flat, it was full of personality. Whether the Phantom thieves poster just above the couch, or the collection of plushies on Akira's work desk with scraps of iron wire and other tools.

He couldn’t compare.

At the corner of his vision Gorō saw Morgana move again. Dark fur merging to the darkness perfectly, but contrasted to the white sheets well enough to be visible. This time it moved itself to Kurusu’s legs.

_’’How can he stay asleep through all that,’’_ the detective pondered, as he was a very light sleeper.

He would be awakened by the smallest of noises, making every night it’s own struggle. The sound of someone upstairs turning on a tap or footsteps in the corridor. Yet he refused to use ear plugs because of a fear of not hearing if someone would try to unlock his door.

’’…Akechi, go to sleep already. I would like to keep my promise to Akira,’’ Morgana spoke voice drowsy.

It should be weird to hear a cat talk, yet Gorō found himself ignoring the thing.

’’Akechi?’’ The cat called and he turned his back to the thing.

Childish as it was, he really wasn’t in the mood to listen to a talking cat.

’’...Why do I have to listen to his suggestions…?’’ The thing sighs, Gorō can’t even bother to try to think how.

Cat’s don’t have the vocal cords to produce such noises. Maybe it speaks directly to a person's mind, or has different anatomy from a cat.

He nearly yelps when the thing jumped on top of his legs.

’’What do you want…?’’ Gorō questioned.

The paws carefully stepped over his legs and for a while Gorō mistakes that the thing left him alone, instead he hears the cat's voice behind him.

’’Just dare to turn over and I’ll bite.’’ Morgana then rolls into a small pile next to him, lightly touching his back to let him know he was there.

’’Not much of a threat,’’ Gorō found himself answering only a tad amused at the situation he found himself in.

’’Let me sleep…!’’ the cat hissed and he fell silent.

\---

Gorō woke up after only a few hours wearing clothes that Kurusu had lend him.

All that talk about Kurusu becoming Gorō’s stunt double only for things to wind up the exact opposite.

It was pathetic.

At least they were the same size, so he didn’t feel as humiliated as the situation could have been.

When the Boss called them to breakfast Gorō put up his polite act, even when he was quite sure the owner of Leblanc knew his true nature. It was only out of manners, and if he was to find anything good from this situation, it would be that he got to stay at this cafe.

Even if the Phantom thieves came to a unanimous decision to kill him here, it would be fine.

He felt nothing.

’’Haru asks if she could drop by? She wants to talk to you,’’ Kurusu speaks to him, but his head was just empty and eyelids heavy.

’’Alright.’’

When Haru Okumura came to visit Gorō felt nervous, which is an emotion he hadn’t felt in a very long time.

He remembered when he had first seen Shidō for the first time. He felt sheer disgust, rage and very paranoid that he would blow his cover.

No, this was a different kind of uneasiness, like the first time he was ordered to kill.

He had prepared the whole day before, yet his hand would unwillingly shake and he felt that he wasn’t ready at all. When he finally gathered his courage to go to the Metaverse and saw the target, he had to keep repeating the same mantra in his head.

_’’It’s for my revenge’’_ or _’’for mother’’_.

But even repeating those over and over wasn’t enough, so he had to think the opposite of killing them.

 _’’It’s not the real thing’’_ and _’’I’m killing only the cognitive version.’’_

Coping at it’s finest, Gorō would know.

He had to adapt or else he would break.

Sometimes Gorō wondered, if only he would have known, how you could make someone have a change of heart earlier.

Most likely he would have done that to Shidō and called it a day. See him suffer.

And he would have never had to give up on his morals,

or himself.

\---

’’What were father’s final moment’s like?’’ Okumura asks him.

_’’You could see it yourself. It was on TV,’’_ was Gorō’s automatic thought, but he knew it’s not what she meant.

’’…I shot him twice. Once to the heart, other to the head. Death should have come quickly.’’

’’How- how did you feel?’’ Okumura asked on edge.

’’Nothing. …I think I laughed,’’ Gorō recalled an hazy memory.

It was always a little hard to remember finer detail when he was using Loki.

’’You think? Nothing? Is taking a life so trivial to you?!’’ Okumura raised her voice, and Gorō couldn’t meet her eyes.

First time he had it was far from trivial. Yet as the time passed on they all blended together.

If he hadn’t kept evidence of every case, then some of them might as well never have happened in his mind.

’’Do you… regret it?’’ Okumura pressed.

’’I didn’t regret anything, as long as it brought me closer to my revenge.’’

’’Didn’t…? Does it mean you regret it now?’’ she noted.

He didn’t know what to regret anymore.

The fact he strayed away from his sense of justice killing people?

When he betrayed the Phantom thieves?

No, it was deeper than that.

He had been filled with regret ever since he couldn’t save his own mother.

’’…If you want to kill me, just do it. You still have my gun don’t you? You could use the very same gun that I used to kill your father to kill me, poetic justice,’’ Gorō offered instead.

He didn’t care anymore.

As long as he could die here in Leblanc and they would take down Shidō, he didn’t care.

Okumura took a deep breath and pulled said weapon from her bag.

’’Haru!?’’ Morgana shouted alarmed.

’’This is what you used?’’ she confirmed examining it in her hands.

’’Careful, your fingerprints are all over it now. Not that it matters. I always wore gloves so it doesn’t make good evidence for your father’s death,’’ Akechi made an off-hand comment.

She aimed.

She clearly wasn’t used to holding it compared to her preferred weapon in the Metaverse, but still kept her posture confident.

’’Haru, that’s-’’ Joker tried to calm her.

’’Please don’t interfere, Akira-kun. I know what I’m doing,’’ Okumura made him stand off to the side.

’’Any last words?’’ she asked.

’’None, except take down Shidō,’’ Gorō said.

’’Alright. Close your eyes.’’

Order felt weird to him, but he complied. Killing someone with their eyes on them must be harder.

There was a click and nothing.

’’Now you can open your eyes.’’

Gorō obeyed.

’’Now I have killed the murderer of my father, the one with the Black mask. Now only the Crow, that fought beside us, is left. Please make sure to not take anyone else’s life, so you won’t bring anyone such pain of loss that I felt ever again,’’ Okumura spoke, smiling sweetly.

’’Haru, you scared me for a second,’’ Morgana meowed in distress, tail hanging low.

’’I’m sorry Mona-chan…’’ her tone changed by the snap of a finger to an apologetic soft tone.

’’I never want to see you like ever again,’’ Morgana complained and Okumura picked the said cat up to soothe it.

’’Were you scared?’’ Kurusu asked him and Gorō shook his head.

’’No, I knew she wouldn’t kill me. Not wearing gloves and carrying a gun without its safety on, without mentioning the lack of regard for the place of murder.’’

’’You heard Akechi. Next time Haru, you have to be more prepared,’’ he called out.

’’I’ll keep that in mind,’’ Okumura spoke lightly.

’’Wait... What!? Haru? Akira? Please tell me you are only joking?’’ Morgana panicked.

\---

Third night at the Leblanc and Gorō still couldn’t sleep. He didn’t have the willpower to find a more comfortable position anymore. When he found himself counting blank spaces between the wood panels on the ceiling, he wasn’t sure if he was trying to stay awake or the opposite.

Morgana was resting on Kurusu’s chest. It made him think it must be hard to breathe with the extra weight on top of the other.

’’Can’t sleep?’’ This time it wasn’t the cat who spoke.

Gorō pretended not to hear that.

’’You know I just texted Futaba-’’

’’What?’’ the detective interrupted.

He wasn’t mentally prepared to face Sakura.

It had been hard enough when he had to feign ignorance, but now…

’’Got you talking,’’ the trickster hummed in satisfaction.

’’So you’re enjoy bringing me distress now?’’ Gorō cursed his own weakness, but directed the anger at Kurusu.

’’Sorry. Didn’t think you still had a conscience there.’’

’’Sakura-san is… different.’’

’’Don’t worry, she won’t threaten your life. Although your browser history could be leaked for all to see.’’

_And that should bring comfort to him, how?_

’’No. That isn’t it…’’

’’What is it then?’’

Gorō couldn’t put it into words. No, he absolutely could, but he didn’t remember it as clearly. Mixed images of his own imagination and reality was a blurry mess, and he felt sick to his stomach just by thinking about it.

**Wakaba Isshiki was his first target.**

’’If you don’t want to tell, that’s fine. But if you’re going to stay up any more nights, I’ll have Takemi-san prescribe some very special sleeping pills-’’ Kurusu began, but Gorō countered.

’’I already have a prescription for a one.’’

’’Oh, okay,’’ the other was taken back. ’’You could have told me about it.’’

He absolutely could have, but he felt vulnerable enough as it was, and while wallowing in misery was not preferred, he still had chosen it over losing his facade. Yet it became slowly unbearable, and whatever pride Gorō still had left didn’t matter if he couldn’t even have coherent thoughts anymore.

’’I felt like I was in no position to demand anything.’’

’’Okay. Just- Anything important you’re not telling me that could be fixed with just a trip to a store?’’

_He really didn’t want to share the knowledge if necessary._

’’You don’t have to answer. Tomorrow we are going shopping.’’ The other boy took the hint.

Gorō squinted his eyes towards Kurusu’s form in the darkness.

’’You, who is supposed to be dead, roaming around with their supposed killer.’’

’’Hey, I can’t pick a prescription for you and I can’t let you go alone.’’

_''Fair enough_ , _''_ Gorō thought.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Could you believe me if I said I wrote all these chapters in under a week? Because I did.
> 
> And no, Haru has not forgiven Akechi. She got her own revenge you could say.
> 
> Should I tag this fic with depression? Akechi is acting kinda self-destructive here...
> 
> Also I find it stupid how Akechi got screwed from the very beginning. He didn’t know how to make someone have a change of heart, nor he had a guide like Morgana, or any allies. I guess that’s what makes it so unfair, and emotional, but I rather have a story with a meta-narrative that actually follows it’s message about breaking free by letting people redeem themselves. If Persona 4's main bad guy gets to walk free with similar narrative, I see no reason to write Akechi off.


	4. A mission

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Updated some tags, no major trigger warnings except referenced domestic abuse. If you were here before this chapter was uploaded, then I suggest you look through them.

Akira blamed himself for not noticing sooner how Akechi was neglecting himself.

Especially when the other had, himself, admitted that he didn’t have a plan after revenge. Or possibly intend to even live.

It should have raised red flags of some kind, but Akira was so busy in trying to put this new Akechi, the one he was learning about, together with his image of him from before.

Good thing, Akechi could still function surprisingly well even with his lack of sleep.

Bad thing, he was really snappy as aforementioned lack of sleep.

’’Why are all your clothes so loose? And why so many hoodies?’’ he complained at the smallest of things.

Getting Akechi to wear his clothes was a treat itself.

Him complaining about it was another small victory.

They had just taken the train to Kichijōji and the detective walked with little wobble in his steps. Kurusu knew the slightly drunk state one arrives when going too long for a little to no sleep.

Akira was glad he had Morgana to keep him from staying up to the late hours.

’’Well for one they're comfy, second having hoodies in this situation comes really handy. Easy to just not stand out, unlike a certain detective with his trendy clothes,’’ he pointed out.

He wondered if he could find where Akechi brought his clothes while they were out.

’’Well _excuse me_ for having taste, when you have none,’’ Akechi bit back.

’’No offence taken.’’

The other rolled his eyes in annoyance.

’’I don’t also get why you wear those glasses. You don't need them and I doubt you wear them for some weird attempt at being fashionable,’’ Akechi noted and Akira was slightly taken back by the change of topic.

’’Oh, as expected, the ace detective strikes again. What gave it away?’’

’’Your glasses don’t distort, even a little bit. At nights, when you're without them, you haven’t squinted once nor had to put them on once you have taken them off.’’

Akechi sure had an eye for details, but he really shouldn’t be surprised at this point.

’’It could be just very small short or farsightedness,’’ Akira challenged.

’’And the hardest evidence I have is when you made me wear them for disguise. I didn’t notice a difference.’’

’’Okay, you got me.’’

He would still lose to Akechi in mind games. Guess he needed to plan much farther ahead, before Akira could deceive him again.

’’Why do you even wear them?’’ the detective pried.

’’Is this an interrogation?’’ He smirked in response.

’’I have been nothing but cooperative these few days, if you can’t tell me as much, I’m doubting your character,’’ Akechi pointed out.

That blow hurt Akira quite a bit.

It wasn’t as if he and the others could leave Akechi to fend for himself, but the lack of privacy was the cost of that.

The detective was and had been very open on the outside, but was in actuality really reserved. Never the one to tell too much that could be used against him. Even if Akira knew very personal details about other boy’s life, he hadn’t been given details like names or places. He didn’t even know where Akechi lived.

So him, even on some level, admitting he was trying or doing things out of his comfort-zone, made Akira feel bad. He was easily influenced by other people.

’’I just- It’s stupid, and nothing special,’’ Akira tried to make light of it.

’’Just spit it out you coward.’’ Akechi was intrigued now, so he wouldn’t let it go until he heard the answer.

’’…I don’t stand out as much.’’

’’That’s your reason?’’ Akechi actually seemed confused.

’’I told you it’s stupid. It’s the same reason why I stand little crouched, so I wouldn’t stand so tall,’’ he elaborated trying to prove his word, but inevitably digging himself a deeper hole.

’’I thought it was just because you carried that cat around.’’

’’Hey! I’m not that heavy!’’ Morgana argued and leaned out of his bag to hover on Akira’s shoulder.

’’No, no… I just. Maybe let’s talk about this at Leblanc okay?’’ He felt too self-conscious at the moment.

He could see a small spark in Akechi’s eyes again. The same glint when they were competing about small things.

Now they were going to one up each other at secrets?

At least the detective felt a little more energetic again.

\---

Despite complaining about Akira’s choice in clothes Akechi didn’t buy anything but essentials. Maybe he secretly liked being more casual?

For what Akira could see of the sleeping pills, that had been their primary goal, they were really strong. He had to keep his eyes out so as to not get spiked curry tonight.

Other slightly concerning things that Akechi had bought were painkillers, medical tape and such. He didn’t know if the other had other medical conditions, but Akira felt that if the other hadn’t shared, then he didn’t want to nor would tell.

The detective had also brought a lot of cosmetics and Akira felt just a little relieved that Akechi wasn’t naturally so pretty.

His heart just couldn’t take it.

When they were on their way to Kichijōji’s station, Akira couldn’t help but give a glance at the Velvet room’s door as they passed by.

’’Is there something there Kurusu-kun?’’

’’Huh? Nothing is ther- Wait, can you see something?’’ Akira fixed his glasses in wonder to see Akechi staring at the direction of the lone blue door.

’’It might be my imagination but I can faintly see… butterflies? No, it must be just the trick of the light. I’m more than happy to go to sleep after this,’’ Akechi rubbed his forehead like the sight strained his eyes.

Akira felt weird, but it would make sense. Akechi was like him, he could wield multiple Personas. So he could have his own Velvet room that he’s not aware of.

_He should ask when they would be alone._

\---

Akechi skipped curry for tonight and went straight to sleep when they got back home. Morgana was keeping an eye on him while Akira dined downstairs with Sōjirō.

’’How's that boy doing? He still seems to enjoy the cafe, but I feel like he’s less talkative. Could be just my imagination,’’ Sōjirō noted.

’’He’s- I honestly don’t know. He didn’t tell me he had prescribed medicine until yesterday and wasn’t sleeping because of it.’’

What if Akira hadn’t brought it up by accident? Would Akechi have said nothing and just kept it to himself?

What more important things could he be keeping that cause him pain?

Akira couldn’t even guess and it concerned him deeply.

’’Well, glad he told you that even if a bit late,’’ Sōjirō seemed unworried which calmed Akira’s racing mind a little.

’’Sōjirō… how did you handle Futaba at her weakest? When to not over step and when to press on? How do you help someone who won't, or doesn’t know, how to ask for it?’’ Akira decided to turn to his closest father figure for advice.

’’That’s… a difficult question. And yet you guys saved Futaba on your own, treating her better than I could,’’ the older man admitted powerless.

’’But we can’t change Akechi’s heart, that’s the thing. That’s why I’m asking you.’’

And even if he could, he wasn’t sure that it would be the correct choice. Like with Mismima or Niijima Sae.

’’Ah, well…’’ Sōjirō mumbled and stroked his beard in contemplation.

’’Sometimes just giving them the very basics helps. Food, place to sleep and a bath. A safe place to call a home and some space when they ask for it, and so forward. From what I have gathered from Akechi, he too has had a hard time with finding those basics, just like Futaba. He will come around on his own terms. Don’t rush things,’’ he offered.

’’Thanks Sōjirō. I appreciate the advice,’’ Akira felt a little more self-assured, now that he knew that he wasn’t making things actively more worse at least.

’’Come on kid, stop it. Us adults should be taking care of these things and not let these kinds of things happen in the first place. Even more not having you to glue together pieces broken by us,’’ he laughed, but then snarled. ’’I just can’t believe, why do these kids get taken to the worse kinds of foster homes… Afraid I can’t be much help to Akechi.’’

’’You’re doing more than enough, seriously. I’m sure Futaba and Akechi would agree. Ask them yourself,’’ Akira didn’t want to be too corny by saying that Sōjirō was a better parent than his own by a long shot.

He was also positive that Akechi appreciated Boss more than him at this point. Akira knew he could be annoying.

Sōjirō rubbed his neck in embarrassment. 

’’Look at you cheering me on. Maybe you should become an open foster home once you’re an adult.’’

’’That’s sappy Sōjirō. I don’t even want to think that far into the future,’’ Akira couldn’t even see his graduation ceremony in his mind.

’’You’ll see kid. Time passes quickly, but whatever you end up doing, I’m sure it’ll be a bright future for you,’’ he encouraged with a tease.

\---

It was a little weird for Akira to awaken before Akechi. The other, so far, had been the first to awake and would have already made the makeshift bed back to the couch looking all sharp. 

Now he had been in a deep sleep since last evening, but Akira still felt anxious on Akechi’s behalf. For now he left Morgana with him and went downstairs.

As he was in the middle of eating breakfast, his phone buzzed with a new message.

_’Akechi got a message from_ _Shidō. Asked how far he was with the targets,’_ Futaba’s message read, and because she was already awake this was urgent or she had pulled an all-nighter.

Akira wondered for a moment if he should awake Akechi, but decided against it. He needed to catch up on his lost sleep.

_’Crap. Should we answer?’_ Ryūji asked.

_’No need to panic. Didn’t Akechi-kun say we still have time until they get suspicious?’_ Makoto reminded.

_’He could be lying. What are we going to do?’_ Ann joined.

_’I’ll ask Akechi when he wakes up,’_ Akira tried to calm everyone down.

_’The hell man? You letting him sleep at the time like this???’_ Ryūji furiously typed.

_’Pictures plz! They’ll be worth a ton if you get the angle right!!!’_ Futaba demanded.

_’I’m also interested, for an artistic reference,’_ Yūsuke joined.

_’Will do.’_ Akira smirked to himself and began his quest.

The conversation went on without him.

_’The hell!? Why’d you want pictures of Akechi?’_ Ryūji felt betrayed.

_’For the money!’_

_’Artistic value.’_

_’Wouldn’t it also be good for blackmail material? We could get back at Akechi!’_ Futaba seemed ecstatic.

Akira felt more nervous than when he was sneaking up to a shadow. He had muted his phone and brought the camera mode on.

Morgana gave him a confused look, but Akira theatrically mimed him to stay quiet. Mona seemed to understand and his tail made circles from side to side intrigued.

Akira sneaked to the couch trying his best not to step on any creaking floor plates. Never had he thought he would have to sneak into his own room, or well, attic, like this.

The detective had made a cocoon out of the small blanket he had been given, which was incredibly adorable to Akira’s eyes. He must be a restless sleeper.

Akira circled around the cocoon to find an opening. Finally he gave in and decided to risk it and pulled the covers until he uncovered Akechi’s messy hair. And Akira thought he had a bedhead.

_’*Attached picture*_ _He's completely out cold,’_ he commented.

_’LMAOL! I don’t know if fans want this, but trolls definitely do. Good job Joker! You gained a new skill tree!’_ Futaba seemed satisfied.

_’The shape of the sheets is like a cocoon. Indeed. Like a moth ready to break free! I thank you Akira, I feel inspired,’_ Yūsuke also seemed fond of the chaotic photo.

His job done and Akechi's fluffy hair imprinted to memory, Akira retreated unnoticed back to the cafe.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It was a different kind of mission than you might have expected?  
> Gotta love good dad Sōjirō. These kids need a reliable parental figure like him in their life.


	5. Crumbling

Gorō woke up to something furry tickling his nose.

He felt like shit.

Beginning of a headache pounded the sides of his head from too much sleep left him disoriented.

When he cracked his eyes open to see, it was filled with black fur.

’’Finally, you woke up. Akira wanted you to sleep as much as you want, but I think enough is enough. It’ll be soon time for lunch,’’ Morgana’s high voice hurt his ears.

He slowly blinked and when his eyes finally focused, he determined that Morgana’s tail had been the cause of what awoke him.

’’Come, let’s go,’’ Morgana impatiently repeated and planted his paw to Gorō’s cheek.

Still drowsy, Gorō vaguely understood he had to eat something for the rest of the side effects to go away.

Morgana climbed up his back, so its front paws were balancing on top of Akechi’s head. He couldn’t even be bothered to ask the thing to kindly get off, as focusing on anything took too much effort.

Gorō descended the stairs with his other hand holding the wall for support.

He reminded himself that in the future he would have to explain to Kurusu that he would sleep to the end of all humanity if he wasn’t woken up when he used said medicine. -Or he should just buy an alarm clock now that he doesn't have his phone. He didn’t want to be left under the Joker’s mercy.

’’Morning sleepy head. I saved some curry from last night,’’ Kurusu greeted and covered his mouth like he was holding back a laugh.

Gorō couldn’t visualize what he might have looked after what must have been at least 14 hours of sleep.

’’What time is it?’’

Kurusu fished his phone from his pocket.

’’Soon 3 pm.’’

Akechi rolled his eyes. No dice about closing his eyes, if he didn’t want to wake up at 1 am.

’’Futaba said, you got a message from Shidō. Said to report on your progress with the… hits,’’ Kurusu was as uncomfortable as ever with Gorō’s past occupation.

_Why does he still keep him under the same roof then?_

’’Lend me your phone. I’ll give Sakura-san instructions.’’

The leader complied and he soon gave the phone back without sending the message, so Kurusu could verify it.

_’Hello. Akechi here. Send this after 3 to 4 days if another message hasn’t come in by that period of time. If another message comes, send this as a reply right away._

\- _The targets are more careful now that their leader has died. They move in groups of at least 3 people. I’ll need time to separate them, so when one dies, the others won’t be alarmed and go into hiding. At worst they could rely on the few police forces not under our thumb, and we won’t want that now wouldn’t we?_ _I know you’re impatient, but to leave no traces and to make sure no one escapes I need more time. You are in the right, and the goal you seek is right in front of you. Just let me handle everything for you.’_

Kurusu read the message and was impressed.

’’You came up with a lie this fast?’’

’’You have to think on your feet. If you don’t, you’ll die. It’s not that hard, just stroke their egos enough and they'll be gullible until you betray them,’’ he spoke his mind, or at least that’s what Gorō had thought.

The irony that he was the one lead on the whole time, ready to be disposed off as soon as he wasn’t needed. He was such a fool.

’’And that’s how I know you’re not going to betray us now. I have not heard even one positive thing from you this whole week.’’ Kurusu nodded to himself.

’’Don’t test your luck,’’ Gorō warned, but felt the side of his mouth turning upwards.

**_The twisted Justice is becoming aware of itself._ **

**_It has taken notice of the binds that have led them astray from their initial goal._ **

**_Lost, it is now in search of a new path._ **

**_Yet are their eyes blighted, and in a need of a guide._ **

**_Once you became their light, their strength will open a new path for the both of you._ **

\---

The fact that Sōjirō Sakura willingly kept his whole cafe closed losing whatever little income they had, just because someone might see Kurusu who was presumed dead, was illogical.

Gorō had a hard time understanding such dedication, or a sense of responsibility to someone who wasn’t even their own child.

He sure as hell hadn’t been treated like that back in his foster homes.

The best ones so far had treated him with indifference and let him fend for himself. They were the one’s Gorō ended up staying with.

He suddenly realized he was lucky he had paid the rent before getting caught in all this, not that he actually had anything to lose in his house. His multiple foster homes were sure to rob him of anything that could be sold with a decent price, and throw away anything that had personal value to him.

Gorō still wondered if the latter was done with the purpose of hurting him or by accident.

_Why did he even bother to think about intent?_

_The end result was still the same._

’’Akechi?’’ Kurusu called and Gorō very gracefully let the Phantom thieves' leader have his attention.

’’Yes?’’

’’Can you keep watch here, while I’ll help Sōjirō to prepare dinner?’’

’’Do you think I have anything better I could be doing?’’

Keeping an eye on a laundry machine was nothing that unusual from his mundane life.

’’Planning our death in excruciating detail?’’ Kurusu joked.

’’Don’t worry, your’s is already planned. I don’t care for the others,’’ he yawned unwillingly. Keeping up a brave face was taking its toll on him really quickly now that he was as tired as he was.

’’Great! I’ll leave you to it then. Mona, keep an eye on him,’’ Kurusu left the laundry house with a quick wave.

’’Sheesh! You're too carefree Akira!’’ Morgana meowed in dismay.

’’Just trusting a great companion!’’ the other shouted from the street.

Morgana’s ear’s peaked at that.

’’Now you're under my watch, you better behave.’’ The cat sat on the ground before Gorō like it had been placed on the highest of pedestals.

He left the creature in it’s own delusions and his eyes instead followed the rolling of the clothes in the laundry machine. He was getting dizzy.

Actually he had felt weird after they got back from Kichijōji.

Like he was on the verge of seeing something, but wasn’t.

He also remembered his dreams including wandering in a space outside of Metaverse, but not in this real world. Instead, somewhere in between those realities or a completely separate world.

Kurusu was jogging back to them not even a minute after.

’’I guess Sōjirō didn’t want help. Let’s leave the laundry watching to Morgana and go to the bathhouse in the meantime.’’

’’Why me?!’’ The cat protested.

\---

After dinner Gorō was ready to crash only for Futaba Sakura to come through the cafe’s door.

’’Sōjirō! You're taking too long-’’ her eyes linked with Akechi's and she quickly hid behind Kurusu.

’’Hm, what is it Futaba? I thought you were getting better with new people,’’ Boss noted.

’’Th-That and this are completely different! Like an open world game and a linear one. The approach is totally different!’’

’’As usual I don’t know what you're talking about,’’ Boss sighed.

’’I don’t mind. I’m a bother as it already is. I’ll be upstairs,’’ Gorō announced leaving his seat hoping his reaction wasn’t too obvious.

’’No-! I mean-! Come on, Futaba! It’s just a bed haired pretty boy. A moth. A low level villain you already defeated and could join your party with this side quest,’’ she encouraged herself.

The last sentence made some sense to Akechi, but everything else flew over his head.

_A moth?_

’’A-Akira! You can’t leave, okay? If I don’t have my key item, this task will be impossible!’’ Sakura clung to Akira’s elbow for support.

’’Alright, take deep breaths. Akechi go ahead. We will join you shortly,’’ Kurusu gave him a reassuring smile.

Gorō nod and Morgana followed at his feet.

Once upstairs and out of their sight, (he didn’t include the cat,) he hid his face with his hands.

’’Akechi?’’ Morgana called.

If only he could rip his face off like the masks in Metaverse.

His fake smile couldn’t stop twitching.

Was it finally broken?

Did he- was Loki’s influence fading?

No. It must be because Sakura appeared at random when he wasn’t prepared.

He also was just tired.

Yes.

Just tired.

After calming himself, he covered his mouth and nose with his hands and pressed hard, until he felt it hard to breath.

It had helped to relax his tense face at least, maybe a little bit of his nerves also.

And his breathing.

When had it become so quick?

He wasn’t prepared to have a similar conversation like the one he had with Okumura.

And this was different.

He really didn’t think he could-

Gorō heard the footsteps ascending.

He fixed his hair trying his best to appear normal, like he hadn’t just nearly had a panic attack.

Morgana was circling around his legs.

He didn’t know if the cat was trying to comfort or torment him, but either way it helped to distract him from the loud buzzing in his head.

’’Y-Yo, Akechi! I challenge you to a round of Smash Bros! The original! Not the new ones!’’ Sakura announced.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So Morgana is a therapy cat now.
> 
> I went and started to write Morgana and Akechi friendship? I don’t know how that happened, as I let the characters write themselves with a really vague idea of the whole picture.
> 
> Also the social link won't proceed in ''ranks'' so there won't be 10 ranks. The said text will change as Akechi and Akira become closer as you might have noticed.


	6. Not a competition

It was highly amusing to Akira to see Akechi being absolutely dominated at a video game. Whatever they had played from billiards to darts he always seemed to have an upper hand, but in video games, he was at the clear disadvantage. Not to mention his opponent was Futaba, who could pull amazing combos incredibly fast, so there was no chance at blocking.

’’I win!’’ Futaba shouted for the fifth time and Akira gave her a high five.

She seemed much more relaxed now.

Looking at Akechi's way, Akira was somewhat taken back by how Morgana was brushing against his leg. The detective himself looked more mellower, or it could be the public speaking persona just taking him over resulting to this image.

Just a mirage.

A fake.

’’I couldn’t participate when we fought against Akechi, so now I actually feel like I have won,’’ Futaba rose to her feet and turned towards Akechi. ’’Y-You have lost! There is no denying it!’’

Akechi just watched confused.

’’Do you… want me to deny it?’’

’’No! There is no wriggling out of this! Morgana and Akira can testify that,’’ she grinned mischievous as ever.

’’Yeah, just admit you lost to Futaba and she’ll stop,’’ Akira advised, her good mood rubbing on him.

’’…I lost,’’ Akechi repeated and he looked like a kicked puppy.

Akira hoped he could have taken a picture of that moment.

Futaba laughed loudly.

’’I’m unstoppable! I think I gained a level,’’ she chanted as she danced around.

Akira ruffled her hair affectionately.

’’I bet you got two.’’

’’You think so? It must be true then,’’ Futaba turned on her heel ready to leave. ’’I’ll go before Sōjirō gets worried.’’

’’I’ll walk you,’’ Akira offered and he didn’t hear Morgana object.

\---

’’I felt so nervous, but now I feel like I could give him orders, just like the time when he was with us as Crow!’’ Futaba walked with a bounce in her step. Akira had last seen her this happy, when she successfully completed her wish list.

’’I believe you can. You already got him repeating what you wanted to hear,’’ Akira pointed out, proud of her boosted confidence.

’’No, no, no! You were the one to tell him what to say. I gotta say, you have trained him well,’’ she teased.

’’Is Akechi my pet crow?’’ Akira wondered how Futaba interpreted their relationship.

’’Yeah! You know, a summon you can bring to fight, but only once. We have to recruit him if we're to bring him to an actual fight like in Mementos,’’ Futaba poked at his side.

_Unique way to look at them._

’’Alright. I’ll try to work on that,’’ he promised.

’’Great,’’ she hopped to the Sakura family apartment's doorstep.

Her stamina was slowly rising, and Akira wondered when Ann and Ryūji would caght the wind of it and would drag her to the gym with them.

’’Goodnight Akira!’’

’’Goodnight.’’

\---

When Akira came back Akechi was on the couch pretending to be asleep. Lights were still on and Morgana was watching over him from the work desk.

’’Is something up? Akechi? Morgana?’’ he questioned.

Akechi, as expected, didn’t answer and instead retreated more inside his blanket.

It was weird that Morgana wasn’t responding either. Maybe he would tell when they were alone, but that was a bit difficult considering the situation.

Akira turned the lights off and got ready for bed.

Yet with the heavy air around them he felt it next to impossible to fall asleep.

’’Are you awake Akechi?’’ he questioned.

The silence was really getting to him. Like the quiet before the storm, except it was Akechi’s still unpredictable mood swings. Exchanging words while he still didn’t know where to not thread felt like walking on a minefield.

’’What do you think?’’

Akira breathed relieved at the rude answer.

’’I'm thinking about you?’’

’’…Attic trash,’’ Akechi mumbled.

’’So are you now.’’

Akira turned over so he could face towards Akechi while speaking.

’’So what happened there?’’

Akechi didn’t speak, and neither did Morgana who was now sleeping soundly at Akechi’s feet.

’’Well, you and Mona sure have gotten close. I’m a little jeal-’’

’’Why don’t you want stand out?’’ Akechi interrupted and Akira felt like he had just been stabbed with an icicle to the chest. Cold, burning and in pain.

’’Sorry?’’ he repeated.

’’We're at Leblanc now. You said you would tell me here,’’ Akechi’s face emerged from within the blanket.

’’Oh, um,’’ Akira stumbled. He should have known a detective wouldn’t let a mystery remain unsolved.

Yet he felt a little giddy that the other had remembered such a minor detail.

’’I once thought I had to blend in. Someone who shouldn’t be noticed,’’ he confessed.

’’Why?’’ Akechi asked and Akira quietly laughed.

_Was he actually interested?_

’’Remember when you said we are alike?’’

’’…I now know that isn’t true,’’ Akechi whispered, but Akira waved his finger from side to side dramatically.

’’Untrue. …Well. My home is not as bad as your’s or any of my friends-’’

Now the detective finally turned to face him.

Encouraged Akira began to pour his soul out.

’’Simply put my family is strict. And I mean strict. Everyone of my friends would be evaluated and if they were not up to some made up standard, I couldn’t spend my time with them. Not that I never could have had many friends as my free time was determined by schedule. You get the idea.

If I tried to fight against it in any way I would get punished. Locked and left to repent to our basement, sometimes when I was particularly ’’bad’’, they wouldn’t feed me. You know, the usual.

So I felt myself becoming someone who didn’t have a mind of my own. Everything was already predetermined by my parents, so why fight it? I would go to school, then home, then study and that was my life. And then when Shidō accused me and I got trialed, they just… Gave up on me.

They sent me here, so I wouldn’t be their problem.

Just once I decided to act of my own free will and it turned like this.

So I thought that’s fine. Stopped trying.

Well, as you saw my wardrobe I gave up quite a while ago. I really didn’t get to spend any time outside, so all my clothes are, kinda, just what I felt comfortable wearing,’’ Akira suddenly became very conscious of how much he was talking, and how Akechi hadn’t spoken the whole time. 

Wave of insecurity passed him.

’’Sorry, I’m rambling. The point is I really tried to blend in and it still back fired. Well, the good thing about all this I got to meet you and other Phantom thieves. Makes my worries feel insignificant in comparison,’’ Akira forced a lighthearted tone, but inside his mind he kept screaming.

His worst fears surfaced of how he would suffer another abandonment. Not deemed enough for not reaching someone’s expectations.

Akechi thought of him highly, Akira was aware of that, and he was letting him down surely. Showing how pathetic he really was.

’’So… You haven’t told this to anyone else?’’ Akechi caught on.

’’Well. You’re the first one to ask. And as I said, it’s not that bad.

They probably don’t even consider me to be worthy of being their child. They'll probably leave me to Sōjirō even when my probation period ends,’’ he tried to prepare for the inevitable disappointment in him that Akechi would make known.

’’…kindhearted fool,’’ the other's speech was inaudible as he turned away from Akira.

’’Sorry, I didn’t quite catch that Akechi.’’

’’This isn't a competition of who’s had it the worse. You shouldn’t feel ashamed when talking about yourself for a change, instead of tearing up other people’s wounds,’’ Akechi said louder.

Akira’s eyes light up, his fast heartbeat slowing down.

Not a rejection,

but an encouragement for him to open up.

’’Are you… saying something nice to me?’’

’’Your bar of being ’’nice’’ is clearly too low.’’

’’So, say something more nicer to me then.’’

’’Shut up, and go to sleep already.’’

**_A border has been crossed with the Fool._ **

_**The misguided Justice realizing its potential.** _

**_A new beginning has left both sides to worn-out._ **

**_Yet thy combined strength shall transform to a power to resist the already determined fate._ **

**_May the power of reversed Justice guide thou path._ **

****

\---

In the morning Akira felt a bubbly happy feeling warming itself inside his gut. He felt closer to Akechi thanks to their late night conversation.

Drinking coffee together by the cafe's counter brought him a different joy from when they had done so just a few weeks ago. No more trying to see who could be faster at stabbing another to the back.

’’What are you smiling about? It’s disturbing,’’ Akechi spoke vaguely unsettled.

’’It’s nothing. Just a picture that Futaba will probably spread once she gets the energy to do so,’’ Akira covered the true cause for his behavior.

’’…What picture?’’

’’Here you go,’’ Akira pulled out his phone to show the picture he had taken yesterday, and realized too late that he would bring Akechi’s rage upon him.

But it was satisfying to see how slowly a soft blush rose to the detective's cheeks.

_Adorable._

’’You took this?’’

’’No, Morgana did,’’ Akira tried and failed.

’’Don’t lie! My paws are too big. I can’t touch those keys,’’ Morgana’s fur stood up with the protest.

’’But you watched me take it,’’ Akira reminded.

’’…Delete it,’’ Akechi spoke with a dangerously low tone.

’’I can, but I sent it to group chat already.’’ A low excuse from Akira just not wanting to delete it.

’’You’re the worst kind of jerk,’’ the other seemed to settle on as Sōjirō was still in their presence.

Boss didn’t seem to mind their bickering and was concentrating on the TV. 

Akira should probably use Akechi’s desire to keep up appearances to his advantage.

’’Come on. Read what everyone had to say,’’ he offered his phone and hoped Akechi wouldn’t ’’accidentally’’ break it.

Akechi skimmed the messages trying to keep a straight face, but failing miserably. His mouth hung open for just a moment.

’’Sakamoto-kun thinks I’m… cute?’’ he read and Akira was nodding his head furiously in agreement.

’’Yeah, and right away got roasted by all of us. I thought his anger towards you was twisted from something. Secretly he probably wants your looks and is jealous of your popularity, but knows he can’t pull it off. He behaved the same towards Yūsuke for a while too,’’ he analysed.

’’Did he also act that way towards you?’’ Akechi asked and Akira smirked.

’’You’re saying I’m good looking?’’

’’You’re impossible. If possible I don’t want to see your face ever again.’’

’’You mean my pretty face?’’

’’Leave it already.’’

’’Okay. So, you want some free time without me?’’

Akechi stared at him with pure disbelief.

’’What’s the catch?’’

’’You behave while I and the others go to Mementos.’’

Akechi took a long sip from his coffee.

’’Fine…’’ 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I played the Royal version and damn was Ryūji jelly of Akechi right from the get go. Wanted to write it in there because it’s hilarious.
> 
> Here begins also my character study of Persona 5 protagonist. Used as a reference his past; how he was flung to a family friend he never even had met, and how Akechi spoke how they were similar. Of course I interpreter that as shared trauma, because there doesn't exist a Phantom thief without some kind of trauma.
> 
> Akira has a bad case imposter syndrome, so don't believe his casual talk about his own experiences.


	7. Pity

Gorō was left at Leblanc when Joker, Fox, Noir and Oracle were off to Mementos, which left him alone with the rest of the gang. He was a little taken back that Morgana had wanted to stay behind with him.

Maybe the cat just took this babysitting job seriously?

It still felt a little odd to Gorō how the cat would sit by his side. Not that he cared, but he had thought the cat couldn’t stand him with how much he had complained before.

Takamaki, Sakamoto and Niijima were all minding their own business, or so they pretended.

He got mistrustful glances from Sakamoto whether he even shifted the weight between his legs. Niijima and Takamaki had their backs turned to him and were only pretending to have small talk. The conversation was filled with too long pauses and went around in circles tad too many times for it to be natural.

Gorō knew it was because of him.

But honestly he felt they were giving him too much credit here. In Metaverse the situation might have been different, but here he was powerless.

Just a high-school student like them.

No way could he over-power Niijima who knew aikidō, or Sakamoto with his stamina gained from doing track. If Takamaki was alone then maybe, but he was sure that Morgana would claw him alive before he could even try anything.

The whole situation was too tense and maybe because of Kurusu’s influence, Gorō felt like he had to break the ice.

’’So you think I’m cute Sakamoto-kun?’’

Said boy nearly managed to fall from his seat just with those words.

’’Wh-What the hell? Where- Who told you that?’’

’’Akira showed me his phone. Something about how I shouldn’t be so cute when being a freaking villain?’’ he quoted from memory.

’’Well-’’

’’You shouldn’t deny it Ryūji-kun. We all have seen it,’’ Makoto interrupted.

’’Hey-! Come on! This could be some kind o’ Akechi’s plot to let our guard down!’’

Gorō kinda wanted to play along with that idea now. At least he would be entertained.

’’Well if it is, you already fell for it Ryūji,’’ Takamaki noted.

Sakamoto fumed around the attic and this time no one was trying to hide how uncomfortable they felt.

Gorō was used to this mistrust and would like to think it didn’t affect him, but the mood was too contagious so he would rather lessen it if he could. Yet anything said by him would result in backlash.

Honestly he would rather have Akira making a clown of himself or him than this.

He mentally cringed at the trail of thought that he was close to thinking he _missed_ the other boy's presence while he was _living_ with him.

Just how lonely was he? Just like a dog without its owner?

’’Akechi has been with Akira and me to Kichijōji without trying anything. He has had plenty of chances to escape, but he hasn’t taken any of them,’’ Morgana took a stand in front of him.

The detective didn’t know how to handle Mona vouching for him. 

’’I’ll trust Morgana’s judgement, but at the same time I would like to put your trust in Akechi to the test,’’ Niijima rose from her seat and walked to him, holding something in her grasp.

’’What is it Niijima-san?’’ Gorō questioned.

’’I had brought these handcuffs, just in case. I have tested out a few moves on how to use them to my advantage when doing aikidō. I hope you don’t mind,’’ she hung cuffs in front of her.

Gorō was interested where and for what purpose she had bought them, but refrained from asking.

’’As long as you don’t use those moves on me, I’m quite fine being cuffed.’’ He made his best smile.

’’As long as you don’t try to escape,’’ Niijima answered unwavering.

Gorō could respect that unyielding nature, the same as Sae-san.

He nodded and offered his hands.

Niijima stared at him down for a while before she shook her head.

’’I think this is more than enough.’’

’’Makoto-senpai?’’ Takamaki asked confused.

’’He saved us and Joker at the Metaverse. And I talked to Haru, and she said she believed that Akechi is trying to turn over a new leaf. 

And I personally think he doesn’t have anything to lose anymore, from what we have heard from cognitive Akechi. He has no reason to turn against us because his original plan is already doomed to fail.’’ She turned her back to Gorō.

’’Makoto-senpai, I know you're right an’ all. But… I can’t just, forgive him, you ’now?’’ Sakamoto explained with frustration.

’’Don’t misunderstand Ryūji-kun. I’m not telling you to trust him or to forgive him. Just to keep both options open. He could be pretending, but right now there is more evidence of him trying to become better,’’ Niijima reassured with the spirit fitting for a class president.

’’A'ight…’’ the blond rebel yielded.

Niijima cleared out some space at the desk they used for strategy meetings.

’’Akechi-kun, care to join us with planning and what to expect from Shidō?’’ she offered.

\---

Spilling everything that he knew from Shidō and his subordinates was refreshing.

Cleansing,

even if they already knew most of it, because of what they had seen in Shidō’s palace.

He went into much detail describing how and what members of the Shidō’s subordinates had been replaced, and how his political game had already been twisted from the start. Niijima, always a good head on her shoulders, was quick to ask the right questions and Gorō was happy to provide.

But when he told about the evidence he had left for Sae-san Niijima became furious, her previously calm tone of voice gone.

’’You hid the evidence?’’ She frowned in dismay, words judging.

’’If I didn’t Shidō could and would have destroy them.’’

’’No, but- If you had died back there in the Metaverse, those evidence would have never been found. Don’t you understand?’’ Niijima seemed to be distressed, and Gorō had a hard time following why she was mad.

’’Akechi… If you had died at the- at the Palace, all you did would have been in vain,’’ Takamaki spoke for Niijima who ground her teeth together.

’’I know that,’’ he answered calmly.

It wasn’t his problem what happened after he died.

He had made it clear that he trusted the Phantom thieves to bring the truth to light. Everything he knew and more would become common knowledge when they would change Shidō’s heart.

All his work since two years ago was meaningless.

He already knew that.

Still he had held on until to the bitter end,

just because he was too stubborn.

’’No, you don’t!’’ Sakamoto shouted and banged his fist against the desk. ’’You’ve been, like, a double agent? Well, that’s the most similar term I know, but- But you would’ve died and no one would’ve know anythin’ ’bout what you did. Like. They would’ve thought you were just a bad guy and not that you did all that shit to bring end to Shidō and his acts.’’

Gorō chuckled.

’’You are forgetting that most of the evidence I have gathered are of myself.

I **killed** people.

I made them have **mental and psychotic shutdowns.**

And I did it all for my revenge.

And even if I had been just watching from the side lines, I would have still let those things happen. My revenge is- was purely self-serving, even if it would have finally lead to Shidō’s arrest.’’

’’Akechi-kun,’’ Takamaki looked at him with pity, just like in Shidō’s Palace.

’’This sucks…’’ Sakamoto rubbed his fist in anger, like he didn’t know where to direct it next.

Gorō really didn’t like the way they looked at him. He rather would have them lash out in anger than this.

He was tempted to just make a run for it, just so that they would stop moping. Maybe tackle him to the ground after his trick and beat the shit out of him.

Really, it would be better.

He didn’t need their pity.

It was misplaced and he felt awful.

Morgana hopped to his lap, and Gorō’s first thought was that the cat was surprisingly light weighted.

’’Should we all go to Shibuya? We could await there for Joker and other’s to arrive,’’ the cat suggested and they all agreed despite the fact Gorō would be there with them.

Or he could be just cuffed and left here.

\---

During the trip to Shibuya Niijima, Takamaki and Sakamoto were at ease in his presence, and Gorō in-turn was the one that felt uncomfortable.

This was different from when he had worked with them undercover and they had only pretended to accept him into the team. Back then he had also distanced himself from them on purpose because of inevitable betrayal, so it had worked both ways. No one was losing anything in Gorō’s mind.

But now Sakamoto would lead him out of the train with a nudge.

And when they exited the underway halls and Takamaki would ask if Gorō wanted to buy crepes while they wait.

He agreed and while waiting in line Niijima would ask about his work with Sae-san and he would answer.

Gorō didn’t even know what he was feeling, but he didn’t like it.

He felt… 

Angry?

Bitter?

No,

it was **g** **uilt.**

He wanted to scream to them so they would stop looking at him with sad eyes.

**He didn’t deserve it!**

That he had tried to **kill** them all!

Had orders to kill them all, _even right now_ , and here they were here enjoying sweet crepes them, which Sakamoto couldn’t eat without spilling it on his clothes. Takamaki would laugh and nearly spill hers to the ground, until she saved it last minute with a well aimed bite. Niijima would try to calm them and bring them more to the side, so they wouldn’t be a bother to the other people.

Gorō felt alone, but he knew he wasn’t.

It was the exact opposite.

Even if this scene was something similar he had seen in school, he was actually part of this one. Not an outsider looking inside some random group.

And even more unbelievable, they knew what he did.

What he was, and they were still here.

He,

he felt like throwing up.

He wanted to shout for them to shut up, look at him horrified and remember who they were with and continue without him, where he couldn’t see them.

Yet he couldn’t bring himself to do that.

Because somehow he felt happy.

That they saw him.

They acknowledged him.

And didn’t turn away.

’’Akechi? Are you okay? You’ll get left behind,’’ Morgana peeked out from Kurusu’s bag that he was carrying. The weight of it really wasn’t heavy at all.

’’Oh, sorry just spaced out. I’m quite alright Morgana,’’ Gorō answered with a smile that he didn’t know whether it was fake or not.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Me writing this chapter while chanting to myself ’’’Mental breakdown! Mental breakdown!’’  
> Also Akechi has come to a realization that he is in fact a dog.


	8. Crush

Even without their full party of nine, Mementos requests were a piece of cake. It just goes to show that they had gotten stronger.

’’I wonder how others fare in our absence,’’ Fox wondered.

’’I’m more worried about us! I can’t walk anymore,’’ Oracle complained and Joker held back a laugh.

’’I bet you can when you hear the noise of clattering chains approaching us.’’

’’No, don’t remind me…! I’m paranoid as it is about that! Now I have to scan again just in case-!’’

’’It’s alright Oracle. It appears usually when we have arrived at a new floor, and even with our slow-pace, it shouldn’t catch us,’’ Noir tried to reassure everyone.

’’Don’t tempt fate Noir! Those are death flags you’re raising!’’ Futaba panicked.

’’I actually believe that were we to run into the reaper, Noir would be the only one capable enough to survive,’’ Fox noted.

’’Agreed,’’ Joker said.

’’No more reaper talk-! Okay, guys. Last floor before we're out,’’ their navigator ordered marching ahead faster.

’’Shame we couldn’t get to all the requests.’’ Noir sighed disappointed.

’’Bloodthirsty as ever I see,’’ Joker joked and continued. ’’Not to worry. Tomorrow I thought about bringing the rest of the team that got left out. With Mona on the team, we can get to the lower levels for the requests.’’

’’So we'll be the next in turn to keep Akechi in check?’’ Fox cast his eyes downwards in worry.

’’Don’t worry Fox! That boy is a total wuss! He can never beat my ultimate down smash!’’ Oracle was imitating the finishing move that she had last used on Akechi’s player character.

’’I’m not sure I follow.’’

’’Just think of the picture I sent to the group chat and you’ll be fine,’’ Joker offered.

’’Ah, I had completely forgotten about it. You see that was the day when all fruit* were half off in the nearby convenience store and I just had to get my hands on them- or rather my stomach. But I did use some of them as inspiration for my next piece. Such interesting shapes are star fruit and dragon fruit.’’

’’Fox, sometimes I worry about you. A lot.’’ Joker made a mental note to bring him the next patch of leftover curry.

’’Not to worry! Even if the picture might be lost in our group chat already, then I will just have to ask Akechi to recreate the pose.’’ Fox looked proud of himself.

’’That wasn’t what I was referring to.’’

\---

They made their way upstairs to the outside of the station. Joker tapped the navi and they reappeared in Shibuya back in their casual attire.

Akira attempted to raise their morale up even with all of them tired.

’’Thanks for today. You all did great.’’ 

’’No problem. Tomorrow, we’ll meet at Leblanc again then?’’ Haru affirmed.

’’That’s the plan. I will let you know if there'll be any changes.’’

Just when they were about to scatter, familiar faces made their way to them.

’’Everyone? What are you doing here?’’ Akira was delighted so it took him a moment to realize that Akechi was with them.

_Of course he was with them, but if they were here then what exactly did it entail?_

’’I suggested it. I bet you would be exhausted without my awesome abilities, so we came to check up on you,’’ Morgana explained emerging from Akira’s back that Akechi was holding.

’’Now that you mentioned, it was rude of you to stay behind. My legs are killing me because of you Mona…’’ Futaba bent down in exaggeration.

’’Akechi also seems to be with you?’’ Yūsuke pointed out and the said person didn’t react.

He seemed really out of it.

Not like when he had taken that sleeping medicine exhausted, but instead he looked dazed? Like he wasn’t really living in the moment.

There was a significant lag before his answer.

’’Yes, Kitagawa-kun. I’m sorry, if my presence put you on a foul mood.’’

Something was definitely up with Akechi, or so Akira determined.

’’No, not at all. I was just taken by surprise. I was actually wondering if you would be willing to model for me tomorrow?’’ Yūsuke continued as usual without a social filter.

’’Model?’’ Akechi repeated.

’’Yes. If you could-’’

’’I’ll let you talk about it with Akechi tomorrow Yūsuke. Futaba's really tired and it would be best that me and Akechi were to go with her,’’ Akira felt bad interrupting, but he couldn't ignore his instinct that something was wrong.

’’Oh, understood. Then, I’ll talk to you tomorrow Akechi,’’ Yūsuke responded positively.

Akechi nodded but still clearly out of the flow around him.

\---

When they were biting farewells, Akira came more and more worried about Akechi. So much so, that he walked the other boy to the attic before taking Futaba home.

When Akira came back Akechi was still standing where he had left him with Mona’s bag still in his hands.

’’Akechi?’’ Akira questioned, but he didn't get an answer but the same dazed look in which Akechi didn't seem to be focusing on anything.

’’Yes, Kurusu-kun?’’

Not once had he answered him back this nicely after getting back from Shidō’s Palace.

Akira needed to snap him out of, whatever this was.

Talking didn’t seem to help, so Akira reached out slowly and pried the bag that held Mona out of his grasp.

Akechi blinked rapidly as he seemed to become more aware of his surroundings.

’’I was still holding that?’’

’’Yeah. Morgana, do you know what’s up?’’ Akira asked and Mona jumped out of the bag.

’’No… When we were here, he was still himself,’’ he said.

’’Okay…’’ Akira mumbled.

He had to go ham on this investigation it seems.

’’Talking shit about me?’’ Akechi said it so casually, that it brought a warm chuckle from Akira.

’’Sorry, and no. Just… Sit down. I’ll bring you water.’’

Whatever that was, Akechi seemed more like himself again.

Or maybe that had been part of the detective too?

Akira was weirdly reminded of the Akechi just before the betrayal. When he would sit at Leblanc on a rainy night and looked like he didn’t want to leave, or their final night at the jazz club. Where one was possibly inside their own vast mind, but from the outsider's perspective just staring into space and you could think that time had stopped around them.

’’So… Wanna talk about it?’’ Akira tried his luck.

’’…It has nothing to do with you,’’ came a logical and cold answer.

’’I live with you, if you remember, so it has. And I’m genuinely interested.’’

’’…You have good friends,’’ Akechi said.

Akira waited for him to elaborate, but he never did.

’’Thanks?’’ he settled on.

Akechi laughed.

It wasn’t twisted and filled with despair and rage like at Shidō’s Palace.

Nor was it the hollow laugh when he confessed that he had nothing.

This was actually genuine, with a hint of sadness mixed in.

At that time Akira’s heart skipped a beat or a two.

And his face was most definitely bright red.

\---

Okay, he will admit it. He might have had _a small_ crush on Akechi. But that was back when there was this whole fiasco, when Akira knew he was a traitor. So even when they became fast friends and went on dates, he still managed to keep the whole crush thing compacted to just a few flirty comments here and there.

And all the while this whole cat and mouse game took place, they both were actually getting closer to one another.

Akechi would tell him things that _’’no one, but him in particular needed to know,’’_ or casually talk about trauma. Akira also noticed that he too became dependent on him. They would talk philosophy, science and superheroes.

Really nerdy stuff. 

But these were the conversation's Akira thought of most fondly. Because they both could completely disagree on a topic at the beginning of the conversation and afterwards meet somewhere in the middle. Or even when they ended up disagreeing then they would come to respect the others opposing opinions, just like Akechi’s thoughts on Phantom thieves.

These conversations made Akira truly feel like himself. That he could express himself freely.

Unlike his parents, who would immediately try to cut out anything that could be considered ’’abnormal’’ out of him.

Now he really found himself yearning for those moments with Akechi, which wasn’t good.

He was here staying with him and they had all possible time to talk, but he had Shidō to worry about.

They all had to.

He probably had never been so grateful to have gotten a message, not counting the abundance of worried messages after his presumed death.

_’Haru and I were wondering if Akechi-kun would like to come to Mementos with us tomorrow?’_ Makoto wrote.

_’Yes, I brought it up with Makoto,’_ Haru joined.

_’Huh? Why all o’ a sudden?’_ Ryūji asked.

_’We have to go to Shidō’s Palace eventually and we have to choose to either bring Akechi with us or to leave him alone for the time being. I rather keep him where we can see him, and he has already shown to wield impressive abilities which could help us when we might face_ _Shidō,’_ Makoto explained.

_’I’m a little unsure._ _What about my art piece with a moth?’_ Yūsuke had his own priorities.

_’Leave navigation to me (_ _｡_ _+_ _･_ _`ω_ _･_ _´)’_ Futaba typed.

_’No one is listening to my input?’_

_’Don’t worry Yūsuke, I have the photo saved on my phone._ _I can share it whenever you need it,’_ Akira offered.

_’I’m most grateful.’_

_’Are we good to go together to the Mementos?’_ Haru asked.

_’If everyone's there I think we can handle it,’_ Ann typed _._

_’Yeah. If Akechi goes nuts or what’ver, I can take him.’_ Ryūji was overly confident.

_’Ryūji is thirsting hard.’_

_’’What the hell Futaba?’’_

_’I don’t see any reason to object. I’ll let you decide for us Akira,’_ Yūsuke passed a baton to him.

Oh no, he had to face Akechi and talk to his pretty face.

He braced himself and took a deep breath.

’’Akechi, would you join me tomorrow in our trip to Mementos?’’

Akira mentally slapped himself, because he had phased it like they were to go on a date or something.

’’With all of you? Trusting me so easy, aren’t you?’’ Akechi hummed and Akira was happy the other hadn’t catch his stumbling.

’’Ryūji said he could take you on.’’

’’Idiotic. I guess, I must prove what I’m made of.’’

_Akira should refrain from saying anything flirty._

_To not say anything flirty._

’’You don’t have to prove anything to me, honey.’’

_He failed._

’’I despise you with all of my being,’’ Akechi groaned.

_’It’s fine by the two of us,’_ Akira typed.

It’s like they were a unit now.

_Stop it Akira. Bad thoughts. Bad._

’’What about me? You didn’t ask me!’’ Morgana meowed next to him.

_’*All 3 of us,’_ Akira corrected.

’’You still haven’t asked me!’’

\---

Akira woke up in the Velvet room, or so he had thought but the place was different from usual. Red lights like the siren’s were flashing, but nowhere was Igor or the twins to be seen. He was still inside the shut jail and was surrounded by others in the familiar circling shape facing the middle of the room. There was one working desk and the chair that remained empty but was still faced towards him.

Akira tested the jail bars shaking them trying to tier down the doors chains but to no avail.

It was too silent and too still. He usually woke up in the Velvet room only when Igor had specifically summoned him, otherwise he would have to walk in there willingly.

Something was different and he couldn’t tell what it was that had changed the space.

’’What are you doing there Kurusu-kun?’’ Akechi out of all people asked.

Akira stumbled back and turned around.

No, he wasn’t in the same jail cell.

’’Akechi?’’ he called.

He really hoped he wasn’t hallucinating this, because if he was now even dreaming of Akechi, he was really screwed. No amount of help could save his love-struck mind from itself.

’’Right here.’’

Following his voice Akira noticed how Akechi stood outside his cell, free. No handcuffs or weight tied to his ankle and no prisoner's outfit, even if he was more qualified to wear it than Akira.

’’Are we at Mementos or somewhere else?’’ Akechi guessed studying the room hands crossed.

’’We're in the Velvet room,’’ he stated, not sure how to begin explaining, or if it even mattered. This could be fake Akechi, a fragment of his unconsciousness or not. Maybe even a prank that Justine and Caroline would pull on him.

The detective nodded to himself while circling the space around Igor’s desk. He picked up one of the papers on top of the desk and started going through them scanning them through.

This whole thing was surreal and the lack of urgency from Akechi made Akira feel like he was the one out of his element here.

’’Aren’t you… going to help me out?’’ The trickster very kindly pleaded.

’’What do you think I’m doing? There is no lock on that door, so I’m looking for information. A hidden mechanism or a code.’’ The detective didn’t even bother to look at him more focused in his investigation.

The Velvet room flashed blue and in that moment Akechi disappeared.

’’Justine, did you feel that?’’

’’Yes, I did Caroline.’’

In the chair was seated a bizarre old man and there were two children in prison guards outfits just outside Akira's jail cell. The twins and Igor were back, or more like they had always been there.

’’What happened? Why was Ake-’’ he began.

’’Silence convict!’’ Caroline shouted and swung her baton to the bars electrifying it.

Akira hissed and stepped back in frustration.

’’You have acquired a bond you shouldn't have been able to acquire. And a reversed tarot card no less,’’ Igor spoke with a hint of amusement in his voice.

’’Master,’’ Justine and Caroline turned towards the long nosed man.

’’I’m intrigued. You are exceeding my expectations,’’ he spoke with a deep voice that almost sounded menacing.

’’Master is praising you, you should feel proud,’’ Caroline spoke up and Akira scanned the room again.

He couldn’t see all the cells, but he bet that if Akechi was still here, he would have reacted to the changed situation by now.

Akira decided to ask.

’’Do you have other clients, Igor?’’ 

’’I have had many. Their time and place have been different from yours. I presume that isn’t the answer you are looking for,’’ Velvet room’s master answers.

’’No…’’ he admitted, but chose to not explain himself.

Igor chuckled.

’’Indeed. The game still continues.’’

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Fruits are expensive in Japan. You usually buy them for the sick or when visiting someone as they're a rare treat. They're not something you casually buy for yourself.
> 
> Oops, Akira has a crush, who would have thought? Not me who tagged this with a ship, no sir.


	9. Powerless

Gorō woke up feeling out of place, like he wasn’t supposed to be here. It might be because he actually rested well despite the fact he hadn't taken any sleeping medicine. He was about to get up when he noticed Morgana laying on top of his stomach.

It appeared that he was stuck.

As much as he had every right to shake the thing off or even just gently move it, Gorō couldn’t bring himself to do it. To touch a speaking cat that said it was a human, but was most clearly a cat, wasn’t something that he didn’t want to get involved with.

It certainly wasn’t because he thought that the creature looked so calm sleeping.

He tilted his head towards the window.

The sun has just risen.

Later when Kurusu woke up and noticed Gorō’s peril, he had the audacity to lift the cat up like it was nothing.

\---

Today was Akechi’s first trip to the Mementos after his betrayal. He was still yet to process completely that the Phantom thieves trusted him enough to take a risk with him.

When they ventured to the Metaverse, Gorō felt like cold water had been poured over him. The glass in front of his eyes tinted the world in red, but he felt none of his other headgear around his face.

’’Wow! Look at Crow! He looks like an actual Crow now,’’ Oracle was calling attention to him.

’’It looks like... Like a fusion between both of his outfits,’’ Noir pointed out.

’’Like a plague doctor bringing us death,’’ Joker joked and Crow glared at him.

’’Man. I wish I could change my outfit to whatever I wanted,’’ Skull complained.

’’What would you change it to?’’ Mona taunted.

’’Well, I dunno-! You’re putting me on the spot!’’

’’How do you control it, Crow? The outfit changes I mean,’’ Queen asked.

’’I don’t. They change with my Persona,’’ Crow answered.

’’You have another Persona now then?’’ Panther wondered.

He shook his head.

He shouldn’t have.

He could use only two.

He didn’t feel any new presence within him,and was relieved.

He couldn’t handle more as he was now. 

**He would get torn apart.**

’’Maybe the outfit represents the new him? Now that Crow isn’t hiding how evil he is,’’ Joker guessed.

’’Well, there is certainly no reason for me to hide it,’’ Crow agreed.

\---

Fighting with Loki felt awkward. He could make shadows weaker but not stronger and control them. For all the credit they had given him Gorō felt weaker than ever. When he tried to make a shadow go berserk, all the shadows' thoughts would burst into his head instead. His headgear hadn’t been a totally cosmetic thing then or he simply had blocked it, like when he had closed his heart. He didn’t pay attention to others' suffering when he caused them to become psychotic or killed them.

It didn't help that Gorō’s new outfit felt foreign to him. A new cape flung half over his shoulders, so he had learned to ignore the feeling. It didn’t get in his way when he swung his saber, the weight of it just felt a little off. Heavier, but only slightly. Same feeling persevered with his new gloves and shoes. He gained some new respect for Noir who also fought with a hat o, now that he had to turn his head more to gain a wider view.

Gods he felt like a dead weight.

Fox slapped him on the back and he bent forward in pain.

’’Leave this to us.’’

_He couldn’t be useless, could he?_

_He just needed to get used to this correct?_

Even when Fox had told him otherwise he gathered his strength to switch to Robin hood in the middle of the battle.

He found the Persona from the depths of his soul and called it forward, waiting for his outfit to change.

It didn’t.

His Persona appeared and for a fleeting moment Crow thought he had acquired something new. Something that would let him stand by Joker’s side on equal ground, but hen he froze and he couldn’t move. There was this loud one noted tone in his head, like a broken machine trying to start. Low and excruciating.

He could see that a shadow was heading towards him, but he was paralyzed. Body trying to catch up with the switch of a Persona.

Skull knocked him out of the way and blocked the shadow with a bat.

’’The hell? Don’t just stand there!’’

After the battle Joker made an announcement.

’’Crow, until we're done with the requests you’ll be on time-out. You can fight after.’’

He didn’t argue back.

\---

The Mementos was creepy as ever. It’s long never ending hallways or rooms that lured them to dead ends. Others complained that the wind sounded vaguely like low screams. They had just crossed out their final request when they suddenly sunk through the rails through the once solid ground. Everyone braced for the impact.

The car, or in this case also Mona, bounced around until a shadow knocked it over. Everyone scattered around ready to fight and Gorō hung back sniping the leftovers.

After the shadows were defeated, Joker came to collect him.

’’Look at you. You can fight well without a Persona.’’

’’Without a Persona, I’m as good as useless,’’ he rejected the compliment.

’’Noir was the same at first, maybe you’ll get a hang on it at Shidō’s Palace,’’ Joker said casually, but Crow hesitated.

’’…You intend to bring me with you?’’

’’You say it like it’s a bad thing,’’ the other picked out his tone.

Gorō, in turn, _really_ didn’t want to talk about this, but Joker signed others to go ahead into the car.

_Dammit._

’’Don’t you want to carry out your revenge? …Or is it something you no longer feel strongly towards?’’ Joker kept prying.

’’Of course I want to. Just…’’ Crow let his words die down.

The guilt stung.

He hadn’t even apologized to Okumura or to Sakura, yet he was welcomed to join their crew and he could even make his longest desire come true.

Bring Shidō down.

They had been nothing but good to him and he had done absolutely nothing to deserve it.

He felt like he was still using them for his own selfish goal. Just using them as a stepping stone for his revenge. That nothing had ultimately changed since their confrontation.

’’…How do you use multiple Personas? Isn't it exhausting or confusing?’’ Crow asked instead.

He left the painful part out. It was hard enough to admit his weak point to Joker. He didn’t want pity mixed in that. If he- _they_ were to bring Shidō down, he at least didn’t want to stay as a burden.

His leader took this change of topic well.

’’It did at first, but then once I found out how to ground them in reality, it got easier. I don’t know how you acquired two, but I started with one. Afterwards, I started gaining new ones tied to my close confidants.’’

’’Confidants?’’ Crow repeated.

’’Friends, companions or people I wanted to connect to. -And yes that includes you.’’ Joker let it sink in and Gorō didn’t know how to react to that.

’’I used to separate Personas by what they represented. Thinking about how it related to my companions. I came to think that my Personas didn’t belong to me, but to them. That was a mistake I soon came to realize.

I think the key is to think Personas as reflections of how you act with others around you, like masks we wear around them.’’

’’So like pretending?’’ Crow interpreted.

He could already pass as an actor, pretending to be something he’s not on the daily basis.

_Lie to everyone including himself._

’’I wouldn’t say so. Personas are just different parts of you. How you might act different towards a kid compared to a elderly person for example. You’re bringing out new sides of you, but at the core you remain the same. Whatever front you might put up, you are still you.

Like… when you were deceiving us, but I could still at certain moments see the real you underneath,’’ Joker averted his eyes in the final sentence, like he was embarrassed.

’’You’re giving yourself an ego boost,’’ Crow crossed his arms.

He hated how he would give Kurusu openings in his long hardened shell. Yet he continued to give them to him, like consuming poison he believed he could become immune to if he would force himself to swallow the required intake. 

Irrational.

His own weakness had led him to search for connection from the worst place. From Joker. The one he knew he had to betray.

’’Sorry. Just- Did you have the two Personas from the beginning?’’ Kurusu verified.

’’Yes.’’

To that, Joker seemed lost at words. He probably came to realize that he had just spouted a bunch of nonsense to Akechi’s ears.

’’Then in that sense, you’re more special than me. Managing two from the start. Not sure if I could have handled that.’’

Gorō didn’t like that he felt good at hearing that. Valued.

’’When I first saw you, I thought you represent justice,’’ Joker confessed.

Crow cracked a smile at that.

’’Justice? Really?’’

’’Yes, and still do. Just a different kind of justice.’’ Kurusu seemed confident about said statement.

Yes, Gorō acted with justice that was purely self serving, with no idealistic nonsense mixed in it.

Still, he had tried the oldest way to redeem himself.

A self sacrificing hero; idea he used to look up to as a kid. Maybe there was some of that innocence still left in him even after everything.

’’Let’s talk more at Leblanc. We shouldn’t keep others waiting.’’ Joker gave him a short lived smile and patted him on the shoulder, like Gorō had done while they were exploring Sae-san’s Palace.

’’You remind me of a fool or a clown,’’ he spoke up.

Kurusu stopped mid step looking smug.

’’Just so you know, in tarot readings a fool is number zero. It’s seen as the beginning to everything and unlimited possibilities. So, I will take that as compliment.’’

In his mind Gorō saw flashbacks of blue butterflies and vague dreams.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I drew Akechi's new outfit and you can find it on the following links:  
> [Twitter](https://twitter.com/RuosteRauta/status/1307671560929579009)  
> [Tumbler](https://ruosterauta.tumblr.com/post/629783040250560514/justice-reversed-chapter-1-ruoste-persona-5)
> 
> So I had to look up the word ’’verify’’, because I only knew the word in Japanese (kakunin 確認). I put the kanjis in the translator and lo behold I got it. Haha. It’s weird when you think in 3 different languages.
> 
> (Love how the most romantic thing Akechi has done so far is that he compared Akira to poison.)


	10. Why?

’’I win!’’ Sakura shouted what must be the 15 times in a row. Honestly it was getting increasingly irritating.

’’Shouldn’t you be getting back home soon? We went to Mementos today and I'm exhausted,’’ Kurusu noted. Despite his words, he had been crafting multiple things that could be useful in the Palace for an hour now.

’’Not yet! I have to beat Akechi at least 99 times before we can go to the Palace,’’ she stated earnestly.

’’Does that number have any meaning?’’ Kurusu asked casually.

’’It’s a max level at nearly all good RPGs! We gotta grind to be prepared.’’

’’I really don’t see how this is going to have any effect on my performance,’’ Gorō pointed out.

’’I’m gonna max out your bar and other stats so I’ll get the best ending,’’ Sakura announced.

_That sounded menacing._

Kurusu stretched his arms behind his back.

’’Alright I’ll leave you two at it, I’m going to bed,’’

’’I'll keep an eye on them,’’ Morgana offered.

’’Thank you Mona. You’re the best nanny I could ask,’’ Kurusu gave the said cat a pat, who moved between the two gamers as a spectator.

\---

This all was completely unnecessary. A waste of time.

No way could Gorō even after 99 times of matches compare to Sakura. If it was mind games, chess or shōgi, he was confident. Even games that require precision like billiard or darts would be better. Yet here he was, button smashing against some super hacker genius and the founder of Medjed. But because if he could beat Sakura who held those titles, maybe, just maybe he could prove something.

To himself?

To others?

He didn’t know.

’’26 continuous wins for me,’’ Sakura waved her hands around in some kind of improvised dance.

’’You aren’t counting one’s from last week together?’’ Gorō wondered.

’’You remember the number of times you lost?’’

’’Yes. Five-’’

’’You really hold grudges. You should let go of that, Akechi,’’ Sakura pouted.

’’We wouldn’t be here now if I had,’’ he noted darkly.

’’True,’’ she agreed.

Compared to the manic sequence of buttons, this round was more circling around and trying to figure the other out.

’’…Aren’t you mad at me?’’ Gorō asked.

Even if Sakura gained some kind of sadistic joy from beating him at a video game, it couldn’t have been enough to outweigh her anger she must feel.

’’You know what Akechi, I was- I still am mad what you did to my mother but…’’ The hacker took a shaky breath.

’’I guess the rage for all the adults that put you up to the job makes me more angry. It outweighs what I feel towards your actions, it just kinda works like that,’’ she shrugged and went on gaming like it was nothing but a breeze.

’’I don’t understand,’’ Gorō refused her reasoning. The cat kept circling in his feet, but it wasn’t bothering him enough for him to ignore such an illogical conclusion that she had come to.

’’There is this cruel assassin in typical RPGs. They usually join your team after they either save their prior target or just can’t bring themselves to kill anymore. A little like you.’’

It sounded childish, but he kept on listening to her logic.

’’They're usually really OP. Great move set and skills. I think it would be kinda cool if you could have someone like that in your party in real life,’’ Sakura sang words in her own world that he just couldn’t comprehend.

’’…You don’t want to know what happened to your mother?’’

That made Sakura pause the game.

She was resting her head in her knees and half hugging herself. Making herself as small as she could.

’’I… I already saw it happen. I don’t want to hear it,’’ Sakura whimpered and the ex-detective overcame a sense of regret.

Why was he even pushing the issue?

He didn’t want to talk about it and neither Sakura heard about it. It was because of his own yearning for closer. How he would clean a flesh wound with pouring of alcohol in it. It burned, a reminder of a pain he had already experienced. 

But Gorō couldn’t remember.

He couldn’t remember clearly how he had felt when Sakura’s mother had screamed,

or when she begged that if nothing else let her daughter be safe,

talking how she was the most precious thing she had.

An opposite to his mother who couldn’t take the pressure and had ended her own life. He might have felt jealous, but he had seen the struggle of her own mother in person. He couldn’t compare them.

So in the end he had let her off easy, right?

Saved from Shidō’s other assassins or stripped away from her title and job. Losing slowly all credibility and left to rot on the streets.

He had convinced himself that in a way he had spared her.

**But he hadn’t.**

Sakura had experienced the exact sense of loss that he had gone through. A child who saw their only parent die in front of their eyes.

After a long silence she turned her head towards Gorō.

’’I-I’m moving forward. I don’t want to hear it, because I’m moving forward! I’ll continue my mother's research and make her proud of me,’’ Sakura said wiping her nose and she smiled, all the while meeting eyes with the one who murdered her own mother.

Gorō himself couldn’t return such an intense gaze, turning his own eyes elsewhere.

’’…You are strong Sakura-san.’’

Much stronger than him.

Not getting hung up on her sorrow and anger, but looking for a way past it, and looking forward instead.

_Could he find the same courage? To find a new goal, after Shidō’s fall?_

’’Wha-What!? Me? An assassin tries to recruit me to a dark side?!’’ Sakura flustered.

’’I’m not,’’ Gorō assured.

’’I get it. Getting desperate aren’t you. But I won’t let you win!’’ Sakura unpaused the game and pulled a fierce combo finishing with a down smash. Gorō lost his last stock.

’’Tada-da-daa! 27 wins for Futaba Sakura. 72 wins to go,’’ she joyfully called.

\---

They never did get to 99 wins. Sakura collapsed at 57th, or 62nd if Gorō counted together the losses from the last time they had played.

She snored on the couch sound asleep which so far had been his bed.

Instead of waking her up, he had killed time downstairs cleaning. He began with the shelf behind the counter that were filled with different coffee beans. They weren’t in any alphabetical order, so Gorō couldn’t bring himself to start to dust them without thought. He instead took a few out, placed them on the counter until he had cleaned that proportion.

So he continued even when Morgana whined to just wake Sakura up.

He ignored it.

After he was finished with the shelf and started to work on the tables, the cat had seemingly given up and let him work in peace.

He didn’t want to know Sakura's reaction if he were to wake her up.

He saw through that brave face she had. Catching her off guard would have left her frozen with terror, or maybe she would just blindly start thrashing around convinced that Gorō had tried to kill her.

He was a coward. 

He just didn’t want to face her. Actually he was over-boiling with unreleased stress and paranoia. He had anticipated through the whole confrontation with Sakura when she would start to cry or scream upset.

Scream to give her mother back.

Beat him with her scrawny fists, hurting herself more than she could damage Gorō. Then once she was satisfied, she would say that she didn’t want to see him ever again.

He would nob, pack his things and go back to his old apartment.

Then someone who had been hired by Shidō would come to knock on his door. When he would let the intruder in he would die. Shot in the forehead, just like he had done to so many others.

All things that he deserved.

Yet he didn’t want to throw his life away in vain.

That’s why he couldn’t even be in the same space as her which had led him here. Just so he could use any excuse to buy time he had in this place. To distract himself from the inevitable.

He was selfish, wasn’t he?

How **dare** he use these kind people to his advantage. To crouch in their warm home when he has only delivered **agony** in a nice package, left it at their doorstep from an unknown sender, only for Isshiki Wakaba to open it.

And as much as he now would regret it, he couldn’t make it better.

He couldn’t turn back time, because he knew it more closer than anything;

**The dead won’t come back.**

The store’s bell rang as the front door opened.

Gorō, out of habit felt his waist for a hidden gun, but he held none.

’’Oh, hello Akechi-kun. Is Futaba here?’’ Sōjirō Sakura greeted and tension drained from his shoulders.

’’Yes, she is. She’s asleep upstairs,’’ he explained, and became suddenly came very self-conscious how suspicious he must have looked to the Leblanc’s boss.

Here alone, while Sakura and Kurusu were supposedly sleeping.

He could have killed them for all the older man knew.

Boss hummed as a response and his eyes wandered around the store.

’’…Were you cleaning?’’

’’Yes. There was nothing else I could think of that could be of any use to you, I’m afraid. Thank you for letting me stay in here,’’ Akechi bowed deeply, yet it was a little late for thanks, but he hoped the barista would understand.

’’You speak as if you’re going to leave,’’ the older man noted, and Gorō bit down on his lower lip.

Boss sighed deeply and walked behind the counter.

’’I’ll pour you a cup of coffee. Despite what you might think of caffeine, it actually helps you sleep if you go to bed before its effects begin to kicks in.’’

Gorō just stared, head still hung in a half bow.

’’Come on, don’t just stand there. Come and sit down,’’ Boss laughed and tapped the counter.

\---

Even though Sōjirō Sakura had said it was coffee, Gorō was 99 percent sure the cup he was given contained hot chocolate. He could smell the hints of coffee beans in it, but he was quite sure the smell had attached itself to everything in this shop.

Gorō still drank it like he would drink his coffee; small sips, pretending he could taste something else than the overly sweet chocolate he was consuming.

’’Did you have fun with Futaba? She was quite persistent that you finish the game you played,’’ Boss questioned.

’’I’m afraid we didn’t finish it,’’ he answered.

’’Fell asleep on you did she? Bet you couldn’t wake her up. She falls asleep like a lamp with a flick of a light-switch and sleeps like a log.’’ The older man chuckled.

’’I… have heard, you were close with Isshi- Sakura-san’s mother,’’ Gorō spoke up. He couldn’t even say the name of Sakura’s mother without choking up. Throat closing in an attempt to stop him from stomach acid rising to his mouth.

_Why was he doing this? He just has to ruin everything._

_He bet that Sōjirō Sakura hated him with all his gut but was better than that, and here was Gorō making his attempt a disgrace._

’’Yes, I was. Did you talk about Wakaba with Futaba?’’ Boss answered like he wasn’t the least fazed.

’’She just said that she- She would like to continue her mother’s research. She didn’t want to talk about it,’’ he quoted. Suddenly saying even Sakura’s name was hard.

’’She's a strong girl, isn’t she? And you must be wondering how could she forgive you so easily?’’ he guessed and Gorō went speechless.

’’Read your thoughts? You have to notice things like that if you work in customer service.’’ Boss took pride in his job.

’’…Why?’’ Akechi spoke to himself more than anything else. 

’’I can’t speak for Futaba, but I would say she would rather make friends with you than stay angry. You kids have a lot in common from what I heard. Same goes for Akira, but I think- well, I shouldn’t pry,’’ Boss scratched the back of his neck in contemplation.

’’But I don’t deserve it. Doesn’t she already have Kurusu-kun and the others? I… I don’t understand,’’ Gorō struggled.

What of it if they were similar?

She already had friends who helped her, in a complete opposite way to him.

And his father was okay with this?

_None of this made even the slightest bit of sense._

’’Nor you need to. Listen kid, when I was your age, I spent too much time worrying how to be popular with girls and nothing else.

What you did when you were 17 will be long in the past when you get to adulthood. Even with all the mistakes you have made, you have more than enough time to make up for them,’’ Boss spoke wise words that could only come with age, and Gorō wasn’t sure why the ’’coffee’’ he drank tasted awfully salty all of a sudden.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You thought this would be from Akira's POV, but it was him, Akechi!  
> Reason for this being, that now that I'm over the halfway point I changed the order of POV's, so that we begin and end with Akira's POV. Next chapter will be from Akira's POV as usual.
> 
> Sōjirō adopts all the children that are mistreated by their parents. You can’t change my mind.


	11. The ark

Today was the day they would have to send the calling card.

Shidō had left a messaged for Akechi this morning which told him to hurry and eliminate the Phantom thieves or there would be consequences. Despite just yesterday going to Mementos, they all decided it would be safest to make a move now before Shidō would do deeper digging his supposed paw's movements and their hand would be forced. They send the calling card the same day as they infiltrated the Palace, because the president in the running would catch on to their trick as soon as he saw the calling card. Akechi’s previous messages would be brought into question and other hitmen would be sent after them.

It was by far the most risky job they have attempted. If they couldn’t trigger the change of heart, all of them would be in danger.

_This will put an end to it all._

The key to their multiple mission's success so far was Akira’s determination. He never wavered on his ideas. Pushing past more complicated and dangerous jobs gave him an adrenaline rush.

You might think he was a fool like Akechi had said, but actually it was mostly a front.

He felt fear like anyone else, but as a leader he had to learn not to show it. Instead he would act in an overly dramatic fashion to calm his nerves. Fake it until he made it. Pull off complicated stunts, stand tall and not hunched. Speak his mind without overly relying on other people. Be able to stand up for himself.

The ideal version of himself.

The more he acted this way, as a trickster that stole hearts, the more it blended with his own personality.

Maybe this was what he was originally, but his parents and society pressed him into a mold fitting for a Japanese high school student. Introverted, quiet and reserved, modest, hardworking- Not all bad traits, but different from him.

He was extroverted, and would poke his nose into other people’s business for the fun of it. He would talk to a certain young street performer in Shibuya every time he passed them, and would listen to anyone who called out to him.

He wasn’t exactly loud, but was more than happy to lead the conversation and Akira loved to be in the spotlight- In a positive one if he could help it.

He could work hard when needed to, but was very easily distracted and would only put his full effort into the things he enjoyed.

And now bluffing that he wasn’t worried about the inevitable confrontation with Shidō’s shadow came almost naturally at this point, as Joker led the Phantom thieves to the treasure.

\---

The conference room was empty. The giant Daruma doll curtains loomed over the empty audience seats and there on the podium stood Shidō, or more precise his shadow.

’’I have been expecting you,’’ he spoke and Joker had a hard time keeping up a straight face and not giving into his anger. The man behaved as he owned the world looking down on them, not even bothering to come down to greet them. Completely at ease, not even slightly worried about what their presence meant.

’’I see you brought Akechi here. So you finally decided to betray me? How amusing. You found new people to launch on to, like leech you are.’’ Shidō brushed off the detective’s betrayal.

’’Eff you man! You're the one who leeched of’ his abilities. Made him kill fo’ you!’’ Skull shouted.

’’But I was the one who gave him purpose. He should feel honored. God gave him the opportunity by bringing him to me, so I could rule,’’ Shidō justified and spread his arms.

’’That’s just your own delusion.’’ Fox grimaced.

’’So, you were expecting my betrayal?’’ Crow spoke, vacant of any emotion.

’’Yes. You remind me too much of that woman,’’ he didn’t even speak Akechi’s mother’s name. Like it tasted foul on his lips.

Dirty.

’’She was unbearably clingy. Always asking when we could meet, even when she knew my status. What a bothersome woman. Like mother, like son. That whore should have known her place,’’ Shidō snarled and Akechi growled.

’’Shut up.’’

’’Yes, I have no use for a compromised pawn like you. Then how about you Phantom thieves? Will you help me bring this country to a new age of glory?’’

’’You have to be joking,’’ Queen stammered.

Just how cocky this corrupted politician was starting to sink in. They had seen his world view through the Palace. Seen just how he thought that all before him were nothing but mice, or just as insignificant.

And now the man himself wanted them on his side, because he was so confident his own abilities outweighed theirs.

In a way just that was intimidating.

’’Losing Akechi is a shame, but I was going to have to dispose of him regardless after my election. You, on the other hand, can move freely after the culprit of the mental and psychotic breakdowns has been found guilty,’’ Shidō explained his plan.

He was going to sell Akechi off after everything he had done? Make him bare the sins he made him do?

Akira had to resist the urge to spit on the candidate.

’’No way,’’ Panther huffed.

’’It's your choice. But I’ll give you this last chance to fight for me or against me. I’ll be the one to bring Japan to it’s new height,’’ he continued unbothered.

’’Never in a million years,’’ Joker spoke and hoped he was clear enough so the scum would shut his mouth already.

’’Then you have made your choice.’’ Shidō turned to the crowd now filled with people, who began to clap for him furiously. They were all his own mental audience.

\---

Fighting against Shidō felt overbearing. The man himself didn’t fight but would use his cognition of people, or what he called just ’’masses’’, around him as weapons. Human shapes shifted from the lion, to a flying eagle, to a literal human shield.

A reminiscence of Madarame’s sculpture made from his previous pupils and Joker noticed how Yūsuke’s face was twisting in disgust.

Despite not fighting, Shidō wore an ancient military uniform like he was going to war. His thought process and ideology was clearly dangerous. Who knew what kind of tyranny Shidō would create and on what scale once he rose to a prime minister.

They needed to stop him.

Akechi seemed calm. Too calm, Akira noted. He could control his Personas and switch between them without consequences, but then he froze. Multiple women shaped statues were covering Shidō. Joker didn’t need to be a genius to guess who Akechi must have recognized.

’’You’re too weak-willed. If you aren’t ready to sacrifice everything so that you can tread over them, then you can’t stand next to me in battle,’’ Shidō taunted.

’’How could you? Does Akechi being your son mean nothing?’’ Panther shouted.

’’Those with unnecessary feelings of attachment are weak. Ready to be exploited. He is nothing more than a hindrance to my image. Easy to manipulate just with praise. Same with women.’’ He dug his own grave in Joker’s mind, by saying that.

’’Sexist scum,’’ Queen spit out and called out her persona Anat.

_Shidō really shouldn't have referred to the future police coordinator in the making by that manner._

’’We will show you what we are made of!’’ Panther joined and summoned Hecate.

’’I’ll make you pay for what you did to my father!’’ Noir cast a Mapsiodyne and the wall made from women cracked and collapsed under the weight of the girls attacks.

’’Joker! Now it's your chance!’’ Oracle called.

Joker took this moment to aim and shot.

Shidō’s helmet flew off.

’’It seems you shouldn’t underestimate thieves when they come in great numbers,’’ Shidō muttered and instead of calling for more people for his side, he let the pillar of people fade. ’’Useless masses.’’

’’Putting the blame on the masses when you lose?’’ Skull challenged.

Shidō ignored the comment, instead looking at Joker still holding out his gun.

’’So… you’re the one unifying them?’’

’’Should have crushed him when you had a change. Well too late for now,’’ Oracle taunted.

’’Remember me?’’ Akira took off his mask.

’’Hm? You… You’re that damn brat!’’ he recognized with distaste.

’’Yes, the one you took the court,’’ Mona confirmed.

’’You stood up to me when I was with that woman…’’ Shidō recollected.

’’For all the talk about standing alone, you sure love the company of women,’’ Akechi analysed and Joker glanced his way to see if the detective was okay. For now he seemed to keep it together. He might have held his weapon a little too tight, but otherwise he seemed to be able to continue fighting.

’’If you would count every ant you crush when you’re walking to your destination, you could never reach it,’’ Shidō justified and Noir’s face was caught in surprise.

’’Ants?’’ she repeated.

’’Crushing? You mean killing?’’ Queen made a guess.

’’I don’t expect ignorant masses to understand. I will crush you,’’ he removed his armor like it was just for show.

Shidō thought he needed to only use his own power to defeat them. For just how insane his cognitive version must be to think himself as all powerful?

\---

It should have been ridiculous how ripped Shidō saw himself, but in this situation Joker couldn’t find it funny.

Literal punches the man threw sent forward blasts of air strong enough to send them flying. When he landed a hit on a solid floor, it cracked. They had to stay as far as they could while casting spells.

When they thought they had defeated him, Shidō would rise again stronger.

Joker began to think they wouldn’t be able to defeat someone who thought they were invincible. He forced the thought away, because he shouldn’t question himself.

The very same power that Shidō used, they all had, but it was tamed and accurate.

Joker cast a Bufudine, and Shidō fell, only to get up again.

Frustrated, Shidō swung his arm so the gust sent them all flying. Then he slammed the ground, and they were left trapped within the walls of concrete that were separating them.

’’I-I think he’s on his last stand. You can finish him Joker!’’ Oracle encouraged inside her navigator Persona, Necronomicon.

As much as Akira could deceive himself, he knew that he couldn’t do this alone.

Shidō was screaming in a mad furry and Joker felt dizzy.

He got most of his strength from others. Just them being by his side let him believe in the impossible, but now without them he felt powerless.

He tried to attack, but that left him vulnerable and he was taking hits. He was running out of energy with all the healing spells he kept casting. Akira was out of steam, or more so out of willpower. The facade of his confidence crumbling as every doubt would re-emerge in his head.

_What would happen if he was to fall?_

_Would everyone continue fighting, or would they retreat?_

_Why was he even the leader?_

_Because he had awakened his Persona first?_

_But there others could do this job better than him. Makoto was class president for a reason, Morgana who knew the Metaverse the best..._

It all kept surfacing in his head and the panic started to set in.

Shidō threw himself towards Akira, but was thrown away by an arrow to the shoulder.

Crow was there, standing next to him.

’’You're trying to play hero all by yourself?’’ he taunted, using the same tone of voice whenever he was challenging Akira into a contest.

’’I rather not actually. The help is appreciated,’’ he admitted, too shaken to hide the relief the other boy had brought him.

Crow cast Kouga and Joker Maeiga, making Shido fall on his knees. For a second they thought he was going to get up, but he fell plain on his face.

Akechi pulled out his gun and now held Shidō at a gunpoint.

’’I have lost? What a weird feeling,’’ the man spoke.

\---

Everyone had managed to gathered to the fight scene, after finding their way over the rubble.

’’Got something nice to say for a change?’’ Joker tempted.

’’I… admit that I accused you wrongly only to save myself. I’m sorry,’’ the man hung his head low and ashamed.

’’And Akechi?’’ He was disgusted that Shidō had deemed him more worthy of an apology than his own son.

’’I… I left his mother to suffer alone. Never gave her money because it could be traced back to me. She had to live alone in poverty with a child and I knew she didn't have any friends or supporting family to lean on. She was an easy target to take advantage of, so I did. I can never apologize enough,’’ Shidō came clear and had Joker had the strength, he would have punched the bastard.

’’You should continue to regret it for the rest of your miserable life,’’ Crow spoke with difficulty. Like he had practiced the words for this moment but still couldn’t prepare enough.

’’Yes I should. It’s been awhile since I’ve apologized sincerely.’’ Shidō closed his eyes like waiting for the finishing blow.

Akechi still held a gun aimed at Shidō, his hand now visible shaking.

The detective’s glassy eyes were there again. A blank stare, just like when he had initially tried to kill them before he had transformed into a manifestation of madness and rage. Akechi kept all those feelings bottled up so he could use them when he would have to act. Do the necessary job. To be able to kill.

Yet now it was all cracking.

The emotionless mask, the perfect position to shoot, but he still hadn’t.

He had no clear intent to fire. He seemed the opposite.

Akechi was- no, he **had** already changed, so Akira believed.

Joker was pretty sure Crow was petrified to the position. In a point of only half understanding what was going on and not aware of his own actions. Just like before, when he had carried Morgana's bag in his grasp.

Gently Joker laid his hand on top of Crow’s. The other reacted only with a small inhale in his already unsteady breathing.

’’Easy,’’ Akira spoke softly and brought Akechi’s hand down with his.

’’…I’m sorry.’’

’’Don’t be. After all the shit he spoke about you and your mother, I myself had a hard time not to shoot him in the face,’’ Joker smiled and Crow let out a nervous laugh.

**_Justice has taken a new form, realizing a world that isn’t of black nor white._ **

_**Passing judgement is not always required by oneself, no one shape of justice is absolute.** _

**_It strives to reach new heights on its morality._ **

_**Path to its self realization has only begun.** _

**_Now hear their vows that will be thy wings to break the already decided future._**

The wheel of the ship descended for them. It was the Palace’s treasure and before Morgana could even touch it, the shadow Shidō fell to the ground in pain and vanished.

Then all hell broke loose.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 100% sure Shidō is misogynistic fuck (Sorry Ryūji, I can say it. You can only say eff), so it’s fitting how all the girls get to kick his ass first.
> 
> Also you tell me there isn’t anything more romantic than holding your crush’s hand when lowering a loaded gun together? UwU


	12. Scars

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Strong trigger warning for this chapter of referenced child and domestic abuse.

The Palace was collapsing and everyone was panicking. Sakura tried to find a way out of a sinking ship, and Gorō was swearing about how he should have known Shidō had developed some kind of countermeasure against the change of heart. Kurusu was leading him on, but the halls were beginning to tilt at dangerously vast angles and some were already submerged beneath the water.

They managed to get out just barely with the help of Sakamoto who ran for the lever and released the lifeboats. For a while they thought he had died, as they couldn’t find him in the real world after Palace’s collapse. In the end the jock too got out of the Palace safe.

All of them were beyond relieved.

Gorō himself didn't know how to feel.

_Has the change of heart worked?_

_If not, then he should have shot Shidō while he had a chance._

_What now?_

_Shidō and his subordinates still existed and they haven’t verified the existence of their Palaces._

’’Oh, sorry-’’ Kurusu began to say, but stopped mid sentence.

’’…What?’’ Gorō asked and the other boy shook his head.

’’Let’s go home for today. This has been a long day.’’

Gorō wanted to voice his concerns, but everyone was already scattering off. They couldn’t spend too long in front of the Diet building without raising suspicion.

’’I don’t think it was wise to separate. They might be waiting for an opportunity to strike, especially if we didn’t succeed at the change of heart,’’ he said.

’’Mona has the wheel even now. I say it all worked out,’’ Kurusu reassured and a familiar head poked from inside his bag.

’’Yes! I have! It’s a small ship inside a glass bottle,’’ the cat meowed.

’’It doesn’t mean-’’ Gorō argued.

’’Alright worrywart, let’s go back to Leblanc. If it isn't okay, then we're screwed either way.’’ 

’’I thought you were more of an idealistic or positive thinker,’’ he was thrown off by the change of mentality in the Phantom leader.

’’You’re cynicism is contagious,’’ Kurusu offered and tugged his arm. ’’Let’s go.’’

_Since when he had been holding on to it?_

For now the detective didn’t mind. He needed something to ground him to this reality. 

\---

When Gorō saw the state of the Leblanc he wanted to say he was right, but more than that he needed to get Kurusu and Sakura out of here.

The cafe had been trashed.

Plates, cups and coffee pots had been removed from their original places in a hurry. Few of them had fallen over the counter and broken. Paperwork had been fished out and scattered like someone had scanned their content for clues. Even some boxes from the attic and newspapers that had been thrown away the day before had been brought back to the shop. Clearly someone had searched all the existing belongings for clues of their whereabouts.

’’Sōjirō? This isn’t funny…’’ Sakura was stepping further to the store to investigate, but Gorō blocked her access so she couldn’t go any further.

’’We have to go. They could be upstairs,’’ he spoke hastily.

’’Where to? Where can we go? What about the others?’’ Kurusu questioned, more worried about his other teammates.

’’Anywhere! Internet cafe, motel- We don’t have time. We can’t stay here, they’ll-’’ Gorō pressured, until the shop’s door rang as it was opened.

’’Oh, you guys are back,’’ the voice of Sōjirō Sakura interrupted.

’’Sōjirō! You are the same as Ryūji!’’ Sakura whined and threw herself against the Boss with a running hug.

’’Wow there-! As usual I have no idea what you're talking about…’’ The older man contemplated, but returned the hug patting her daughter’s head.

’’What happened here? Did Shidō do this?’’ Gorō had to ask.

’’Yes, I think they were his men. Took me someplace blindfolded, then they released me when something happened. I think something to do with the Phantom thieves?’’ the older man made a guess.

’’Yes, a change of heart, or something like that,’’ Kurusu spoke cunningly.

’’Thought so. Well, I could use some help with cleaning this place up,’’ Boss continued like it was no big deal.

’’And if they come again? How are the others?’’ Gorō couldn’t hide his concern.

’’Then we’ll deal with it. But by the sound of it, they have their hands full with Shidō’s change of heart. I’ll text everyone just in case,’’ Kurusu continued not at all alarmed as he should be.

’’But, what if they can undo it?’’

’’Then wouldn’t you know about it? Shidō had to use you to chase us. He saw us as a threat. I think it’s unlikely.’’

’’But-’’

’’You can have your lover’s spat later boys. If those guys mess this place up one more time, I’ll have Niijima-san deal with them. Now let’s clean this place up,’’ boss ordered and Gorō swallowed his arguments for another time.

\---

With the state of Leblanc as it was, they predicted his own apartment fared in a similar state. Kurusu offered to help him check the state of it, but Gorō refused as someone could be keeping it under surveillance. Until the change of heart came apparent, he would remain at Leblanc as it was unlikely they would search the place again.

Futaba noted that Akechi had gotten a few anonymous messages and one from Shidō. Gorō confirmed that the latter didn’t match Shidō’s writing style. All of the texts asked for situation reports and where he was. He felt it as the best option to not answer as the messages could be later used as evidence.

_He came to a silent conclusion that he should contact Sae-san about that._

’’Akechi?’’ Kurusu called attention to him.

’’Yes?’’

’’Are you hurt? I saw you take quite a blow from Shidō,’’ the other boy asked now that they were alone at the attic again and could freely speak about the Metaverse.

_’’Worrying about others before yourself as always,’’_ Gorō would have spit like minded words, but he restrained himself.

’’Are you speaking in metaphorical or in a physical sense?’’ he requested.

’’Physical, but feel free to vent if it helps,’’ Kurusu offered and Gorō sighed.

_His well being was the least of their worries._

_Just how aggressive Shidō’s men would become now that their leader was gone? Did they know something they didn’t?_

_Their ultimate goal had been to use Metaverse to influence and turn the public in their favor. Just how far had they gotten with the plan or was he still their only plan?_

_For him to break people one by one until..._

’’If you have a concussion Akechi, then I can’t let you fall asleep now,’’ Kurusu kept nagging and Gorō relented. 

\---

’’I don’t see anything. Only bruising and that’s to be expected,’’ Gorō commented after a thorough examination as he was able.

His side was turning a purplish reddish color. It wasn’t the bluish shade of violet that meant excessive internal bleeding. He didn’t feel the pain to be comparable to something being broken. Adrenaline should have stopped working by now, so the detective was confident about his diagnosis.

They didn’t have any time to use healing spells after the battle, so the wounds they had suffered would have to heal naturally with time.

You could only heal the damage inflicted in the Metaverse and once you left it you were stuck in the state you left. That’s also why you couldn’t heal Ryūji’s legs, nor other injuries you had prior entering Metaverse.

’’Let me double check,’’ Kurusu offered and Gorō silently agreed.

Something that Leblanc lacked was mirrors. Only a small one was located in the bathroom.

_No wonder why Kurusu’s hair was always a mess._

Akira checked the back of his head, putting pressure here and there, asking if he felt any pain. He must have taken notes from that doctor Takemi. She probably was his go to doctor after an accident in the Metaverse, or so Gorō speculated.

’’If you stare at my back any longer I will pluck your eyes out,’’ he warned when Akira was finished but the detective still felt eyes burning holes on his skin. Gorō really didn’t like his scar filled body and would rather not have it in-printed to someone else’s memory.

’’Sorry, just- Are those old?’’ Kurusu asked, backing away while the detective pulled his (or technically the other’s) shirt on.

’’Yes. You get scars relatively easy when you don’t have healing skills on your Persona.’’

’’I have had it easy, haven’t I?’’ He nearly sounded sorry for it and Gorō really wasn’t in a mood for another competition who had it worse. He really didn’t like this overly emphatic side of the Phantom thieves’s leader.

’’Still I got something out of it. Learned what way to treat what wounds. What kind of pain meant what. First I was inexperienced which led to these scars. Once I learned to treat them right, the scaring wasn’t as bad,’’ he told Kurusu.

’’So that’s why you dress in layers,’’

Gorō didn’t like the way Kurusu could psychoanalyze him so easily.

’’Wouldn’t want to scare others with my grotesque form.’’ It was a lie, as he was the one that didn’t like staring at them, because they reminded him of all the sloppy mistakes he had made, and had continued to make for far too long. Other people’s opinions came only second. 

’’So all those things you brought from the pharmacy?’’ Kurusu struck true again.

’’Should help them fade faster, yes. Any more questions?’’ Gorō asked with a mocking customer service smile. He was getting really tired of the interrogation.

The other, uncharacteristically, hesitated for a moment.

’’…Some of them look like what you would do to yourself.’’

’’That’s your main concern?’’ he was surprised at such a remark and the implication that Kurusu was worried about him.

’’If you’re so concerned just hide all the knives away,’’ Gorō joked, but Kurusu wasn’t reacting.

_Damn, he was serious._

He couldn’t say he hadn’t been tempted, but ultimately he hadn’t gone through with it.

’’No, I haven’t. These are from my first foster parents. Despite inflicting pain on others, I am not keen on receiving it,’’ Gorō explained.

Only scars that he had inflicted on himself, were the bite marks in his hands. Helped him bear the pain without making noise. Somehow that always made his foster parents more angry even if that must be what they were after. Punishments with no real end goal than make him ’’act better’’. The reason varied so much that he thought they might as well have had no goal.

He just had to bear it until it was over.

Reason why he had taken to wearing gloves even before the whole detective charade, was because he had a bad habit of biting his hands whenever stressed. Gloves or mittens had minimized the damage. 

You couldn’t tell the difference now from small patches of lighter colored skin, but Gorō still would get an impulse to try to scratch the marks away if he stared at them for too long. So he continued to hide them from plain sight whenever possible.

’’I’m sorry,’’ Kurusu muttered looking away from him.

Gorō didn’t know why he was apologizing.

From presuming wrong or what he just said about his parents?

That he felt sorry for him?

Either way he didn’t want to hear it.

’’You have no reason to apologize.’’ He was honestly more annoyed at the other boy for apologizing than prying.

’’I’m sorry,’’ he repeated and Gorō rubbed his forehead in frustration.

’’Don’t become a broken record now. What are you apologizing for?’’

’’I took your revenge away from you.’’

Now frankly Gorō felt offended.

’’Stop it.’’

‘’’But I-’’

‘’’Shut up. If you want me to double check your wounds, then this topic is done,’’ he gave the order, his tone cold, final.

Kurusu obeyed.

\---

Kurusu’s words had hit like a hammer at a nails head.

Gorō really had to start to plan his future now.

But all that filled his head were flashbacks of his mother’s form in the shield. Face twisted to a voiceless scream like she was in excruciating pain. He tried to get rid of the sight, but it came flashing back, until his muddy thoughts reminded him of his mother’s dying face.

He remembered when he had found her mother from the bathroom. He had been hopelessly terrified shaking her lifeless body in vain, screaming her name, until some passerby found them. He had left the front door open. He was lucky in that sense. The neighbors weren’t the kind to care what would take place in that apartment, and without that passerby he might have spent god knows how long with his mother's corpse.

Now when he thought back at that moment, he felt nothing. None of the sadness or the utter despair he felt.

Loneliness he became numb to, but all the other negative emotions he had turned in to anger, a blazing fury that moved him forward.

But now he felt tired. The raging inferno extinguished, his willpower gone.

All that was left was a hole of missed opportunities. He hadn’t spared his energy to anything other than his plan and now it had finally come crashing down all around him.

He had nothing. No goal, no emotional energy to pursue or search for a new one.

_’ ’What you did when you were 17 will be long in the past when you get to adulthood. Even with all the mistakes you have made, you have more than enough time to make up for them’’ _

Like hell will he live to ’’adulthood’’. He’ll spend that life in jail if he is caught, and if he is someday released, he’ll be only old and depressed and just as empty as now.

_’’I-I’m moving forward. I don’t want hear it, because I’m moving forward!’’_

Easy for her to say that. She didn’t do anything wrong. He has.

He has to live with it for the rest of his life.

What could he even move towards? He had nothing.

Nothing.

_’’It’s still not too late. I won’t give up on you, Akechi.’’_

Why?

He had given up on himself.

Why wouldn’t Kurusu?

An insufferable idiot with a naive tendency for altruism.

Gorō wished that everyone would just give up on him.

 **Hate him.** Make this easier for him.

Let him end this suffering.

The black shadow of a cat loomed over him, bringing him away from his ever spiraling thoughts.

’’What?’’ he voiced without as much venom as he intended to.

Morgana settled itself right in front of Gorō’s face and just laid there. He thought of turning around in his temporary bed, but he didn’t find himself caring enough to go through the effort.

’’When Akira came back all beat up and dazed after what the police did to him, I let him hug me while he slept. He thanked me later and said the bruises on his face didn’t swell as much because of it,’’ Morgana spoke calmly.

’’My face isn’t swollen.’’

’’No, but that night was the first time I saw Akira cry,’’ the cat elaborate.

Gorō wanted to ask why would it tell him all this, but then he noticed how much his hands were still shaking in front of him.

_Just like when he had pointed his gun at Shidō._

Carefully he slid his arms around the cat. He couldn’t bring himself to hold it too tight, even if Morgana would have been very vocal and let him know if he had.

It was warm. Soft.

Reminded him of a toy he had had as a child, even if he couldn’t remember what it exactly had been.

Gorō’s breathing became heavy, matching Morgana's.

He felt… safe.

Which was absolutely absurd, as he had just a few hours ago ruminated over about them getting caught or murdered. It was a feeling he couldn’t put into other words. Like a whole world could end around him and he could still face it without faltering at this moment.

This wasn’t even the happiest he had been. Not the saddest nor the maddest.

’’Thank you…’’ he whispered and the cat started to purr under his touch, lulling them both to a peaceful sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Would you look at this not sexualised tending of each other's wounds? I’m ace and can’t write anything sexual, only romantic. You go do it. Don’t @ me. This whole fic will be very wholesome thank you very much. Should I have tagged this asexual then? I don't know.
> 
> Something that isn't talked about with PTSD is that you become numb to trauma. Even if you get flashbacks or talk about your traumatic past you won't breakdown nor possibly feel any of the appropriate emotional responses. Your mind is protecting you. A little like how casually Akechi talked about his trauma in the bathhouse. I kin to that as I have PTSD.
> 
> So about Akechi’s gloves and how his whole demeanor screams to me of child abuse. The way he has a very non confrontational facade and all his negative emotions are combined to Black Mask, talks to me about how he could never express these negative emotions without something preventing him. I say child abuse, because it’s very obvious with foster home(s) and the way he lives alone at the age of 17 (probably since earlier, my guess is since he was 15 as that’s when he has been working with Shidō).
> 
> And to those wondering if this an accurate representation of child abuse, you are valid to question and I appreciate your continued existence. As for the answer, I have experienced my share of it even if not as physical for the most part. That’s why I left it somewhat vague exactly what Akechi experienced, so it’s all up to the reader.
> 
> Also I’m really not the fan of misery or torture porn and rather have my angst with a good balance of fluff. Hopefully it made all this easier to digest.


	13. Trust

Akira woke up to find both Akechi and Morgana gone. He heard the sound of faint talking downstairs so he wasn’t too worried.

When he descended said stairs, he wasn’t expecting Sae Niijima to sit across from Akechi.

’’Hello Kurusu-kun. You seem a lot better now than when I last saw you,’’ she greeted.

’’Yes, thanks to you. Had my share of police brutality for a lifetime,’’ he made an attempt to be funny, but Sae grimaced.

’’I hope it will stay so. I will have to work hard to demolish this corrupted system.’’

’’I’m sure you can Sae-san,’’ Akechi spoke encouragingly.

It was very daunting to see Akechi in his own school uniform.

They were inside so he didn’t need to hide his identity here, but with that practiced smile Akira felt like their time together had been reset. But of course he wouldn’t see a prosecutor in his hoodies.

Akechi had dignity.

He himself would have felt embarrassed in his pajamas if Sae hadn’t seen him already in his worst state; all drugged and beaten up, memories hazy trying to get a grasp on the current situation.

But ultimately it came down to the fact that he had no sense of shame.

’’Good morning. Prosecutor Niijima-san is the first paying customer I have had for a while. Started to feel like a stay at home mother if I had to hold on to the end of the election like this,’’ Sōjirō complained, eyelids closed tightly at the mental image.

’’I think that would suit you,’’ Akira spoke his mind.

’’Stop it and get dressed. No other customers for now, but you should have some decency,’’ Boss was nagging him, further proving his point.

\---

Sae and Akechi were exchanging a lot of information by the tables. At first Akira had eavesdropped in a hope to get the gist of it. Instead what they were exchanging was case names, people and locations that seemed significant only to Sae.

They were sharing important clues, yet Akira couldn’t keep up.

He hadn’t paid attention to mental or psychotic breakdowns before he became a Phantom thief, and even afterwards he had his hands full to not get caught or worrying about going over their given deadlines.

Once Akira had stopped listening, he started to work on his missed studies provided by Ann and Mishima.

Ann’s notes were far from perfect but she had tried. Her English notes were the only exception. Mishima’s notes in turn were all detailed down to the tiniest detail.

Despite his diligent studies, Mishima had also provided them with a new Mementos request. Akira really should thank him in person. Maybe he should give him that tape that Futaba had used as Shidō’s calling card? The Phanboy would probably love that.

He tuned out of the conversation the duo had in the background, but Akira found himself listening to Akechi’s voice.

Sae’s voice reminded him too much of the interrogation room that he had been held, while this soft spoken Akechi he had good associations with.

It had a pleasant tone to it. Calm and nearly melodic.

Something that didn’t lull you to sleep, but neither demanded your undivided attention. Something you would listen to if you couldn’t watch cat videos.

Okay, that sounded creepy.

And now Akira was distracting himself.

’’Yo! Futaba Sakura has spawned,’’ Futaba marched through the door and was quick to noticed the investigation duo. ’’Wow, they're still at it.’’

’’You knew about the Sae’s visit before hand?’’ Akira felt left out of the loop.

’’Yup. I have something she asked from me,’’ she answered and held out a memory disc and Akechi’s phone.

’’Hello Futaba-chan. I appreciate your help.’’ Sae accepted them and placed them into a plastic bag meant for evidence.

’’No prob. I also have a backup of it. It’s still hacked, so the location is off and I have disabled the request to delete anything without my consent,’’ Futaba explained.

’’Thank you. Once I take Shidō to court, you have to undo it. I can’t use tainted evidence,’’ she requested.

’’Don't worry, I’m professional. No traces of hacking shall remain when I'm done,’’ the young hacker promised.

Sae looked deeply concerned when she heard that piece of information.

’’That’s… quite worrying.’’

Akechi chuckled.

’’Even without that phone, I have only given you half of the evidence in my possession. Surely that will be more than enough.’’

’’Still? I have to say I’m impressed.’’ Sae seemed pleased.

’’As my only goal in life had been to see Shidō suffer, then it’s only natural.’’

Sae clearly didn't know how to react to that and coughed before putting down her coffee cup.

’’Well then. It’s getting late, I should be going. Oh, and here Akechi.’’ She pulled something from her bag.

’’A phone?’’ Akechi didn’t seem to have asked for it as he examined the model with intrigue.

’’Yours is now evidence. I will be in contact regarding what you have told me,’’ Sae spoke.

’’Thank you Sae-san.’’ The detective accepted the gift with a polite bow.

’’You have to rejoin the group chat now!’’ Futaba happily took out her phone.

’’That’s your main concern?’’ Akechi forced a laugh.

’’I think you have earned it Gorō-chan*,’’ Akira teased.

’’…If this is your plan to get me to call you ’’Akira’’ it won’t work,’’ Akechi studied unimpressed.

’’You just did,’’ Akira affirmed.

’’Call me ’’chan’' one more time and I’ll shoot you for real this time,’’ Akechi was smiling dangerously sweetly.

Akira lifted his hands into the air as a sign of a surrender.

\---

They had done all they could with Shidō and all that was left was to wait.

Akira could see that Akechi was taking this the hardest. It was only the second night after their infiltration and he kept re-checking his new phone for missed notifications from Sae’s investigation. Akira sensed the leaking impatience.

’’Nothing is going to change even if you keep on opening it,’’ he stated.

’’Are you sure I’m not just waiting for a note that’ll let me kill you,’’ Akechi bit back.

’’You don’t need permission to do that. And it’s a tad too late for you to pretend to be the bad guy when you saved me back at Shidō’s Palace,’’ Akira joined the quarrel.

’’Saved you? I just helped you take him down, that hardly counts,’’ the other refuted.

’’It does for me. I was… scared,’’ he admitted.

Akechi stared at him in silence, searching for a give away of a lie.

’’When?’’

’’When we got scattered by Shidō,’’ Akira answered.

’’Worried for your teammates as usual then,’’ Akechi said it like it was a bad thing, but he shook his head.

’’No. Scared, but that wasn’t my main worry at the time.’’

’’What was it then?’’ the detective asked, clearly tired of circling around the topic.

’’That I would be left alone,’’ he gave in and somehow saying it out loud made it seem silly, but it was everything but that to Akira.

When Akechi had first spoken of how they were similar, he had thought that the other boy had referenced how both of them were lonely.

Akira had been isolated his whole life until he got transferred to Shūjin high school, and there he had been shunned because of his new found reputation as a criminal. He had always felt alone. Even when he got to know other people, became friends with them, in the back of his mind he felt a terrible sense of dread.

Like he could be abandoned at any time.

He projected that Akechi felt the same, as despite their first meeting lasting only a short while, he had asked to exchange contact information with him. Even when busy, he would spend it with Akira who he, at the time, hardly knew nothing about and spent his energy to get to know him.

And the further he got to know Akechi, the stronger the feeling got.

He was just like Akira, even when he was surrounded by other people and fans, because the feeling of loneliness didn’t mean that it would be dispelled just by the presence of other people.

That’s also why Akechi’s betrayal, that had been anticipated yes, hadn’t really hurt Akira in any meaningful way. Because that’s what he expected from others.

**That all his relationships were artificial.**

Must be the low self-esteem talking or the lingering experience after he was deemed criminal. Thrown away once he had served his use, without second thoughts. Only as good as his performance.

_Maybe that’s why he over-performed and would adapt to others instead of having them match him?_

When Akira had been separated from the others even if for a short while, the thought had crossed his mind.

That he was alone now.

It was enough to throw Joker off his game. He might have broken down, if Akechi hadn’t appeared when he did.

Said detective still hadn’t commented, and Akira thought he might not believe him.

’’Is that so impossible to imagine?’’ he asked, but Akchi denied it.

’’No…’’ He had said it quietly, eyes averted, and Akira was pretty sure he didn’t mean it.

’’I’m a human as much as everyone else Akechi,’’ he wanted the other wild card to believe in him. To see his stupid flaws, despite the fear of rejection. He wanted to improve, be the confident version of himself that Joker was. Someone whom he would be able to show his weakness without hesitation so you wouldn’t know if it was just a bluff. Be able to overlook it, accept himself and grow.

’’Gorō,’’ Akechi corrected, and Akira let out a confused sound.

’’Huh?’’

’’I said I didn’t want you to use chan with my name,’’ he repeated his words from earlier today, and when Akira caught on his meaning, he felt all warm inside.

’’Right. Thanks Gorō. For saving me and all that.’’

’’…You’re welcome Akira,’’ he confirmed their exchange.

Ake- Gorō was making Akira feel things that he would rather not deal with right now.

Like wanting to squish him into a really tight hug at this very instant.

**Reversed Justice has found its purpose and will now guide thou.**

**None shall be lost again in their lead.**

**It’s duty and loyalty bestow onto thou.**

**They will become the sword to cut thou chains to free from thy from thou fate.**

\---

The new task in the Mementos was an option, but more than that all of them needed to a break from all the action after Shidō. As such Akira had brought Gorō, the anxious detective, to Shibuya. He was fidgeting to the smallest of loud noises still on the edge that someone would come for their life.

He must not be used to things going well for once, and the thought made Akira want to help him see things the opposite.

’’Why are we here?’’ Gorō finally asked, because Akira hadn’t stated anything about the purpose of their journey. Otherwise he would have probably refused, or argued it was a waste of time to calm his nerves. He would have rather built up a fortress in Leblanc waiting for a bomb to drop.

’’Don’t you need something? It’s been nearly a week since you have moved in,’’ Akira dodged the question with his own and the detective squinted his eyes, not impressed about the word choice.

’’Moved in?’’

’’I can ask Sōjirō to adopt you too,’’ he suggested, but Gorō looked disgusted.

’’Please don’t. I don’t want to be, in some sense, brothers with you.’’

He felt extremely happy that his temporary roommate thought so.

’’We went to that cafe when we had our first date.’’

’’Didn’t think I would have to wear disguises provided by you ever again back then,’’ Gorō sighed. He wasn't wearing glasses and his hair wasn’t messed up like back then. Yet wearing a hoodie and a cap was so different from how he usually dressed, that people didn’t give him more than a glance.

’’I have you all to myself so I’m happy,’’ Akira hummed satisfied.

’’Don’t get used to it,’’ Gorō warned.

They were passing by the corner to the backstreet that led to the Airsoft.

In a dark alley shone the door to the Velvet room and Akira got an idea.

’’Gorō, do you trust me?’’

’’…Why are you asking?’’ he asked right away, suspicious.

’’Please answer, I want to try something?’’

’’…Fine.’’

Akira smiled and took Akechi by the hand.

’’And this is necessary?’’ he didn’t straight up reject him which, to the trickster, was progress.

’’Absolutely.’’ Akira nodded with what might be a little too much enthusiasm.

Detective rolled his eyes, but let Akira guide him.

When they were by the Velvet room's door, Gorō was squinting his eyes towards it.

’’What do you see?’’ Akira asked like he did when requesting Chihaya for a tarot reading.

’’Butterflies, but that-’’

’’Is weird? If this works you’ll see something even more bizarre. I’m trying to take you to a place that gave me the power of the wild card, the power to use multiple Personas. I’m not sure how it’ll work, so just. Stay close,’’ he advised and Gorō's mind just seemed even more filled with questions.

’’This sounds completely lunatic, but I suppose I’ll humor you.’’

’’Great.’’ Akira took a step into the blue void.

\---

He was in the same cell, but no red lights and no Gorō to be seen, just like no Morgana in his disappeared bag.

Akira felt disappointed he had read the signs wrong. But if he had been right, it would have meant that Igor would have lied. He and this place are supposed to be a neutral zone of sorts, so if he had lied-

’’Do you need something inmate?’’ Justine asked.

Twins and Igor were there. Time never seemingly moving in this space.

’’No, just dropped by to say, hi,’’ he lied.

’’Learn some manners inmate-!’’ Caroline shouted, but Akira had already stepped outside the room.

’’-have to-! Akira, where the hell were you!?’’

Akira came across a scene of Gorō and Morgana arguing.

That was a new reaction from the detective.

’’Akira has been here the whole time! Why are you freaking out?’’ Morgana meowed in distress.

’’He wasn’t! He just vanished to oblivion, out of existence. You must have just missed it with your cat eyes,’’ he dismissed.

’’Hey, I’m not a cat! And Akira has been here the whole time. He’s carrying me! I’m at his back so I should know,’’ Mona pointed out.

’’No, you were just, floating in the air- Akira where were you?’’ Gorō groaned with frustration as their visions of reality didn’t line up.

’’In the Velvet room. Sorry, it seems I can’t take you there,’’ he apologized for the stress he had brought to his friend even if his intent had been completely opposite.

’’What is this _Velvet room_?’’ he demanded and Akira began explaining.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *You probably already know it, but calling someone -chan is cute and reserved usually for young girls. Sometimes close friends use it for nicknames or to refer to their pets for example.
> 
> Fun fact is that, as you might have noticed, Akechi uses -san to refer to all girls we see him interacting with. Which is higher in a scale terms of respect compared to -kun, which he uses when referring to guys his age (Kitagawa-kun, Amamiya-kun etc.) Akechi says to respect women.


	14. Redemption

Velvet room sounded like a very convoluted place. When Gorō had asked why Akira hadn’t told anyone, he came to understand Morgana’s reaction. Others couldn’t see anything out of the ordinary so he had kept it to himself.

It made Gorō feel somewhat special that he could both notice the difference, and that Akira trusted him with it.

Morgana either couldn’t keep up on their conversation or had just bland out ignored them. Cat’s small brains must be affecting it or something else.

Akira called their ability to wield multiple Personas _the power of a wild card_ . Something that came from a contract with _Velvet room_ ; a place that Joker described as a jail with weird attendants of a pair of twins and a goblin like an old man, where he could fuse, sacrifice and summon Personas. It was all too bizarre for even him to make up as he went on, yet he didn’t know all the details that Gorō tried to ask.

_Why did they have this power of a wild card?_

_Do they gain something from gifting both of them with such power?_

_Why could only Akira access it?_

There were too many logically unexplained factors in his story, but the Gorō found himself at some level considering it all as fact. His own emotions might be clouding his judgement, but there was nothing to lose with humoring his friend.

_...A friend?_

He was turning too trusting, yet this false sense of security was all that still kept him moving at this very moment. Kept him holding on to the edge of a cliff and not letting go. Not falling to the never ending dark abyss below.

A small token of gratitude he won’t admit loud, but he’ll do something to repay it eventually.

\---

When they got back, Gorō received a message from Sae-san.

Her investigation was going smoothly. He had warned her to thread carefully and so far she hadn’t let her hot-headed temper get the better of her.

It was still unbelievable that Sae-san had changed by herself and not gone through the change of heart. When Akira had explained in detail how they had staged the theft of her treasure, Gorō was impressed. Very outlandish plan but it had somehow worked, despite few things going wrong along the way. Luck was a factor in all kinds of gambles and they had won.

Gorō himself had a complicated relationship with Sae Niijima. At first he thought nothing of her. Just a prosecutor within an already corrupted system. He knew her boss, now ex-boss (as he was now dead by Crow's own hand), had worked for Shidō, so by extension Sae-san also worked for him. Thus Gorō had deemed her untrustworthy like so many other people.

She had been assigned to psychotic and mental breakdowns, and thus it fell on him to give her insight on them. What it meant to him in other words was to lead her astray. 

He always tried to twist such assignments to his advantage, so instead he had tried to make Sae-san a neutral party and not another one of Shidō's paws. He would drop hints of truth to every case and see if she caught on. She would, and every time she came to discuss those hints with Gorō who would deny them. He couldn't be too obvious about his intentions because otherwise he might have been caught and his revenge ploy ruined. 

She clung to those leads despite his input, and that's what ultimately had led him to start placing his trust on to Sae-san. She didn’t let other people’s opinions sway her, whether they were below or above her. 

One might say that was just arrogance, but Gorō saw that as justice.

Not him, like Akira had said, but Sae-san with her unbending principles.

She hadn’t been motivated with pleasing others or even with fame or money. She talked about how she wanted to provide for her sister and that was enough. So it broke what little scraps of hope Gorō had on the world when Sae-san started to give up on those principles under the pressure from her boss.

And in extension Shidō.

She hadn’t given in to fame, money or power, but success. It only made sense, as she wanted to provide for her sister and if her credibility would be tainted, she couldn’t do that.

Gorō had tried to joke or to lessen her burden by taking over some of her cases and keep providing her with the small sprinkles of truth hidden from plain sight, but she didn’t bother to search them anymore. Even when he bland out said that deaths weren’t caused by the Phantom thieves, she ignored it because the higher ups wanted to wrap up the case quickly.

She had been right under her bosses thumb where they wanted her and Gorō was both disappointed and angry.

But now she had returned back to her original self, ready to prosecute the possibly new prime minister. Gorō felt grateful to Akira about that.

How he had managed to bring her back just with a single conversation with her, was a mystery. Undoubtedly because of his charisma, but persuasion would have had to be incredibly hard with his state at the time.

It made Gorō re-evaluate himself. How if he had just had one deep conversation with Sae-san and been honest, maybe he could have done the same.

But he hadn’t, too self-absorbed on his revenge and had given up on her once she had made her opinion known.

Unlike Akira.

’’Did Sae finally answer?’’ Akira asked, curious.

’’Yes,’’ Gorō answered and shut his phone.

’’Good. Hope you calm down for now,’’ Phantom thieves’s leader offered nonchalantly and went back to reading a big book on the code of bushidō.

Gorō’s mind was still racing. Bad scenarios popping up one after another. All of them leading to more and more gruesome deaths by the hands of Shidō or his men.

He hated the lack of control he had.

’’…How do you handle this waiting period?’’ 

’’Me? Just distracting myself with everything I can think of. The less room you give for the thoughts the better.’’ It was spoken like it was no big deal.

’’Sounds like a pain.’’

’’But it works. How about we go to Mementos tomorrow? I got another request ready and waiting for approval.’’ Akira turned to him questioning.

’’You’re…’’ Gorō didn’t finish.

All the insults tasted sweet on his lips, leaking of fondness, and he realized that honestly Akira deserved better. A lot better than what he was giving him.

He had gone through unfair life but held his head high, and Gorō didn’t feel bitter about it anymore.

Akira had shown that he could be like that too. To be able to change.

There were no more one-sided grudges.

Just two similar, yet very different boys in the attic of a vintage cafe.

’’Didn’t catch that Gorō.’’

’’We can. You don’t need to ask me for approval, you’re the leader,’’ he huffed.

\---

With his new phone Gorō had decided to do something that was long overdue.

He had asked both girls to come together ahead of their planned meeting. He knew Sakura would have felt too nervous if he had asked them to come separated.

_Or maybe it was just his newly awakened conscience talking._

Morgana and Akira were off to prepare for the trip to the Mementos which had left Gorō alone for the first time after Shidō’s palace. He still didn’t think he deserved the trust, but he would like to believe in Akira’s words about having saved him. That he had manage to repay at least something to his rival, that had somewhere along the line had become a friend even.

The three souls met at Leblanc, their hideout as usual, where there was none that could eavesdrop. 

’’Hello Akechi-kun. You asked us to come?’’ Okumura greeted politely.

’’Where is everyone else?’’ Sakura asked.

’’Akira is still preparing for our trip to Mementos, but before that I wanted to speak to you,’’ Gorō spoke.

The heir to one of the biggest corporations in Japan seemed to get what’s going on, while the hacker was high strung in anticipation.

’’I want to apologize to you for all that I have put you through.’’ He bowed deeply, like offering for decapitation.

’’Wowowowow! Akechi, raise your head! Your pretty boy status is leaking with your bow like the water from kappa’s head*,’’ the hacker panicked.

’’You called us for an apology? I have already forgiven you since you kept your promise. You didn’t kill Shidō even if it must have been hard. Yet I still appreciate hearing the words directly from you,’’ Okumura chuckled seemingly pleased.

’’Haru, how can you be so calm? What, wait- I-I just have to accept and he’ll stop? I accept! You are forgiven! Be gone, you’re out of character!’’ Sakura flailed her hands in a fury.

’’Glad we can agree on that. That was just for the formalities, I’ll let my actions speak louder.’’ Gorō raised his head.

’’Oh? What do you have prepared for us?’’ Okumura wondered.

’’Ooo! Is it sushi? Early Christmas cake**?’’ Sakura made extravagant guesses and Gorō shook his head.

’’I’m planning on turning myself in after Shidō’s change of heart.’’

’’What?’’ Sakura stumbled on her place while Okumura’s eyes widened.

’’You shouldn’t be surprised. I was his right hand man, even if I was ultimately just used. I have been talking to the Sae-san and I’ll be testifying against him in court. In exchange I’ll get a lighter sentence, but I hope it’s still long enough to satisfy you.’’ Gorō smirked.

’’No Akechi-kun we… wouldn’t think that.’’ Okumura looked sorry.

’’I-I don’t want you to go to jail! Akira was beaten by cops and they could do the same to you or worse! And you're my gaming buddy… No, no…’’ Sakura shook her head violently.

How could they have let themselves become attached to him after everything he had done? 

They should be overjoyed, but they must be better people than him. 

_Able to forgive and move on._

They didn’t take pleasure from others' pain, to see them suffer the same way they had.

Not like him.

’’This is what I have chosen. This is my justice, not just for you but for all the others I have wronged. I just wanted you to be first to know,’’ Gorō explained.

Honestly he still didn’t comprehend it. Still couldn’t completely empathize with all of those he killed.

He had justified his doings for so long that just thinking objectively was hard.

But Sakura and Okumura had shown it to him.

That even if those he had killed had deserved it, it still created a domino effect. He would hurt those unrelated.

Made them experience the same taste of despair he had.

And even if he still believed this world was an unfair place where the strong stomped all over the weak, he didn't want to be the one to crush those under him anymore. To continue the circle of agony.

’’You haven’t told Akira?’’ Okumura asked.

Gorō was lightly taken back.

’’No. I’ll tell him and the others when it’ll be relevant. We don’t know if and when Sae-san will take this case to court. Just something you can keep against me from backing out.’’

_And something to also keep himself from going back on his word._

\---

At Mementos Gorō came to the same conclusion again; he could never help others.

Even with two Personas he held, he knew he could never learn to heal. He was born to cause only pain to those around him.

Like Sakamoto with restless and unpredictable thunder.

Like Kitagawa with ruthless and beautiful ice.

Like Okumura with sound waves that broke one's mental barriers not visually seen, but hidden.

Takamaki was a little like him, burning everything on her path with fire. Only able to ease the pain but not completely heal it with a spell Diarama. A power to endure suffering.

Gorō himself wielded a twisted form of Loki bearing madness from the deepest void where no light could normally reach, and Robin Hood who brought a single ray of hope. That small hint of light being enough to bring forward power to help those already fallen down, but unable to do anything to the pain around him; Samarecarm.

_J_

_ust like how he could tell himself to get up only when he had already been beaten down over and over again, unable to stop the source of the hurt. Just a helpless child in a could world of adults._

He noted that the assigned healers of the team all had something in common.

Sakura was eccentric to say the least, yet she was a type of cheerleader. Tuned her moods to match others like it was natural and enhancing them with power required to face any situation. Yet she was unable to provide it all the time, as she grew tired easily.

It must been a side effect of her time in recluse.

Niijima was a class president, bearing responsibility of the school, but also at home with Sae-san. Someone who had to become strong. She tried to live as to not be a burden preferring to do everything by herself.

She was a constant support, even when not in the main team. She would continued to provide back up and analyse the enemy as to not lose a single moment to be in control. She casts explosions of power like plasma from Frei spells, and her ability to heal was divided equal to everyone in battle or to one who needed it the most.

Morgana was hard as always to get a read on. A weird shape shifting cat and it's healing abilities extended outside the Metaverse. Relaxing purring, an attitude to pick up all the social cues missed by untrained eyes and the ability to act the best possible way considering the situation. It wielded the power of wind spells to blow enemies away and keep them away from allies. Healing spells always included all, even if it left the cat tired itself. 

Honestly Gorō still had a hard time comprehending the creature whether to treat it as a cat or another creature entirely, but couldn’t hate it after it had kept his multiple nervous breakdown episodes between just the two of them.

Then there was Akira Kurusu. Someone who wielded all the elements and ability to heal as great, if not greater, than Morgana. Someone who tended to let all other people vent their problems to him, while not expecting anything in return.

It irritated Gorō greatly.

Of all these people that could just be using Akira and him being fine with it.

He got tired quickly when leading everyone, but would chuck down energy drinks when he didn’t have any coffee left. A total idiot without any instinct of self-preservation, but if anyone else got tired or hurt, he would switch the party out or retrieve for today. 

_He should really take care of himself instead._

Joker cast another Mediarahan on everyone. A soft spell like a warm wind if you were cold, and a chilling one if you were overheating. Wounds around Gorō’s arms closed without leaving scars.

He slayed the last shadow with a swing of his saber, after which Joker patted Crow on the shoulder proud and posed him an important question.

’’Isn’t it time for you to officially join the Phantom thieves? We have talked about it within the team, and would like to continue to rely on your strength in the future.’’

Gorō shouldn’t have been shaken by the question.

Yes, after Shidō's change of heart there would still be many others to take his place, all conspiring to use the Metaverse to their advantage.

And their job surely wouldn’t end there. There waited a life of punishing unjust with their powers unobtainable for anyone else.

They would be modern day superheroes in the dark.

Something he had dreamed of doing one day as a child. A very tempting offer which is exactly why he rejected it.

’’I won’t. I can’t join your team.’’

The new path he had chosen, was one that was absent of his own personal wishes.

The complete opposite of his original one.

It was a path chosen out of obligation to his new justice, not one of his own feelings.

He didn’t want them to lead him astray anymore.

He couldn’t trust himself, even if Akira did.

’’I figured. The just detective wouldn’t cooperate with thieves,’’ his leader spoke with a hint of disappointment in his tone.

’’Yet I have,’’ Crow said.

_And much worse crimes_.

’’Either way I won’t question it. I’m still counting on you outside our battles,’’ Joker spoke and Gorō hated himself for how he yearned to take his words back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Kappa= A yokai (spirit or demon) that lives in ponds or somewhere with water. It carries a plate on its head, and when it bows, the water from it head falls to the ground resulting it losing all its energy. It then has to be carried back to a water source by someone or the kappa is in trouble. This way humans can trick it, so it owns them favors because kappa must bow if someone bows to it.
> 
> **Christmas cake = Literally just a strawberry shortcake because it’s white and red which are Christmas colors. Japan doesn’t really get the cultural context, so yeah.
> 
> Kept listening to Lyn – Dark sun while writing this. Truly Akeshu/Shuake in its glory.


	15. Ominous

When the morning came the duo of ex-enemies were having breakfast together. A routine that Akira wouldn’t mind continuing even after Shidō would confess his sins.

Akira took note of the melancholic look of the detective next to him, who seemed to search something in the depths of his drink. He had seemed weird since yesterday, even before they went to Mementos. More closed up, just the way he had initially been after Joker had brought his unconscious body to Leblanc.

Gorō had just begun to smile more often but now his face remained blank again. (Yet this was better for Akira's heart, which would stop every time it happened.)

Something had happened, but he trusted Gorō to tell him later. To take his time.

Instead of calling attention to his odd behavior, Akira took the save route and dodged the topic.

’’What do you want to do tomorrow? We still have nearly 2 weeks worth of waiting and time to kill ahead of us.’’

Gorō sipped his coffee in contemplation.

’’You do know that you can spend your time with others that don’t include me?’’

’’Yes, and I choose you.’’

The other boy’s face twisted with anger.

’’Why?’’

’’Do we have to go over the talk again, how despite everything, I still think of you as a friend?’’

 _And he might feel things that are a little different from a friend towards him,_ but that thought is left unsaid.

’’You deserve a second chance.’’ Akira settled on.

’’No, don’t make this about me. I’m talking about you,’’ Gorō turned his piercing eyes on to him.

_’’_ _Did he caught on?’’_ Akira panicked internally.

’’What about me?’’

Playing dumb was his specialty, even if the chances of success were slim when trying it on someone as perceptive as the detective before him.

’’You always put everyone's well being ahead of your own. And I’m... I know I can be hard to deal with. Don’t you need alone time or spend it with someone a little more stable? Morgana can watch me. Don’t you have other things you rather do?’’

The trickster sighed in relief.

Even if Gorō was too smart for his own good, the matters of the heart were still out of his reach. Which was a sad thought in of itself.

’’To all your questions, the answer is no. I’m still dead officially, but I do talk to everyone I need to through messages,’’ he reassured.

’’These are your ’’confidants’’? Wouldn’t it be better for them to actually see you alive and well?’’ Gorō interpreted, inviting more room to argue.

It was like the other wanted him gone, away from him, which was unusual. Akira hadn’t heard Gorō to shout at him to leave him alone, ever. Even at his worst.

Maybe he was just… worried for Akira?

He had shown similar kind of care before in this round-about way. It's what Futaba would have called _a tsundere_ , but it was far more complicated than that.

Gorō had spoken about wanting to be special, to fulfill his revenge and hating their group’s concept of friendship.

He hated pity, that he had made clear. Despising the concept of licking each other's wounds, nor wanting to hear Akira apologize for any bad things he had gone through.

Yet Gorō’s cognitive version had spoken about wanting to feel needed and loved.

Both could be true or neither, as they were spoken by unreliable narrators. First spoken in a fit of rage and the second from Shidō’s point of view.

Finding the middle ground gave Akira a great idea.

’’I know. We can go see Chihaya today, if that makes you happy. She's a fortune teller at Shinjuku and would love to gain a new customer.’’

’’You're missing the point. She would rather see you alone.’’

An immediate rejection.

’’We either go see her together or not at all. Those are my rules, pick your poison,’’ he refused to yield and Gorō closed his eyes and took a deep breath.

’’…Fine. Let’s go see your fortune teller friend.’’

Akira smiled in satisfaction.

\---

Chihaya nearly abandoned her seat to run to Akira.

’’Akira-kun! I shouldn’t yell it so loud now should I…? But I’m glad to see you in person. You managed to avoid death,’’ she lowered her voice to contain her delight.

’’Thanks to your warning,’’ he acknowledged.

’’It was nothing. Can I ask, are you perhaps Akechi Gorō in the flesh?’’ Chihaya turned her attention to the boy next to him.

She must be a fan if she could recognize Gorō even in disguise. Or maybe the disguise was just poor and nobody wanted to talk to a detective wearing such ’’unflattering’’ clothes.

Akechi didn’t even bother to bring out his charismatic act full force while introducing himself. Instead it was sloppy, an imitation, or maybe Akira just could tell the differences in the other’s mood by now.

’’Yes. I heard from my friend you make accurate fortunes.’’

’’Yes, indeed I do. Please take a seat. I’ll ask the cards about your future.’’

Gorō complied and Akira took his time to secure their environment. Chihaya’s small booth was located at the side street and it was still the middle of the day. None of her usual clients were in sight and he presumed it was safe. Those rare people who got off early from work tented to went straight to home, as they consist mostly of those who were working a night shift.

Chihaya spread all 78 cards and drew 5.

Tower.

Devil.

Fool.

Judgement.

Death.

She seemed speechless for a second, even Akira’s grim future hadn’t left her in such a state.

’’Um… I haven’t drawn so many major arcana* in a reading before. Usually I build the foundation from the major one and small ones around it.’’ she stumbled on.

’’All of your past beliefs are crumbling down. Someone will or is already controlling your choices, yet all this only the beginning. Judgement is waiting for you, and depending what you choose, it could lead to your death,’’ she paused to think of any advice to give.

It sounded worse than Akira’s simple ’’death is coming.’’ The thought that the detective was still someone’s puppet left him feeling sick.

Gorō in turn seemed unfazed by all this.

’’Your turn Akira.’’

Chihaya let out a panicked noise as the detective rose up without a worry.

’’But what about-’’ Akira began to question, but Gorō spoke over him.

’’You expect me to believe this? I want to see how you’ll fare compared to me.’’

’’You're allowed to not believe this, of course… But no matter, Akira-kun was one that taught me you can change your own fate. I’m sure you can too, Akechi-kun.’’ Chihaya brought her hands together.

Of course the logical detective didn’t believe in fortune telling, honestly Akira was silly to think otherwise.

For him she drew two major one’s.

Lovers and the devil.

And Three minor ones.

Ten of cups, Three of pentacles, Five of wands.

’’I see… It seems you’ll have a wonderful time with your friends and loved ones. Even if there seems to be a bit of conflict with someone or a few of them.’’

’’Don’t we all?’’ Akira mused.

’’Fair point,’’ she laughed and continued. ’’You’ll find a new connection or strengthen already existing one. A romantic or platonic partner, your future together is yet to be determined. As for the negative, I see you’ll be tested in the future. It tests to see if you give into temptation. As you are now Akira-kun, I’m sure you’ll choose wisely and not give in.’’

’’I won’t. Thank you Chihaya-san,’’ he thanked and turned to Gorō. ’’How did I compare to you?’’

The detective dismissively flung his hand.

’’You don’t seem to have a clue what she's referring to.’’

’’I’ll know when it happens.’’

The answer didn’t satisfy the other.

’’Then I see no point in this fortune telling.’’

’’But you get to brace yourself beforehand, I think it’s valuable,’’ he countered.

Gorō clicked his tongue in dismay, and Chihaya’s voice called out carefully.

’’Don’t argue now…’’

’’No, no. This is how we usually talk,’’ Akira assured and tugged Gorō by his arm dragging him away from the scene.

’’We’ll go now, thanks as always. I’ll be sure to bring Gorō when he’s not as grumpy,’’ he chirped between the detective hissing to release him.

Chihaya froze for a moment like she put two pieces together.

’’Y-yes! Have a safe trip home!’’

\---

Next few days Akira went out with Gorō.

Chihaya’s reaction had convinced him to at least show his face to everyone he hadn’t seen already. He had already gone to Airsoft shop when getting gear for their Mementos trip and Iwai had a subtle reaction of only giving him a knowing smirk.

Ohya had seen Akira and Gorō together before at the aquarium and offered to buy them a drink exchange for an interview, which, of course, Lala refused. Thus they got water and not alcohol, and the journalist's loud nature guaranteed they didn’t get disturbed during their stay.

Tōgō’s surprise turned quickly to controlled joy. She offered for them to play as a team against her in shōgi. With the two of them Akira felt like they actually stood on the even ground, but she ultimately crumbled their defense apart in a long game of stalling.

Shinya was confused how Akechi Gorō, the arch nemesis of the Phantom thieves, spent time with Akira at the arcade. Same reaction was shared with Mishima, but that was soon forgotten as he got the hold of the copy of Phantom thieves recorded broadcast they had used as a calling card. He assured he would treasure it forever.

Yoshida didn’t want to draw attention to him in the middle of his speech, but he acknowledged their presence with a hidden message coded in his words.

Akira couldn’t get a hold of Maruki, but the Councillor must have been busy with his new thesis.

It only afterwards crossed his mind that Gorō had been so far the only one, not including Mona, who knew nearly everyone he was involved with. The other wild card hadn’t judged him or his company, not voicing even a question how he got to know them all. In hindsight it made sense. What Akira had gathered from Gorō, he associated mostly with adults, not keeping close ties with anyone other than Phantom thieves that were his age. So it would be hypocritical of him to question who Akira spent his time with, even people many years older and younger than him.

Yet Akira felt... accepted.

It was a weird feeling as it should be obvious that Gorō or any of his friends wouldn’t mind his associates. He ran it to them from time to time while spending time with someone else. 

But he couldn't help it.

Akira didn’t enjoy connecting too many of his associates with each other, because were there to be a disagreement or an argument with them, it could affect his other relationships.

Like a ripple effect.

Just like when he first had had familiars who believed he was innocent in the crime he was falsely prosecuted for, and yet when the group he had been part of turned against him, they changed their mind. All too easily they had turned their backs to him, the trust they had sworn gone. Cast aside, while his friend group had continued without him.

Isolated and rejected.

Akira hated the feeling more than anything.

He wanted to avoid the chances of that happening at all cost, yet he had shared a small part of his world with Gorō. He was torn about it.

Did he want the other to know the significance of what this meant for Akira? Or continue to act in his false bravado that his actions were nothing out of the usual?

He didn't know.

\---

Futaba and Ryūji had insisted on initiating operation ’’game night’’ where everyone invited themselves over to Leblanc. The boss didn’t seem to mind, yet Akira felt paranoid for no reason.

_What if Gorō offhandedly mentioned what they had done the past few days?_

_What if everyone started to ask questions?_

_What if they judged him of not being loyal to them? Of seeking more than he deserved, clinging to anyone who showed him a hint of kindness, of making connections just for the sake of it?_

_He would have to explain he just didn’t want to be abandoned again. Not after what he had happened. But that made it sound like he didn’t trust them. Which he did and yet-_

’’Your turn Akira,’’ Yūsuke reminded and Akira methodically placed his cards on the table.

Futaba threw the last of her cards on top.

’’Yes! I placed first, even over Joker!’’

’’Not bad Futaba. You placed second on the overall results,’’ Makoto counted the score points and the hacker girl cheered.

’’Yeah! I’m on a roll!’’

Akira feigned a laugh.

’’I’m not feeling best today. I’ll let someone else take over.’’

’’No worrie’. I’ll take over,’’ Ryūji took his place at the table.

’’After this match let’s switch out,’’ Makoto announced.

’’I could switch out now, if you want to join Akira?’’ Haru offered her seat with their own game corner with Ann, Gorō and Morgana.

’’You can go ahead and continue. I’ll catch some fresh air,’’ he said and felt the detective’s eyes look through his very soul.

’’Don’t stay for too long,’’ Morgana meowed and Akira waved as a response.

Sōjirō was reading downstairs not minding the hassle upstairs.

The owner was able to open the store during the short time they left to make rounds at the city. Akira was feeling bad how the business might have suffered because of it, but Boss had shrugged his concern aside and noted how Akechi was opening up. They seemed to have some nice conversations while Akira was still out cold sleeping, but covered it with a complaint _’’how kids these days were too smart for their own good.’’_

’’We aren’t too loud?’’ Akira made sure.

’’No. I can still hear my own thoughts just fine. Until the closing time comes, I’m sure that the neighbors won’t mind.’’ Boss turned a page.

’’Got it. You’re the best Boss,’’ he sang his praises.

’’Stop it. Go or do whatever you were suppose to do here.’’

\---

The outside was cold. Winter was drawing near but to Akira it really didn’t bother him. He used to live in the Tōhoku district of Yamagata, more specifically in Sendai which was located north, closer to Hokkaido district than Kanto. In the opposite, he might end up walking with his jacket open when the school would force them to wear them.

Before a bitter memory of his home town overtook him, he replayed the faces of his new friends here.

Akira was glad everyone was getting along. In groups, when his Joker Persona wasn’t leading, he never felt as confident in his social skills. He ended up talking less in groups preferring to talk to people one on one, but loved seeing his friends enjoying themselves. It made him happy to just watch from the sidelines.

Morgana had started sleeping with Gorō every other night. Akira never could have guessed those two would connect so well, but was more than happy to be wrong.

Yet now that Mona’s weight was absent on his shoulder, it left him feeling weird, just like when he had been taken to the police station.

Ominous.

The two devil cards that both of the wild cards had received popped to his mind. Taunting that something was still looming, waiting to prey on them in the future not far-off. 

The walk wasn’t fulfilling its purpose as the one to give him peace, so Akira stopped by a nearby convenience store. It was warm and the noise of people around him gave his head less space to think.

\---

When Akira returned, Gorō was seated by the cafe's counter observing something in front of him.

’’You're back.’’

’’I’m home honey,’’ familiar words left his lips.

’’If you thought the second time I would have a different reaction, you're mistaken,’’ an indifferent answer from the detective.

’’Not at all,’’ he hummed.

’’What do you have there?’’ Akira nudged his head towards the wooden box the other boy held.

’’A chess board.’’

’’Honestly I had forgotten I owned something like that,’’ Sōjirō commented behind his newspaper.

’’I noticed when we were cleaning after… ’’ Gorō’s words fell.

_Shidō’s men came to thrash the place._

’’It’s not your fault,’’ Akira started automatically, but the other boy was far from convinced, running his hands on the board's sides assessing the damage.

He noted Morgana wasn’t with him, which had been the new norm by now.

’’Why aren’t you upstairs?’’ he asked.

’’Why aren’t _you_ upstairs?’’ Gorō countered with a question of his own.

’’I went to the store.’’

’’That’s not what you said when you left.’’

Damn, was the detective persistent,

or maybe he just knew how Akira felt and what had led Gorō downstairs was the same reason as him.

_An irrational but very real fear of being left alone._

’’…I’ll let everyone know that we’re here and come back,’’ Akira said.

’’Don’t leave me waiting for too long,’’ Gorō agreed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Major arcana are the 22 cards we are familiar from Persona series. Minor ones are divided to cups, swords, wands and coins and each of these have all numbers from 1 to 10, pages, knights, queens, kings and aces. They all have their own reading in fortune telling.
> 
> (- And yes, they are playing tycoon together for the game night.)
> 
> Akira having trust issues, who would have thought? Me. 
> 
> I interpreted this from what rejection must feel like, and from Akira's glasses.  
> Hear me out; he has his glasses off at the beginning of the game (When he gets sentenced). He also doesn’t wear them in the original ending of P5. (Well if you unlock the secret end scene in P5R he also takes them off, but in the original he had them off from the start of the ending.) A detail I would have hoped they would have kept, as I took it signify, in a meta-sense, freedom.  
> Akira doesn’t have to hide anymore behind his glasses and is ready to take on the world. Thus it would make sense that during the game, before he reaches freedom, he would still be working towards that.


	16. Sanctuary

When Akira came back Gorō had arranged the chess pieces ready. Boss had gone home complaining about how he was too old for this, whatever he was referring to.

Akira was squinting his eyes at the pieces in front of him like he couldn’t really tell them apart from one another.

’’Have you played chess before?’’ the detective asked.

’’No. Only shōgi.’’

’’You’ll pick up on this soon. The pawns move exactly the same way as in shōgi, as well as kings, rooks and bishops.’’ He demonstrated and separated them from the remaining pieces.

’’As for the other pieces…’’

Explaining was something Gorō shined at.

He had to explain a lot of simple things on TV while keeping people engaged. Make them laugh with him, not at him.

He had to explain lots of difficult subjects while making it sound easy to his coworkers and higher ups. Create an illusion that he was smarter than them as a protective shield.

It all manifested from when he had to explain all the gruesome details to social workers about his new homes. His life was on a line how well he could describe and provide evidence about his mistreatment. If he hadn’t explained well enough, he might have died long ago malnourished or from internal bleeding from domestic violence.

Akira nodded his head in understanding and they began to play.

Gorō was guaranteed a win just by experience, but still playing with his leader was enjoyable. Making unpredictable moves and trying to see what Akira was thinking, try to create a small crack to peer through the his mask. Playing so as to not let the other see what’s ahead of him.

His question from before was still left unanswered, but Gorō wasn’t in a mood to repeat himself. Also it would have made him sound…

Too prying?

Needy?

He couldn’t really pin it down, but whatever it was he didn’t want Akira to see him in a more negative light, which was illogical. He had already done the inconceivable. Betrayed, murdered, **killed Joker in cold blood** , but here he still was. If a repeated question was all it took for Akira to lower his opinion on him, then he would have been left dead inside Shidō’s Palace.

Paranoid. That’s what he was. 

’’Checkmate.’’ Gorō announced.

Akira kept his eyes on the board as if mystified by the result he should have seen coming. A short silence was broken with a burst of laughter that could be heard from upstairs.

’’Thank you for teaching me the rules. Let’s play another match later. We should probably join the others.’’ Akira offered his hand in a friendly handshake.

Gorō took it, swallowing his selfish wish to spend a little more time alone with the other.

\---

Today was the last day before the election. The day before their deadline.

Gorō was honestly amazed how short the waiting period had been in hindsight. The time spent playing chess and the others stopping by after school as a group or one by one. Gorō had spent those moments reading downstairs with Morgana in his lap so as not to disturb, but he was more often than not coerced along. 

They would play different retro games with Sakura. Kitagawa asked him for artistic inspiration or criticism on his pieces. Sakamoto would lend him shōnen manga. Takamaki would take note of his cosmetic corner that had taken over Akira's work desk, and asked for tips for her skin care routine or in her acting. Okumura would bring vegetables she grew herself for taste testing. Niijima would make sure both of them hadn’t been left too far behind in their studies, as they couldn’t attend school.

It was like Gorō was a part of Akira’s and their friends' life. Like a puzzle piece that fit despite all odds, even when he had shown his true self. It shouldn’t be possible and more than that he was afraid.

He hated that he was afraid that this all had to end.

Hated himself for getting used to it.

For becoming so codependent.

Lulled by the warmth of a place to belong, only to become stuck in it. Unable to go back to searching. Like a bug caught in a Venus flytrap.

He needed to fly.

He needed to fly away.

_If he didn’t he would never face himself._

Just like he had gathered the courage to betray and kill Joker, he had to keep a promise and thrust himself to the unknown. Leave everything to Sae-san. Leave it to the corrupted justice system that betrayed him over and over again, which he had ultimately become part of. 

Leave the Phantom thieves.

Leave Morgana.

Leave Akira alone.

It was too hard to let it all go, which is why Gorō made a request.

’’Akira, would you go with me to the Jazz Jin?’’

A request was made purely out of his self-satisfaction, to make it just a little easier for him. In some sick way live a moment in an illusion of happiness.

It had been easier back then to ask through a message, a code of text. Akira was the kind of guy who would answer right away with a yes, or the following day with an apology.

He had yet to be rejected.

Gorō had never felt as fragile of an existence.

Morgana was rubbing his legs with its head, and he couldn’t bring himself to look at Akira. If he would see that smiling face, he might doubt himself even more.

Akira squished his shoulder. A reassurance of a job well done.

_They weren’t even in Metaverse fighting for their life so why-?_

’’Of course,’’ Akira answered in a calm tone, like it was natural from him to say that.

Gorō let out a breath he hadn’t known he had held.

\---

At the jazz club Gorō felt calm. Thoughts of tomorrow and constant fear of getting attacked left outside the door. He had been to many different cafes, clubs, all for show. To keep the cultured superficial mask of a detective prince. Not a boy born to poverty and loneliness.

This was the only place he could say confidently that he was a regular. It was a sanctuary for him.

A place where if he had been gone for too long, the staff would ask where he had been.

 _’’Taking lives,’’_ he could never answer.

A place filled with soft lights, yet dimly lit corners. A place with music filled with powerful words hidden underneath the soft melody.

Gorō would order one drink and just sit there in silence, listening, sometimes even daring to close his eyes.

To live a sweet lie of nothing was or is wrong.

When he had first asked Akira to join him he had surprised himself. Sharing something so special to him. Something that grounded him to this reality besides his own flesh. Something he wouldn’t want to be gone.

And once Gorō had gone with him, he started to feel absence.

Even the place that had given this unfortunate a liar a piece of mind, was taken away from him.

How he loathed the feeling, that he became aware of just how alone he was.

A lone teen spending night at a local club.

No friends.

No tasks he had to do there.

Just solace from reality.

**It was all in vain.**

**Pathetic.**

**What a pitiful being he was.**

No matter how many nights he spent here after that, it didn’t feel the same without Akira by his side.

And he despised Akira for that, and even more himself.

Yet he had given in before the betrayal and asked him to join him there before stealing Sae-san’s treasure.

After tasting something like a forbidden fruit he just yearned for more, which was bad because he didn’t have an excuse back then.

No more duels nor playing up to their rivalry. 

He had already said everything he wanted, trusted him with his glove.

Admit that he hated Akira.

Even after all this it should have been shameful to ask and yet he had.

Akira had accepted that time too.

How he lived a short lie then and now again in this world with Akira and nothing was wrong. Away from a chilling night, away from the concept of Metaverse, away from Gorō’s past or sins.

A beautiful sound of piano playing in the background, and they sat side by side, comfortable.

No words that Gorō had to spill yet he would, like a spell Akira had placed on him.

Insignificant thoughts;

how the first thing he thought after hearing a love confession from a girl was how to reject it,

how his mother had always left him at the bathhouse when she had a client,

how Akira was the only one he refused to lose to.

And now.

’’Thank you for coming with me. Honestly it doesn’t feel the same without you anymore.’’

_Too much._

_He said too much._

Akira laughed lightheartedly.

’’I’m glad. You should take me on a date more often then,’’ he offered and raised his glass waiting for Gorō to join him in a cheers.

A promise he would undoubtedly break when this time he would be gone.

\---

Today was the day. Shidō won the election and was now officially Japan’s prime minister. Everyone had gathered to Leblanc to see the press conference and, against all Gorō's worries, Shidō confessed everything. The line was cut by the TV production, but he had confessed everything needed to question his character.

Sae-san gave Akira the permission to return to school for the time being and later his presumed death would be cleared out.

’’As for Akechi, he will be taken to protective custody,’’ she announced.

’’For real!?’’ Sakamoto was shocked.

’’Why? Will people come after his life?’’ Takamaki asked.

’’I wonder,’’ Gorō mused. He was somewhat interested to see just how well the protective measures would work in action.

’’It’s for the best. When Akechi is to testify in court against Shidō, there will be many other cases that will be reopened. We should proceed with at most caution,’’ Sae-san explained.

’’You’ll be moving out?’’ Boss asked and Gorō nodded with a small bow.

’’Yes. I thank you for everything Sakura Sōjirō-san.’’

’’I haven’t done anything noteworthy. You were nearly more helpful than this kid- Hm? Hey Akira, you’re not looking too good there,’’ Boss noted.

Gorō hadn’t seen Akira really even irritated before, now he looked like he was capable of unspeakable violence.

Joker hid everything well and when he had admitted he had thought of killing Shidō, Gorō had been too deep inside his own mind at the time to notice. They were both more than capable of hiding their emotions, but now Akira didn't seem to be able to do so.

’’It’s nothing. You didn’t intent to tell me about it?’’ he accused.

Honestly Gorō didn’t like this one bit. It made him uneasy.

’’I was, after Shidō's change of heart, and it just happened.’’

’’Alright. When will Gorō move out?’’ Akira bland out ignored him and questioned Sae-san.

She wasn’t used to hearing Akechi called by his first name and faltered for a minute.

’’When we'll publicly accuse Shidō, so not right away.’’

’’Good.’’ Akira seemed relieved and Gorō wondered just how socially dependent his leader must be.

_Such hypocrisy coming from him._

’’Yeah enough o’ that, we should celebrate, yeah? Let’s buy food! Tons!’’ Sakamoto tried to lighten the mood.

’’Drinks too!’’ Sakura joined.

\---

It was the first time for Gorō ito be able to attend the Phantom thieves victory celebration as it was for Boss and Sae-san. He couldn't remember when was the last time he had attended a party that wasn't just for appearances sake. It had its own charm to it but he just ended up listening quietly at the sides. A force of habit, a leftover of never feeling he belonged anywhere. Still it provided him some kind of peace just being here.

Once the night came and no one wanted to miss the last train, they went their own ways. Sae-san and Niijima offered to take Okumura home, while Kitagawa, Takamaki and Sakamoto walked. The Sakura family retreated from the cafe and it was just Akira, him and the cat.

’’Sulking doesn’t fit you,’’ Gorō was getting tired of the tense atmosphere.

’’I saw that both Futaba and Haru already knew,’’ Akira said in a harsh tone. 

’’So you’re jealous now?’’ he countered.

Akira looked at him with those grey eyes that Gorō had a hard time decoding. What he held wasn't a face of pure anger, but more bitter than anything mixed with deep concern.

’’You’re really planning to testify?’’

There was something final in that question.

’’Yes.’’

’’Then you’ll…’’ Akira’s voice faded to just a whisper, but Gorō got the idea.

’’Also admit all that I have done.’’

Akira was resting his head in his arms.

Grieving.

He knew- Had to know, that if his own sentence from just a violent outburst lead to a nearly year long prohibition period, murder would lead to something much worse.

**Death.**

’’Will you help me move out?’’ Gorō requested.

He didn’t know would this be the last time he could ask for something. As it was last days of his freedom before eternal confinement. 

’’When?’’ Akira quietly spoke.

’’Tomorrow.’’

Smile had returned to Akira’s lips.

_It_ _fitted him better._

’’Yes. I’ll help you. Always.’’

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I kept listening to Persona 5 Royal OST: Throw your mask away, while I was writing this. I might have cried a bit.
> 
> So does anyone else note, how Akechi literally asks a few days before fulfilling his plan to kill Akira, for them to go to Jazz club together?  
> ''I’ll just have the last supper with my rival here. Nope. Social link is maxed. I have thrown a glove to your face, but I really just wanted to invite you with me.''  
> …Suspicious, I say.


	17. Empty

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Updated this day early, because I'm traveling to my sick mother. (Not THE virus, don't worry.) I will continue to update this fic daily.

When Gorō had told him he would testify, Akira had never felt as heartbroken as he felt now.

He couldn’t be selfish and ask him not, when he had told him so earnestly. It was something that he had decided for himself and if Akechi had told Futaba and Haru about this, then it must be his way atone.

But reality was way harsher. Gorō would sacrifice himself, just like he had tried to before, but this time Akira felt powerless to stop him. Because he wasn’t the one to determine his fate. It was the law. Something that had been used and bend by the compromised police and attorneys by Shidō’s and his followers' will. It couldn’t be trusted.

And more importantly, it wasn’t fair to Gorō. Even if he somehow had convinced himself that he did have a choice, it was between different paths to doom when he had first pulled the trigger.

Maybe Akira was just projecting all this on to him. Akira didn’t know everything. Not every twist and turn in the his life story, but the past couldn’t be changed. The future could.

The detective redeeming himself with death wasn’t right. It wasn’t even a heroic sacrifice, just a suicide.

Akira didn’t want any of this to happen.

He tried to hide all this best he could as he left for school. None of what had happened today sticking to his head.

_’I’ll wait for you at Kichijōji at our usual place. Let’s meet there,’_ Gorō had sent him a message and Akira's chest felt tight.

The detective had only had a handful of things, he didn’t need help carrying them. It all made sense, but every second with him felt precious at this moment, not that it hadn’t had before, just that he was more aware of it than ever.

Morgana’s tail swung in distress sensing Akira’s mood.

’’I think, I should give you two some alone time.’’

’’You don’t have to Mona,’’ he reassured.

’’Why? I think it’s only fitting. Remember how I left you alone, when you two were together?’’ Morgana reminded him.

’’Yeah. Why did you that?’’ Akira wondered and the cat jumped on his shoulder.

’’Akechi was an enemy of the Phantom thieves, so if you had gotten too attached, it would have fallen to my shoulders to snap you out of it.’’ Mona puffed his chest up with pride.

’’So you felt like a third wheel?’’ he teased.

’’I always do! No one other than the Phantom thieves can understand me!’’

Akira hummed in acknowledgement and Morgana leapt to the ground in a fluid motion.

’’I’ll go see what Lady Ann is up to. She and Ryūji were planning on going to the gym.’’

’’You go do that,’’ he agreed.

Then Morgana was gone and Akira alone for the train ride.

\---

Gorō was waiting by the Penguin Sniper in his usual outfit.

_No more hoodie Akechi,_ Akira was just a little sad at the thought.

’’Hello Gorō,’’ he greeted and the other lifted his gaze from the phone.

’’Hello, I don’t see Morgana with you,’’ the detective noticed.

’’He said he wanted to give us space by old times sake,’’ he explained.

Gorō nob to himself.

’’I’ll show you to my apartment.’’

His apartment was situated in a flat full of single studios. It was about what Akira had expected when the other had told him that he didn’t live in the student dorm.

When he and Gorō stepped inside the apartment it was a mess.

Just like with Sōjirō, the whole place had been turned upside down, but unlike then Akira didn’t know what to expect. The detective didn’t seem even a little disturbed how someone had gone through his belongings.

’’Can you help me clean this?’’

’’Sure,’’ he agreed.

It was the first time he had seen Akechi’s flat, but he could sense that the other didn’t spend much time here.

A single room, that could be purposed as a bedroom, kitchen and living room. Only bathroom was situated behind a door. The room was actually western style, thus didn’t include a futon, but a bed. Bathroom cabinets were full of medicine, nearly like Gorō's own personal hospital. Neat clothes had been spread all over, pockets turned inside out.

’’Shame they found it,’’ Gorō spoke absentmindedly.

When Akira turned to look the other was examining a loose floorboard. He peered over the detective's shoulder to see a now empty box.

’’What was in it?’’

’’A model gun. Not the real thing but it serves as good bait.’’

Akira didn’t like the fact that Gorō had prepared for them to storm his own apartment. Not because how he had been smart and predicted it, but that the other couldn’t even imagine being safe in his own home.

_Then again, when had he felt safe in his home?_

Akira really didn’t want to leave him in isolation or feeling unsafe ever again.

\---

Picking Gorō's stuff felt oddly intimate and yet he didn’t seem to mind. Akira got the feeling none of the material things mattered to him, despite how he dressed. There was nothing hung on the walls, no collectibles, nothing that wasn’t absolutely necessary.

When Akira asked him if anything had been stolen he just noted that nothing important. Must have meant by the looks of it more weapons.

Otherwise the apartment felt empty.

Cold and claustrophobic.

Like it’s walls were closing in on Akira and he felt it hard to breathe.

No wonder the detective spent his time outside anywhere else until the late hours.

When they were ready Gorō offered for them to rest until Sae came to fetch him to the safe house.

’’I’m sorry. I only have instant coffee and water,’’ he apologized.

’’No worries, water is fine,’’ Akira reassured.

When Akira saw the content of the fridge was filled with just water bottles. He shouldn’t have been surprised but he was, and really worried.

’’I’m happy you don’t have to live here at least. This place sucks,’’ he just had to get it out of his system.

Gorō tried to hold back a laugh.

’’Sorry, would you rather we wait elsewhere? There is this bakery nearby-’’ he began but Akira bluntly refused.

’’No need. This place is still a part of you in a sense.’’

He had predicted that Gorō would call him a fool for saying that, but the other stayed silent with a small smile on his lips.

’’Will you come to the court when I testify?’’ he asked.

’’Of course,’’ Akira didn’t hesitate, but then he thought Gorō in front of the court admitting his crimes.

The flashing lights of the cameras, next headlines of news, the following chaos. Him there, alone, with that fake smile on his lips, playing a perfect villain for the audience who couldn’t tell the difference.

The difference between a liar and an actor.

Akira felt his stomach turning inside out. 

’’You don’t have to give yourself in.’’

’’How do you suppose I got these clues then? I was in the same place as the ’’real’’ murderer every time. Sounds suspicious and too convenient,’’ Gorō was logical in his approach and Akira’s responses were limited.

’’Sae can work it out.’’

’’You really don’t want that I turn myself in, do you?’’ The other wasn’t convinced.

’’Of course! You’re important to me!’’ Akira shouted and Gorō's face didn’t betray any emotion. 

’’You shouldn’t do this. It doesn’t help anyone. You can’t make up anything by life in prison, or at worst death.’’ There Akira finally said it, and felt horrible.

**Death.**

’’Akira…’’ Gorō said.

Was it a plea to stop or to express something else?

Akira didn’t know.

’’You’re such a hypocrite to say I should take care of myself while you won’t. It should work both ways, so don’t do it. Find another way. Anything else I- I can’t lose you…’’ he continued, but found himself unable to continue without bursting to tears. His emotions were too raw to put into words.

Gorō kept looking down like he wanted to say something but didn’t. The well crafted mask not letting any emotion show.

But even if he was strong, he **must** feel something under all that.

Even if he had let out all of his rage, he wasn’t empty.

Not like this apartment.

Gorō was a deeply private person, who didn’t trust others. He talked to other people on his own terms, with a fitting facade of a pleasant detective and let out all his rage out while wearing a black mask.

But Akira had seen glimpses of Gorō without these masks. Covered in dark, morbid and dry sense humor. He got everything, even the most hardest of tasks, done without hesitating.

**But he should hesitate.** This was his life.

And even if this was development and Gorō was placing others needs before his own, it didn’t need to be like this.

\---

It was like a slap in the face when Akira got home and Gorō was on TV. A well rehearsed script memorized about his lies, about Shidō, about what will happen now. 

The wording was that ’’Akechi had helped Shidō’’ and not ’’killed for him’’ which was a relief. He could still go back, be persuaded by Akira.

The TV host was shocked, but tried to keep her cool and ask the right questions. When she didn’t know what to ask, Gorō was happy to assist and direct the conversation how he pleased. He threw names of events that sounded like threats to those who dared to interfere with the court or to defend Shidō.

Akira was winded by the time the show ended. He texted Gorō to ask if he was okay and informed him that he could call Akira if he needed it.

The group chat went wild in that short while.

_’No way? Did Akechi just admit everything? Is that allowed?’_ Ryūji questioned.

_’Yeah, he talked about Metaverse. Not directly, but he made it sound like a threat,’_ Ann noticed.

_’I wouldn’t have been able to say all that live on TV, but he seemed totally fine!’_ Futaba was impressed.

_’I wonder what’s going to happen now?’_ Yūsuke was thinking ahead.

_’This seems to be a tactic to pressure the higher ups to get their act together. The announcement for Shidō’s prosecution should be published soon,’_ Makoto informed them.

_’The web's response is really odd. They're just all question marks or not responsive at all,’_ Futaba typed.

_’What could that be about?’_ Haru wondered.

_’We just have to trust Sae and Akechi, and that they will handle everything,’_ Makoto typed.

Akira couldn’t bring himself to answer and Morgana climbed on his back.

’’How did it go with Akechi?’’

’’I don’t know… I hope I got through to him,’’ he wished.

\---

By Akira’s standards distracting himself from all the unpleasant feelings should have been easy now that he was in school again, yet he couldn’t concentrate. His mind wandered again and again to Gorō, and the public response, or the lack of it.

Akechi’s blog was filled with questions, theories about how it had been a weird joke, some completely ignored it and some claimed the whole TV-show had been staged.

When finals came for the semester, Akira worked on auto-pilot, and then Gorō sent him a simple message that made his sense of time stop for a minute.

_’I’ll come to Shūjin today. Meet me by the entrance. I want to test something.’_

True to his word the detective waited by the school gates wearing no disguise whatsoever. For how careful he had been about and worried constantly about their safety before Shidō's confirmed change of heart, Gorō didn’t seem to care about his own life at all.

’’Akira,’’ he called like there wasn’t anything unusual about his presence here. 

People passing by were staring, some were whispering among themselves.

_Gorō had a death wish._

Akira leaned close to try to hide him from other people's view.

’’Aren’t you in protective custody? Why are you here?’’ He tried to direct them somewhere else, but Gorō just brushed his hand off him.

’’I’ll show you,’’ he casually leaned back and walked to the school, Akira followed on edge.

’’Isn’t that Akechi?’’

’’You mean the second ace detective?’’

’’Oh, I want his signature!’’

Everyone was reacting like online. No flooded hate comments, no faces of disgust.

Still Akira felt like it was only a matter of time before the bomb would blow up and situation would get out of hand.

’’Excuse me,’’ A small girl came to speak to Gorō stopping them.

Akira wanted them to just go and do whatever the detective was about to show him, but the other didn’t have any intention of doing so.

’’Yes? How can I help you?’’

’’Can I get your signature?’’ an innocent question without any malicious intent.

’’You want one? Are you sure you want one from a liar?’’ Gorō said and Akira swore he would carry the other out of here himself if everything were to go wrong now.

’’O-oh? I thought it was just a prank,’’ the girl struggled.

’’It isn’t.’’

’’R-Really?’’

’’Yes.’’

The girl seemed bothered, but not really registering what was being said, and Gorō gestured for Akira to follow.

’’Sae-san is coming to Leblanc. We should gather everyone.’’

\---

’’We have to steal the public’s heart,’’ Morgana had deducted.

Shidō’s Palace wasn’t going to be the last Palace they would conquer.

The public wasn’t reacting to Shidō’s nor Gorō’s confessions. They were both treated the same as before and Shidō was to be made the next prime minister despite the initial scandal. The reaction was clearly not natural and they had to venture the most deep bits of Mementos to find out why.

This was also the final request from Sae Niijima.

Akira had a hard time putting his role as Joker on, when he knew what would happen if they succeeded.

He had himself been the target of the prejudice when he had been falsely accused. Life wouldn’t be easy. People would make up rumors, only few schools and jobs would allow someone with a criminal record to attend them.

Gorō would never feel accepted by others like he had graved it. Reputation gone, starting everything over.

Akira made a promise in his heart, after this he would be there for him, and would talk to Sae. Make her promise that Gorō wouldn’t die, or spend his whole life in prison.

He would have to.

The Phantom thieves felt tense as the they scaled the rails leading deeper and deeper down. The trains going the same way were boarded with people’s Shadows. Something was definitely down there and they would have to face it.

Akira collected himself and let out a deep breath.

Now he was Joker, and there was no time for feeling weak.

\---

The last stop for the trains led to a door that was bombarded with people waiting to get in.

They sneaked their way inside only to come to the gruesome realization it was a prison and now they were stuck, and had no way that they could go back.

People were locking themselves in, willingly.

A distorted reality where everyone was behind bars that they had, apparently, created for themselves. Or so Shidō, Kamoshida, Madarame and Kaneshiro said.

It was really uncanny, how everyone was satisfied inside their prison cells.

Whether they passed by their caged they were tempted to join them, to be free of any responsibility.

To not need to think anymore.

It sounded like brainwashing. Yet they all had motivations to think so. A single parent wanting a release for the responsibility, or a student not knowing which path in life to take and would rather have someone choose for them.

Red pipes like veins surrounded the individual cages of slothful people downwards. The lower they went, the stronger the Shadows got. The Shadows had a form of prison guards.

A resemblance to the Velvet room that Akira had a hard time ignoring. 

\---

When they arrived on the deepest floor there stood one giant cup that the people in the cells kept calling ’’the holy grail’’. People’s cognition's lone treasure had somehow gained self awareness.

They tried to destroy it, but-

’’It's no good! It healed itself again!’’ Oracle shouted.

The people in their cells were yelling in protest, groaning like zombies in agony. It was disturbing.

’’Couldn’t we shut them up?’’ Skull asked.

’’There are too many. All the people from Shibuya. No maybe the whole Kanto area!’’ Mona told everyone.

’’What are we supposed to do then?’’ Noir asked.

’’Let’s cut those veins leading to the inside of the cup. It must be devouring whatever the people are giving it,’’ Crow pointed out, but then the grail released a violent sonic boom throwing them into the real world.

They were outside the Shibuya station in their regular clothes.

’’What?’’ Ryūji stumbled up.

’’Did we just-?’’ Ann looked at the people around them.

’’We're back in the real world,’’ Makoto confirmed.

’’Did we lose?’’ Haru asked.

’’No, we have to try again,’’ Akira encouraged yet everyone seemed reluctant.

’’We should. Moping isn’t going to help anybody or was your hero charade just for show?’’ Gorō joined, provokingly.

Futaba stomped her feet in frustration.

’’Yeah! Let’s not give into some weird possessed grail-’’ she stopped, when the first rain drops started to hit the ground.

The water was the color of blood.

No one else around them seemed to notice anything unusual about the rain. None even seemed to notice it was raining nor looked for cover nor opened umbrellas.

An earthquake came and what looked like meat and bones started to grow from the building and the ground. Morgana explained that the Mementos was fusing with reality.

Then the pain came.

It was different from any sensation of pain Akira had felt. It was nausea so strong that it brought a cold sweat forward and left you exhausted to the very bone. Even standing became hard and Akira found himself falling down. When he looked around him, he saw how others had also fallen, the same excruciating feeling clear on their face.

Something was very wrong.

A voice from the heavens, that called itself the masses treasure, belittled their efforts because they were about to be erased from people’s cognition. The very same people they had tried to help.

Then the Phantom thieves, his friends, were disappearing. One by one. Screaming. Scared.

Akira was too shocked to even move and powerless to stop it. Not able to reach out to anyone.

Morgana apologized for their failed mission and was gone like a mirage.

Gorō locked eyes with him and recognizing his agony and offered a hand towards him.

’’We’ll show that grail, Akira... Bust it to tiny pieces and scrap metal.’’

He sounded confident despite their state.

Akira wanted to believe those words and reached out to grasp it.

Gorō's hand faded with the touch and then he was gone.

What Akira had feared the most became true.

_He was all alone._

\---

Akira woke up at the Velvet room eyes filled with tears streaming down his face and hyperventilating. Mouth left open in a voiceless scream, but he didn’t know when he had started to scream.

He tried to calm his racing heart to convince himself it was all a bad dream.

Then he was ordered executed.

He couldn’t remember.

He just kept demanding to know where his friends, his teammates were.

None of this made sense; it wasn’t supposed to be like this!

Then there was a flash of light.

He felt intense pain and his vision began to blur.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Gotta love giving our Protagonist-kun some much needed ability to express emotions. The line ’’important to me’’, is as good as a confession, so yeah. Enjoy that.
> 
> No more of the inherent homo-romanticism of sharing each others clothes with Akira and Akechi.  
> RIP.


	18. Death

Gorō woke up inside an old fashioned looking jail cell and his first thought was that he needed to get out.

The jail's bars disappeared and still dazed he walked outside. Fractured memories coming together slowly, of how they had tried to fight the masses' treasure, or how they had been rejected and were about to seize to exist.

Everything around him was blue, so much so it should have hurt his eyes, but it didn’t. Hallway was filled with countless jail cells without any locks on the bars or means other means of escape. Gorō noticed that his clothes remained the same as they were inside the Metaverse.

’’The Velvet room,’’ he muttered in recognition.

It must be what Akira had been talking about. The color fit and the prison cells gave Gorō a nostalgic feeling, which wasn’t possible. He shouldn’t have been here before.

_Akira._

A small surge of relief washed over him. If he was here, then surely Akira and the others were too.

 _Why_ they were here was the more pressing question right now.

Cold breeze carried a quiet voice of a pleading child.

’’Please… Help…’’

A blinking light manifested itself and transformed into a butterfly. The creature flew by Crow slowly like trying to lure him somewhere.

Suspicious Gorō glanced around but the place seemed like a maze with no apparent way out, so he decided to follow the thing saber around his waist ready.

\---

Endless rows of empty cells, no other people’s shadows trapped inside them.

This definitely wasn’t Mementos. The air was far too different.

The butterfly guide before Gorō faded and that’s when he heard yelling.

_’’Where are my friends?! Are they safe?!’’_

There was no mistaking that voice, it was Akira.

He was distraught, voice cracking in a way he hadn’t known possible.

Gorō sprinted towards the sound, trying to prepare what was to come.

Loud bangs and explosions echoed in the empty halls.

His survival mode turned on and his mind became clear, moves calculated.

It had never happened when anyone besides himself was in danger.

He had never had someone he could and wanted to protect. But he didn’t want to- he _wouldn’t_ lose Akira.

Too attached to care how soft he had grown.

\---

Crow arrived at the center of the room where there stood a pair of tall guillotines. Joker laid on the ground defeated, and a pair of small children with a long nosed old man were standing at the opposite end of the room. The attendants and the master of the Velvet room, Akechi interpreted.

He cast a Megidolaon and the other side was taken by complete surprise. Thick mist offered him cover as Gorō followed with another another spell, his only revival spell on Akira. It seemed to work and Joker slowly tried to get up, but failed. Akechi rushed to his side.

’’Akira, can you hear me? Can you stand?’’ he knelt down beside his leader and offered his shoulder.

’’G-Gorō,’’ Joker swallowed hard, holding his side.

’’You’re still hurt.’’ Crow hadn’t hated the fact that he couldn’t use healing spells more than now.

’’I-I thought you-’’ Tears threatened to spill from Joker's eyes that were already red from crying.

_He hated seeing Akira like this._

’’I’m fine, so everyone else is too,’’ Crow offered.

Joker scrubbed his eyes dry, chuckling weakly.

’’You’re right, as always.’’

Gorō dared to smile at that.

’’Caroline, do we know this inmate?’’ one of the twins, the more energetic spoke.

’’Justine, we don’t. Yet it feels like we should,’’ the other, more quiet one answered.

’’What are you hesitating? I ordered you to execute the failed Trickster. If his teammate gets in your way then he too shall face the same fate,’’ the older man ordered.

’’Yes, master,’’ the small twins said in unison.

Frankly Gorō wasn’t too keen on the idea of fighting children, but if they had done this to Akira, then he wouldn’t treat them as such. He would take a dark path and if needed, **kill again.**

He would protect Joker and pay back from saving him.

Be acknowledged by him.

~~_Be loved by him._ ~~

Crow rose to his feet, blade readied, but Joker wrapped his arms around him holding him in place. It was a desperately tight embrace.

’’Don’t… I- I don’t want you to die.’’

It was something Akira had referenced before, but now it laid in front of them.

That Gorō should live.

’’I won’t die,’’ he promised, honest for once in his life.

Begrudgingly slowly Joker released him and Crow stood up in front of the other protectively.

If Gorō were to die here, he couldn't die later the way he was meant to die. Executed from all the wrong he had done.

Yet dying later would also be a problem if it would lead Akira to the this state. Crumbling down like this, nothing like the confident charismatic leader he had grown to know.

He didn’t want to see Akira in distress like this ever again.

Gorō's determination was wavering.

_But wasn’t he just running away from his sense of responsibility again?_

_His new sense of justice?_

_Why the hell was he backing away from death now?_

_He didn’t- hadn’t felt fear for his life in a long time._

_So why now?_

Gorō felt a sense of a dizzy spell over him.

_’’Have you regained your taste for the fear of death?’’_ an animalistic voice spoke.

His head hurt so much that he wouldn’t be surprised if it would burst.

Bearing his finger nails deep into his skull was the only pain that let him still remain conscious.

_’’I’m a guardian of your grave. Gatekeeper of the gates you must pass to venture to the other side.’’_

Gorō laughed at the irony.

His own death wanted to aid him.

_’’You already know my name. Because I am thou. Thou art I.’’_

The mask in his face felt like it was stuck in place.

Gorō ripped the mask out of his face shouting.

**’’Come to me! My hell hound!’’**

A black dog the size of a horse appeared. Eyes gleaming red, stench of corpses all over it.

’’Show them blazing hell,’’ Crow ordered.

From the skulls, that the dog carried, small flames like will ’o wisps joined together and set the opposite side of the room on fire.

The other of the twin brought out a cold spell and disbanded the flames with it.

’’What power. Justine, it’s the power of a wild card!’’

The realization seemed to make the twins lose the will to fight, and they turned towards each other.

’’But Caroline, we have known only about one prisoner meant for rehabilitation.’’

The butterfly that had faded from existence before Crow flew over the twins. Like with a pop of a balloon it burst and scattered to a shower of sparkling flakes that fell upon the twins. They fell as in pain, but rose up in unison.

’’Who are you?’’ Gorō demanded. He didn’t sense any more hostility from them, but the man behind them had yet to make a move.

The twins started to speak in turns.

’’We are-’’

’’We were-’’

’’-originally one,’’

’’-but were torn about’’

’’-by malevolent intent.’’

’’You shall join as use one,’’ they finished together.

_He wasn’t a fan of this performance of a freak show._

’’We have to execute you?’’ Akira spoke and Gorō returned to his leader's side to helped him to stand up.

What the other had said only now registering in his head.

_He really hoped he had heard wrong._

’’We lose our current one’’

’’-then return to our original.’’ The twins confirmed.

\---

Gorō really didn’t want that the final corpse he would leave behind his trail, would be of a little girl who's head would be separated from her neck.

Despite all common sense he placed his trust in Akira; that fusion only looked like execution and that death gave a life to new form.

Crow and Joker were situated at the right and left levers of the guillotines.

’’On my three,’’ Akira said like he had done this before.

From what he had told Gorō, he had seen it enough times to be confident about it.

’’1’’

’’2’’

’’3!’’

They pulled their respective levers and the blades fell down.

No blood was spilled, instead thousands upon thousands of butterflies flew from what should have been lifeless bodies.

They swarmed and flurried into a new shape of a little girl. She retained a familiar form of the twins, but didn’t have an eye-patch and her hair remained free.

’’I thank you Kurusu Akira, Akechi Gorō. My name is Lavenza. I welcome you to the Velvet room,’’ she greeted. 

’’Who are you and why were you attacking Akira?’’ Gorō asked again.

’’I was split apart, soul torn in to those two twins. I was supposed to be your guide and you both were supposed to be my quests. Yet…’’ She turned towards the old man that had remained quiet the whole time.

’’The scoundrel who has swindled my master’s name denied my task. My sight has been restored, your lies shall no longer work.’’

’’So, that’s the true mastermind,’’ Gorō confirmed and called the hell hound to his side ready.

In turn Akira called Alice to his.

The long nosed man floated to the air with a dark aura.

’’The game isn’t over yet. Whether the world is rebuilt, left as it is or destroyed, it is all sport to me. I am the holy grail that grants wishes, or more accurate a god who responds to desire and holds dominion over man.

Humans should be met with ruin, you brought forth that answer.

Yet you didn’t bore me, inmate. Dodged the game before you and joined hands with your opponent, pursued him to your side. Even I could have not expected such a result,’’ he spoke to Joker.

’’Opponent?’’ Crow took note of the phrasing.

’’What an unexpected result it was,’’ the self proclaimed god mused.

’’What?’’ Joker asked.

’’He planned everything from the beginning. If Akechi were to win, the world would be destroyed and remade. If you, the Trickster, were to be successful, the world would be left as it is. But the game was rigged from the beginning,’’ Lavenza explained.

’’Yet my pawn decided to switch sides to your’s. What an unexpected result. Indeed a Trickster, who was capable of changing the rules of the game,’’ the old man laughed in a hollow tone.

_This had all been just a game?_

The revenge had been all that Gorō had and it had been used against him. It was all that he had, the only thing that could distract him for the fact that he had no control over his miserable life.

He had been thrust to unfavorable circumstances, only to get a saving grace at the end in form of his ability to navigate Metaverse. His ability to wield his own shadow and turn it into a Persona.

He thought it was the devil's or god's work, granted because he wished for power. He would know, as he had called to them both when he found his mother's lifeless body.

Now he knew better.

It was nothing but a game.

Just a power granted so the giver of such power could use him as their pawn.

**Hilarious.**

Not only had selfish adults manipulated Gorō during his short life, but a god.

As expected he had been used again, pitted against Akira so the god could watch from the side lines and laugh. Whomever would fall, the god wouldn't ultimately care. Everything had been according to some grant plan to remake the world.

Gorō didn’t want anyone, not even a God, pulling any of his strings anymore.

’’You peaked my interest. I offer you a deal. I’ll leave the world as it is and Phantom thieves will return, be praised and gain fame,’’ the grail offered to Akira.

Crow was alarmed that his leader would falter from the pressure to see his friends.

He squished the other’s shoulder for insurance,

or more as threat.

’’I refuse,’’ Joker’s answer came clear.

’’Very well, you have accepted death,’’ the god spoke, uncaring.

Akira and Gorō braced for an oncoming attack in unison, but the god of control vanished without a trace.

\----

A white light and broken chains brought back the body of the possessed man, now unconscious.

Lavenza called him master, and the man named Igor introduced himself and apologized for the impostor. Lavenza said everyone of the Phantom thieves was also here safe, just like Akechi had predicted, and Igor explained it was because this place was situated between dreams and reality, mind and matter. A better worded explanation than what Akira had given to Gorō.

’’I’ll go get everyone,’’ Joker stated.

He seemed to be feeling better, he had been shaken up mentally but had regained his composure now that he knew it as a fact that everyone were indeed fine.

Yet the detective was too concerned to leave him alone.

’’I’ll go too.’’ Gorō tried to move, but instead found himself stumbling forward. Feet betraying under him and his vision spinning.

Akira caught his fall without trouble.

’’You just awakened to a new Persona. You should rest. It takes a lot out of you,’’ he spoke softly lowering them to the floor.

’’I’m not some frail little princess.’’ Gorō flung the other's hands away to prove a point.

’’I know. You saved me again. Thank you.’’ Joker smiled brightly.

’’Don’t make it a habit.’’ He averted his eyes.

_Actually Gorō wouldn’t mind if he did._

’’I won’t, but you really should rest. I’ll call to you if I get in trouble.’’ Akira rose up dusting himself.

’’Expecting me to come running if you do?’’ he mused.

’’Trusting you to.’’

’’…Fine. Make it quick,’’ Gorō agreed.

’’Thanks honey.’’ Akira was off to a different part of the maze from where Crow had come from.

’’Let me replenish your energy.’’ Lavenza came to his aid.

Gorō didn’t protest, but kept an eye on her as she cast an unknown spell. Spell that brought to his mind pictures of sun filled fields of blue flowers and butterflies.

Of peace that could never be.

He hadn’t even noticed that he had closed his eyes, and snapped out of the trance he had nearly fallen to.

’’…What a restless mind. You have gained a great power without connections to anyone. Brought new masks to hide behind within yourself,’’ she spoke with metaphors.

’’And that’s not what I’m supposed to do? I have to do so with connections?’’ Gorō was reminded of Akira’s ramblings about Personas and confidants.

’’No… It’s just an unexpected result. Something that wouldn’t have happened, if we had been there to guide you. That was our original intent, and yet we have failed our task.’’ She looked ashamed.

He hated the implication of what ifs.

If he had met Akira years earlier.

If he had opened up to Sae-san.

_If his mother hadn’t died._

They were all just delusions of a life he hoped he could have gained. In the end clinging to his past had led him to this point. To search further for regrets and people to blame for his fate, was unnecessary. He was finally accepting that.

’’Like I would have listened to people from the dream world,’’ Gorō answered.

’’Perhaps, but you should have had the option the least. I apologize to you as our quest.’’

The apology came a little too late to have any meaning, but he saw no point in being mad at a child.

\---

Akira joined them soon with everyone. Crow stretched his arm and adjusted a gun by his side. He was feeling better.

’’Huh? Crow’s here already?’’ Sakamoto asked.

’’You weren’t in a cell?’’ Okumura wondered.

’’I was, but I broke out as soon as I woke up,’’ he recalled.

’’Badass,’’ Sakura noted, grinning.

Others seemed more concerned about their surroundings, which was understandable. Igor and Lavenza were the ones to explain the current situation to them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I drew the good dog hell hound, and you can find it in the links below.
> 
> [Twitter](https://twitter.com/RuosteRauta/status/1310919405107281926?s=20)   
>  [Tumbler](https://ruosterauta.tumblr.com/post/630606332825829376/)
> 
> Akechi’s new persona, a hell hound, belongs to the death arcana. Death in tarot represents grant change, death of the old and, well, death. It’s fitting in a metaphoric way because Akechi’s mind changes from wanting to die, to live.
> 
> How I came to the idea that Akechi would have a hell hound was when Morgana and Akechi were bounding. Then it hit me that Akechi is a dog person as he gets along with Koromaru in Persona Q2, so of course his new Persona would be a dog.
> 
> The reason why Akechi’s hell hound is the size of a horse is because in some folk lore the hell hound is a horse. So I fused them. A horse sized dog.


	19. Future

They would have to slay a god, if they wanted to bring the world back to its previous state.

It shouldn’t be a surprising escalation of stakes in this stage to Akira. They had already wielded power to influence people they wanted if they were able to fulfill a few criteria. Striking down people’s combined cognitive treasure should stil guarantee the real elimination of the Metaverse. No more people could abuse the power to travel within these realms anymore.

Morgana’s true identity was revealed by the Velvet room's attendants to be hope gathered from humans. Akira thought it was very telling that humanities hope was in a form of a cat.

Mona’s presence let the Phantom thieves return to the reality fused with Mementos without disappearing. Some people seemed to still acknowledge the state of the new world. Shivering in panic, pointing towards the bright red sky, or covering in fear.

The Phantom thieves started to climb their way to the holy grail, now located high above buildings roofs. When they reached the grail, Mona cut the veins that kept filling the grail with liquid. Crow hit it with fire, Joker with lighting and Fox with ice and the giant grail crumbled.

It opened into a circle creating a halo for enormous being.

The being called itself Yaldabaoth. It was the size of a building and just staring at the thing for too long gave them vertigo. Little like staring at the stars at the planetarium, but when they were shown in comparison to their own planet.

It sprung metallic wings that were there for its own bestowed god status, but didn’t serve any other purpose. It didn’t need them to fly it. It defined gravity by floating as it was already, Joker thought humorless.

They faltered for only a moment, before they reorganized and began the dance of a battle again. 

This time the thing used, what it called 7 deadly sins, against them.

It cast the sin of lust on Morgana, who would heal the structure and Joker ordered Mona to fall back who was replaced with Panther.

The grail followed up with a wave of gluttony through them making every action feel twice as difficult. Vanity on Fox, Envy on Crow, Greed on Panther, Pride on Joker. Twisting their own selves to weapons against them. They weren’t above the masses' influence, nor their own negative emotions. But that didn’t mean they couldn’t snap out of it. They did every time, but it slowed their progress.

Then the grail shot out an energy gathered from all it's deadly sins to finish them. Once and then thrice after for the good measure. And they couldn’t get up, even when they desperately tried.

\---

’’Shitshitshit…’’ Gorō mumbled gritting his teeth together, scratching the ground for support.

’’My strength…’’ Yūsuke was panting.

’’I can’t get up,’’ even Futaba spoke.

_She wasn’t in the front line, yet she had been hit._

’’Is this it..?’’ Haru asked further back and Akira came to the understanding that none of them had been spared.

Yaldabaoth was talking about natural order and how they couldn’t fight against it.

Joker didn’t want to lend the thing any satisfaction of listening its ramblings, but he could hardly keep his eyesight from dimming to black as it was. He had to try to focus on something.

’’Humans are naught but clumps of desire. Logic dictates that a world filled with them will decline. Men filled with deadly sins shall be punished.’’

’’Human hope is a desire too and not a sin! You shouldn’t underestimate it!’’ Morgana rose up to his small feet.

’’Attendant created by fragments of human hope. What could you possibly do?’’ Yaldabaoth taunted.

’’You’ll see… We will take the world!’’ Morgana swore.

A distant shouting could be heard. Those few who trusted them. Sae, Sakura, Mishima, Tōga and more… Akira could hear them all calling for them. They trusted him, even when he couldn’t even stand on his own feet.

Like Gorō had when they were fading away.

Akira rose to his feet.

He couldn’t let them down.

An applause could be heard from people of Shibuya as they stood against something some couldn’t even comprehend.

Joker released the chains of his Persona. It transformed to something even more humongous than the god in front of them.

He gathered his strength and unlike before, when he would have seek approval by others in his team by looking behind him, he didn’t.

The Trickster trusted that they all were still there, and that they all wanted the same thing.

They wouldn’t abandon him.

**He wasn’t alone**.

Akira fired a bullet from his gun with the same tempo as his new Persona, it hit the target and God was defeated.

\---

The Metaverse was gone and so was Morgana. Everyone felt the absence of him and the effects of a bittersweet farewell. They scattered and Akira and Gorō were left alone feeling the heaviest sense of loss. Akira had spent nearly a year with Mona and to now go on without him left him feeling drained. 

The cat had been his stop button and common sense when he lacked it. He would have to break the news to Sōjirō also. Boss had cared for the cat as much as them.

Sae joined the duo soon, as she had been waiting near Shibuya.

’’You managed to success I presume.’’

Her presence meant judgement.

How Akira would lose another loved one without a power to stop it.

Maybe he could break Gorō out of prison once he was sentenced, hide him and they could live as they did before. Sōjirō had been cooperative to hide Akira after all and he wouldn’t mind another boy on the run.

But it wouldn’t be fair to the detective, who would refuse to become someone to hide and protect. To force him in to anything Akira would be no better than those who had manipulated the other to do as desired as they saw Gorō only as a puppet.

’’Yes, we did,’’ the detective answered. ’’Sae-san, I would like to make a request.’’

’’What is it?’’

’’Be my defense attorney and win.’’ Gorō’s words made Akira doubt his own hearing.

’’I don’t plan on dying.

In some countries the life sentence is 20 years which can be cut down to 15 years with good behavior, and some don’t give full sentences to those underage. The youngest age to be considered an adult is 18. I don’t think Metaverse is or was under any country’s jurisdiction. We can use it to our advantage if you decide to defend me,’’ he continued and Akira was sure he wasn’t just hearing things. Even his knowledge stats weren't high enough to come up with something like that.

’’My first job as a defense attorney and it would be a case of serial killings… I like the challenge.’’ Sae smiled. ’’To be truthful, I didn’t feel good letting you testify Akechi. Capital punishment to those 19- even to 18 year old's was and is a possibility with extraordinary circumstances, and I didn't want you to be one to lower that age number to 17. To see you now be determined to change that result, I will be happy to assist you.’’

’’Thank you Sae-san.’’

Akira was lost words and could only utter the first half of his sentence.

’’Gorō you…’’

_You're planning to live? You won’t leave me like Morgana did?_

_I don’t have to see your shape hanged?_

_I can see you smile again?_

All of this was apparent the way his eyes shined, because Gorō had to turn his own eyes away.

’’After seeing how useless you are without somebody keeping an eye on you, I can’t leave you alone. You should learn to stand up on your own, it’s pitiful.’’

Akira couldn’t hold himself back anymore and threw his arms around the detective.

’’Thank you… I’m so glad… I’m so glad…’’

Gorō was taken back but didn’t reject him. Hesitantly he returned the gesture, like he didn't know how much strength he could use or where to put his hands.

Like he hadn't hugged another human in a long while.

’’You both should enjoy this evening. I can come to collect Akechi later.’’ Sae offered, seemingly snapping Gorō out of it, who gently pushed distance between him and Akira.

’’Sae-san aren’t you busy?’’

’’You have deserved this much, it’s the least I can do. Next time you see each other could take a while,’’ she reminded them and had this knowing look on her face. It was Christmas eve after all.*

’’People are now paying attention. I don’t think it’s wise-’’ The detective was back on guard as always, but Akira knew just how to appease the other boy.

’’Then we just do this.’’

The Trickster ruffled the detective's hair to a fluffy mess, bangs out of place and the sheer volume of the new hair style made him look a little taller. For the final touch Akira slipped his glasses to Gorō’s head, adjusting them behind his ears.

Sae was laughing.

’’How clever. I almost don’t recognize him. ’’

’’This is ridiculous.’’ Gorō looked flustered and he wasn’t sure if it was from the embarrassment or the close proximity they remained in.

’’If it works it works, now come on.’’ Akira intertwined the detective’s hand to his own and the other didn’t pull away.

\-----

After everything, Akira had been denied access to see Gorō outside the trials.

In the end the evidence of Metaverse and anything related was rejected. A set back yes, but his detective had been smart about all the evidence he had hidden. Even without the existence of Metaverse, Sae provided more than enough evidence of Shidō’s crimes and people related to him.

The few murders that had initially taken place by the yakuza who served Shidō, more than a share of serious frauds, and enough circumstantial evidence that together they provided strong enough argument for what had taken place; A theory that mental and psychotic breakdowns had been conducted by Shidō’s request, that even without a method, there was no denying it.

Shidō was charged with a lifetime in prison, dodged execution by a small margin because he had requested the crimes, and not done them himself.

Akechi wasn’t tried with the murders, as the Metaverse argument had fallen flat. Instead he had been charged with the possession of a firearm while minor and no license. This was undeniable as few of the evidence provided by the prosecution against Shidō relied on him holding it.

Gorō was ultimately charged with a month in rehabilitation center, as he had argued over Metaverse's existence which had brought his mental sanity into the question. A rare twist as in Japan the mental sanity defense wasn’t often used.

It all came as a great relief to Akira.

  
  


Now he had come to visit Gorō to the medical institute.

The waiting room was different from the room Akira had passed through before taken to the interrogation room. It was well maintained and the staff actually smiled when leading him to the room reserved for visitors. They didn’t even search his belongings.

It brought him the kind of peace to know the ex-detective was in good hands until he got released.

A door to the waiting room opened and Gorō walked in wearing white gown like those that pharmacist staff wore.

’’Hello Gorō. You’re looking wonderful as always,’’ Akira greeted.

The other boy sat opposite to him with an unimpressed look on his face.

’’Don’t try me. These overly sterile clothes are getting on my nerves.’’

His hair had grown even longer, Akira wondered if he would keep growing it. If he did, the Phantom thieves’ leader would have even more of a hard time controlling his impulse to run his hand through it.

’’Hey, white suits you,’’ he argued.

Last time he had seen Gorō in as much white was in the Metaverse; as Crow and Joker who had been working behind each other's back undercover.

’’So you say…’’ Gorō hummed, but seemed to have something else on his mind.

Akira leaned forward ready to listen.

’’…A foreign doctor here diagnosed me with a dissociative disorder,’’ he said in an amused tone and Akira blinked slowly.

’’A what now?’’

’’OSDD one dash A to be specific. Just something that might happens when you go through something awful,’’ he spoke vaguely. Akira didn’t know, was it because he himself didn’t believe it or because he was ashamed of it.

’’…Like PTSD?’’ he tested the grounds.

’’That too. I already knew that I had it, but this is different,’’ Gorō answered like it was nothing.

’’I can put on an act convincing enough, that I can fool myself and not just others with my different alters. That explains why I could use Personas differently than you. To _not need masks to wear with others but hide within yourself,_ or so that girl in the Velvet room said,’’ he analysed, self reflecting.

’’Explains your change in speech styles** with your Persona’s too,’’ Akira commented and Gorō snorted.

’’…Is it treatable?’’ Akira threaded to ask even if he had a strong guess.

The other shook his head.

’’No, just something I have to live with. Not that here in Japan they would have the necessary mental health care for something like this.’’

’’You’d be surprised. I know one Maruki Takuto. He was a counselor in Shūjin high-school after the Kamoshida fiasco. We all talked with him, even Yūsuke, and I can’t speak for others, but it helped.

He owns me a favor for helping him finish his studying paper, so I’m sure I could get an appointment for you,’’ Akira offered.

_Maruki could also help Gorō with his pessimist mindset._

’’…I’ll keep that in mind,’’ he didn’t refuse which Akira took as a yes.

’’Aargh-! I feel awkward with you two. I should leave,’’ Morgana whined and poked his head out of Akira’s bag.

’’Morgana? You… returned?’’ Gorō spoke with a pause, but he didn’t seem displeased.

For a short time after the Metaverse had collapsed, Morgana had lost his form temporarily, but had soon returned as one and only cat. Not a bus nor a cartoon thief cat, just a black cat.

He had attended Akechi's trials with Akira, but he couldn’t really show himself in front of Gorō until now.

Mona jumped on to the table. No one was keeping watch so Akira didn’t stop him.

’’Yes. As a cat, this time for real. Is that a smile I see? Are you happy to see me?’’ His tail swung in a circling motion telling of excitement.

’’Yes, even if I’m more of a dog than a cat person.’’ Gorō’s remark came with a sharp edge.

’’Hey!’’ Mona protested and Akira got a great idea.

’’Then how about we get a dog?’’ he suggested and the detective looked at him with reserved surprise.

’’Excuse me?’’

’’After we graduate,’’ Akira took a breath to calm his excitement.

’’I’m going home after this semester to… settle things with my parents. Have an honest talk. And you’re in your last year and you’re planning on going to university afterwards, right?’’ he laid the foundation for his thoughts. He wanted to give Gorō something to look forward to after he was free.

’’Yes and?’’ the ex-detective spoke impatiently.

’’You’re not going to a student dorm?’’ Akira guessed.

’’With my reputation and the way they talk about me on the TV, I rather not,’’ he noted darkly.

’’So let’s move in together! Split the rent and it'll be cheap. We can get a dog from the nearby shelter and we can make one happy family,’’ Akira proclaimed a little too loudly.

’’Hey! I’m… not sure about dogs…’’ Morgana let out a shy meow.

’’You’re awfully enthusiastic by all this. How do you know we’ll still get along when living under the same roof?’’ Gorō seemed unsure for Akira sake more than himself.

’’Of course. I can be with my favorite person, and we had practice at Leblanc already,’’ he was convinced.

’’…You are so overbearing,’’ Gorō hid his face.

’’But you love me?’’ Akira teased.

’’I’ll let you wonder.’’

’’Guys? I really don’t know about the dog…’’ Morgana reminded them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> * Christmas in Japan is seen as a day to spend with your romantic partner. A little like Valentine's day, as Christmas lacks the western meanings.
> 
> ** Akechi speaks using boku (僕) to refer to himself except when he fights as black mask then he uses ore (俺). This holds true even after he rejoins the team in royal. You usually use only one way to refer to yourself except in customer service when you use watashi (私) which is gender neutral, polite, and the base way to refer to yourself, (as in usually taught first).  
> Ore is masculine, rude, and forward way to refer to yourself while boku is still masculine but more polite way to refer to oneself.
> 
> I headcanon that Akechi has symptoms of DID and his actual diagnoses would be OSDD-1A.  
> DID is short for dissociative identity disorder; it manifests as the person having different ‘’alters’’ that can have different personality traits and goals. Because of this, these alters cause amnesia and the person with DID is not knowledgeable of their existence.  
> OSDD-1A or other specified dissociative disorder has most similarity with DID but the alters the person has don’t cause memory loss between the alters or otherwise not fully can be specified as alters.
> 
> I have this disorder and I find it apparent in Akechi’s untranslated version as aforementioned reasons and the following.  
> I interpret the detective prince facade as one alter (tries to please, and expresses mostly only positive emotions) and the black mask another alter (causes harm, expresses mostly only negative emotions) as the two main ones. In Royal his third alter, that most think of as Akechi’s ’’real self’’, is direct to the point and doesn't really emote as much.
> 
> (There could be a 4th that would be the state after his in before and after killing Akira or talking to Shidō. I thought it was more of a dissociative state where the person is in when committing homicide than an alter.)
> 
> I think all of these are ''the real Akechi'' otherwise it wouldn’t make sense for Akechi to develop a bond with Akira while pretending. Feel free to also check Akechi’s sprites for these three stages, I think it’s pretty clear visually.
> 
> Sequel with Maruki? Yes, you can click the next part of the Reversed series that covers the events of the Royal version after Christmas.
> 
> Thank you for the comments, kudos and for reading. I wrote this purely for myself to get that serotonin that I severely lack. I never expected to get such positive feedback as I’m not a native English speaker and I have dyslexia. Thank you so much!
> 
> \- Ruoste


End file.
